cristiano-ronaldo Page 3 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
They’re still Manchester Damn City
It’s a little surprising, just a bit, how a team that cantered to the Premier League title and was a Champions League finalist just a few months ago can somehow fly under the radar. But with the noise of Cristiano Ronaldo and his rape accusations landing across town, or Romelu Lukaku giving Chelsea ...
It’s hard to know who’s king twit of dumb mountain between Real Madrid, PSG, and Barcelona
The transfer window in soccer closed yesterday evening, and after Cristiano Ronaldo took his rape accusations to Manchester United, there weren’t too many surprises. Man City didn’t find the striker they were after, Chelsea added to an already ridiculous squad, blah blah blah. Perhaps everyone was j...
So is Ronaldo to United actually going to work?
You’d think if you were going to take on the burden of bringing back a twice-accused rapist to your club, the hierarchy would have to be pretty sure that it would make a huge difference on the field. But you’re not the Glazer family, who are so desperate to get Manchester United fans to stop burning...
So what’s to be done with Alexander Zverev?
The U.S. Open has a problem. The ATP has a problem. And neither is likely to do much about it. And no, it’s not the ranks of players pulling out of the tournament. ...
Adult website offering $100K for pitchers to drop their shorts because 2021
How much would it take for you to show your genitals online? Some people do it for free. Some people say they would never do it in a million years, but let’s be real… everybody’s got a price, and it has just been named for some of Major League Baseball’s elite pitchers....
Coca-Cola lost 4 billion in market value after Ronaldo endorsed water
Yes, billion with a b....
Euro 2021: Joachim Löw might wish he left before last call
We all know it’s hard to leave when you can’t find the door. But sometimes you pay even more when you ignore the door that was right there....
It only takes Juventus a minute to give up the dumbest goal
It hasn’t been a vintage season for Juventus, who look like they might surrender the Serie A title for the first time in 10 years. Their pursuit of the Champions League the past few years has moved beyond obsession, which led them to pay $120 million for Christiano Ronaldo a few years ago. That has ...
2020 Idiot of the Year Awards: Counting down from 50-41 with Ronaldo, Bolt, Cespedes, and more
UPDATE: We have compiled all 50 items into one handy list, for your reading convenience. It is available here....
Cristiano Ronaldo tests positive for COVID-19
Cristiano Ronaldo has been able to dodge the multiple sexual assault allegations that have been lodged against him, but 2020 caught up with the five-time Ballon d’Or winner on Tuesday as he was diagnosed with coronavirus....
When will soccer care about the sexual assault allegations against Cristiano Ronaldo?
If you’re a causal soccer fan, you might not know that Cristiano Ronaldo has been accused of sexual assault by multiple women. That’s because social media is chock-a-block full of images glorifying Ronaldo, his stats, and his comparison to soccer’s other Goliath, Lionel Messi. Here are some posts ab...
UEFA Did The Right Thing in Postponing Euro 2020, But A Lot Of Teams & Players Will Be Hurt By The Year Delay
As always, the disclaimer that none of this matters in the light of what’s going on in the world. But we don’t have much else to do but speculate and fantasize about the future at the moment, and I’m about two days from dressing the dog up as various wrestlers and recreating all their entrances. ...
We Can Now Add Jadon Sancho To The List Of Great Players Arsène Wenger "Almost" Signed
The only thing former Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger likes to talk about more than the philosophical implications of life as a soccer manager is all the players he claims he narrowly missed out on signing. The latest addition to this nearly infinite list of Almost Gunners is former Manchester City ac...
Cristiano Ronaldo Makes Fun Of VAR For Being A Killjoy After Scoring
Cristiano Ronaldo thought he’d scored his first goal of the new Serie A season last week, only for VAR to erase it due to one of those maddeningly marginal offside calls. In today’s match against Napoli, the Juventus forward once again found the back of the net, only this time the goal stood. In ack...
Cristiano Ronaldo Won't Face Rape Charges
Juventus forward Cristiano Ronaldo won’t face any criminal charges over an allegation that he raped a woman in a Las Vegas hotel in 2009, prosecutor Steve Wolfson said in a statement today, because Wolfson believes the charge can’t be proven beyond a reasonable doubt....
Ajax Have Slain Cristiano Ronaldo, Giant Of The Champions League
For only the second time in six seasons, Cristiano Ronaldo will not win the Champions League. For the first time in a decade, and only the second time in 13 years, he won’t even appear in one of the four semi-finals. Cristiano Ronaldo, the man who has loomed over the continent’s premier tournament l...
Cristiano Ronaldo Is Like Clockwork
Cross the ball, head the ball, score a goal. It is the simplest tactic in soccer. It is what practically all teams resort to when the need for a goal is at its most dire. It is a strategy without frills or subtlety. When it works, it is nearly unstoppable. However, it very rarely works—rarely in a s...
Cristiano Ronaldo Is In Trouble For His Thrusting Testicular Celebration<em></em>
UEFA announced on Monday that it has opened disciplinary proceedings against Cristiano Ronaldo, following the Juventus striker’s phallic celebration of his tie-clinching goal against Atlético Madrid in the round of 16 of the Champions League last week. ...
Cristiano Ronaldo And Juventus Got Exactly What They Were Looking For<em></em>
Cristiano Ronaldo’s decision to leave Real Madrid last summer was a bet on himself. It was a bet that for as unstoppable a force of nature he’d become, as perfectly complementary a supporting cast he’d found, and as much fame and adulation and trophies and awards he’d won at the most famous and succ...
