da Page 1021 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Is What It Looked Like When Heinz Field Became The Home Of The Gotham Rogues
As mentioned in Wake Up Deadspin, "The Dark Knight Rises" production took over Heinz Field, home of the Pittsburgh Steelers, today. They called for about 10,000 extras and some Steelers, including newly married Ben Roethlisberger, were expected to be on camera....

Someone Took The Time To Write About How The Credit Downgrade Could Affect The NHL
Some of you math-y sporty types out there have probably wondered what Standard & Poor's downgraded rating on U.S. government debt means for the world of athletics....

<em>Welcome Back, JaMarcus</em>: Russell Will Return To LSU In The Fall To Take Some Classes
LSU Sports Information Director Michael Bonnette tweeted yesterday that former Oakland Raiders quarterback JaMarcus Russell would be returning to Baton Rouge to take classes in the fall. In his honor, we've cut you the opening credits of Welcome Back, JaMarcus....

David Ortiz Wants His Fucking RBI
Before last night's game, Ortiz crashed Terry Francona's press conference with some strong language and poor timing. "I'm fucking pissed. We need to have a talk."...

Pee Wee Herman Spent Some Time With Tony Romo Today At Cowboys Camp
Per the Dallas Morning News, "Pee-Wee Herman was at Cowboys' practice Thursday night in a gray suit with a red bowtie. He took some time to pose for a photo with Jerry Jones and his sons, Stephen and Jerry Jr. No word on if coach Jason Garrett will hang it up at Valley Ranch as another motivational...

Here's An Awkward Interview In Which Tommy Lasorda Ponders How He'd Pitch To A Dwarf
Last night, Tommy Lasorda made it perfectly clear that he wants to be referred to as "Tommy Pump" from now on. At present, Tommy Pump is on a mission to right the wrongs of Dodgers fandom....

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part VI: Robot Surrogates And The Abyss
Consider this your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is frozen in amber so humans of the future can study the behavior of assholes in the 21st century. (For tho...

Darren Rovell's Rays Jersey Breaks His Seventh Rule Of Twitter
Darren Rovell, CNBC's sports business reporter and self-professed master of the Twitter, sang the Canadian and U.S. national anthems at the Blue Jays-Rays game today at Tropicana Field. He did a fine job. But he forgot rule number seven of his 100 Twitter rules to tweet by:...

James Dolan In Concert, Performing "Fix The Knicks"
Dolan, lead singer of JD and the Straight Shot, is a true singer-songwriter. He writes from the heart. He writes what he knows. Basically, he writes about people yelling at him all the time for doing such a shitty job running the Knicks....

Who Tries To Board An Airplane With A Loaded Gun? Darius Miles, That's Who
"Miles, 29, was arrested about 3:30 p.m. after Transportation Security Administration personnel discovered the weapon during an X-ray screening at the airport, according to information from a TSA spokeswoman and a jail official. ... It was unclear whether the gun was found in luggage or whether Mil...

Nomar Garciaparra Appears To Have Drowned Himself In A Sea Of Cliches
Your morning roundup for Aug. 4, the day Dollywood offered a refund to a couple of lesbians. H/T to Adam for the video clip. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Of The Four Goals Chivas Scored Against Barcelona Tonight, This One's The Best
This was Marco Fabian's second goal for Chivas de Guadalajara in its friendly vs. FC Barcelona tonight. In the end, it was the game winner, but Chivas would score another pair for good measure....

Ichiro's Doppelganger Tried To Sabotage The Mariners Last Night
Have we not yet learned our lesson, America? Is Bartman's ultimate cautionary tale still not enough? Let the players make their plays. Even if you happen to look eerily similar to one of them....

Bruce Pearl May Be Headed To The D-League
Former Tennessee coach Bruce Pearl is likely set to take over the Texas Legends, the Dallas Maverick's D-League affiliate that went 24-26 and made it to the playoffs in the 16-team, two-conference organization last season. ESPN's Marc Stein reported the team's initial invitation this afternoon, and ...

Dan Snyder Is Now Campaigning Against The Rights Of D.C. Residents To Govern Themselves
Dan Snyder's lawyers yesterday filed a brief in D.C. Superior Court as part of Snyder's dumbass legal jihad against the Washington City Paper. Snyder's lawsuit looks for all the world like a "strategic lawsuit against public participation." Even the ACLU thinks so. Such "SLAPP" suits are deployed by...

Usage Note: "It's The Dallas Football Cowboys," Says Jason Stupid Garrett
We already flagged the absurdity of Dallas Cowboys coach Jason Garrett's announcement that this year's rookies will have to earn the right to wear the logo of a team that's hasn't won anything since those rookies were in the Pop Warner Tiny-Mite division. Go ahead, treat the Cowboy star as a rah-rah...

Will ESPN's Coverage Of Northwestern's Dan Persa Convince ESPN To Cover Dan Persa? ESPN Investigates
This is a story on ESPN.com about a Heisman marketing campaign launched by Northwestern on behalf of quarterback Dan Persa. The school has purchased billboard space not in Times Square but in Bristol, Conn., near ESPN headquarters. "Northwestern," writes ESPN's Adam Rittenberg on ESPN.com, "is hopin...

Terrible Defensive Shortstop Miguel Tejada Is Angry At San Francisco Media For Writing About His Terrible Defense
So the Giants acquired Proven October Shortstop™ Orlando Cabrera from Cleveland yesterday, because their GM, Brian Sabean, is a veteran-loving fool who doesn't have eyes, apparently....

Chris Kluwe Conditionally Surrenders No. 5 To New Vikings QB Donovan McNabb
Your morning roundup for July 30, the day we're provided with living proof that 32-year-old women are, in fact, into 83-year-old men. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Life, Death, And Sex On Skis
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. With things sweltering outside, we went looking for stories that might remind us of what it feels like to be cold. We found these instead....