da Page 1078 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Reporter Is Unamused By Our Tale Of Minor-League Cock Hijinks
Recently, Giants farmhand Garrett Broshuis shared the story of his teammate's dong-waggling mating ritual, which Garrett likened to the furious, metronomic beating of a toy drum. And now, the reporter for whom the drum was furiously, metronomically beaten is outraged....
Redskins Season Quickly Devolving Into Roland Emmerich Film
Oh, man. This Washington Redskins season. Let this be a lesson to you other teams: if you're not gonna contend for the playoffs, please have the courtesy to implode in the most hilarious manner possible....
USC's Blake Ayles Thanks Notre Dame Fans For Their Hospitality
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Sixty Minutes Of Action Summed Up In One Screengrab
Our early games promised two marquee match-ups, and though one disappointed, we learned a bit about who's for real....
David Wells Isn't Ashamed Of His Bodily Functions
If I told you one of TBS' studio crew farted live on the air, then proudly admitted it to his viewing audience, would it have taken you long to guess which one?...
Microwaving Poop Lands Canadian Football Players In Deep Doo-Doo
If there's one thing my grandfather told me that I have always held on to was when he said, "Don't put shit inside something you use to heat food that you intend to eat." But Gramps always got sayings wrong....
Two Men And A Little Tommy
Kobe Byrant, the newly single Frank McCourt, and a very sleepy Tommy Lasorda took in Game 2 of the NLCS today. Of course, this was in the fourth inning, so the trio is probably already eating dinner in Malibu....
Jerry Jones Thinks Wade Phillips Can Totally Beat The Patriots This Year
"Two years ago the Giants were in trouble," Jones said. "It was also absolutely expected that something was going to happen with the coach....Well, that same year they won the Super Bowl....This is a long, long journey." [DMN]...
OU Has Already Lost The Red River Embarrassing Music Video Rivalry
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Florida State Produces Student-Athletes, Not In That Order
In an NCAA transcript on FSU's violations, it emerged that some Noles read at a second grade level. Warning flags were raised when Leon Washington told the Jets at the combine his favorite book was "Go, Dog, Go." [Yahoo!]...
Ryan Leaf Used To Be Carried In The Arms Of Cheerleaders. Part 87
New blue blood/great white hope, Ryan Leaf has finally kicked his silly vicodin addiction and is busy starting his life over (again) in "environmentally soothing" Vancouver, B.C. He says he's finally found the cause of his personal problems — football....
Florida Gymnast Lets Boyfriend Turn Her Apartment Into Weapons Cache
A University of Florida gymnast was arrested yesterday after police discovered "a safe, nine shotguns or rifles and two computers" in her apartment, all of which were stolen by her totally awesome boyfriend....
Davies Update: South Africa Looking Unlikely
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
U.S. Striker Charlie Davies In Surgery After Serious Car Accident (UPDATE)
The national team's promising 23-year-old forward was apparently involved in this grim one-car accident along the George Washington Parkway, which ripped an SUV in half. One woman died at the scene. Davies' injuries are reportedly not life-threatening....
Is Beer Die A Good Drinking Game Or Not?
Time for your Deadspin Open Mailbag Tuesday. Email us here or submit your questions via Twitter. This week, we're covering piss boners, mayo shits, Nick Adenhart, beer die, fitted sheets, and more....
Staying Out Late, Sweating Make Anthony Kim A "Loose Cannon"
Anthony Kim was a key player in the U.S.'s President's Cup win this weekend, despite the fact that he didn't sleep much and doesn't really want to hang with Jim Fuyrk. The man is out of control!...
Josh McDaniels Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Josh McDaniels, who won the weekend by proving that he's not a foolishly incompetent man-child. Yes, the bar was set pretty low....
Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Touching The Hem Of His Garment Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....
Oakland Should Be Prosecuted For Crimes Against Humanity
I know it's cruel to keep featuring the Raiders today, but it was cruel of CBS to put them on my television. And really, holy crap, JaMarcus....
Where's (The Great) Waldo?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....