da Page 1090 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phillies Still Dawdling On Halladay, Just In Case Happ Or Drabek Is Next Halladay And Not Next Mike Grace
The Phillies were all but guaranteed to land the Greatest Pitcher Ever at some point this weekend, but Blue Jays' GM J.P. Ricciardi's now justifiably hard-balling. Impasse!...

And Now For A Minute Of Actual Sports
Roy Halladay is not a member of the Phillies ... yet. The Toronto Blue Jays' demands of executive bathroom privileges proved too steep for the Philadelphia bigwigs....

Nate Montana Finds Better Football Situation Than Notre Dame
Joe Montana's son has seen Rudy. He knows how this works. First you go to junior college, THEN you try out for Notre Dame....

Hopefully The Wilpons Have Extra Chairs
Mets fans are sick and tired of being sick and tired. The team is playing like balls. They're gonna do something about it ... bug the executives!...

Matt Holliday Gets Sucked Into The Strong, Midwestern Embrace Of The St. Louis Cardinals
"The Athletics and Cardinals have completed a trade that sends outfielder Matt Holliday to St. Louis in exchange for third baseman Brett Wallace, outfielder Shane Peterson and right-handed pitcher Clayton Mortensen, sources told ESPN The Magazine's Buster Olney." [ESPN]...

Steve Spurrier Apologizes For Not Genuflecting To The Tebow
SEC coaches and journalists spent maybe six hours of the conference's three-day media tugjob fretting over the vicious bastard who didn't pick Tim Tebow as No. 1 Super QB of the year. All because Steve Spurrier can't read....

Your Daily Dead Mets Walking Update
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A Reminder That College Hockey Players Can Be Dumb Jocks Too
An NHL prospect and a college teammate got together for a little reunion, and did what any old friends would do: they climbed a roof, and chucked everything not nailed down in the house into the street....

Former ML'er A Texas-Sized Deadbeat Dad
Troy Neel, who bought an island in fricking Vanuatu to avoid paying his state-record $700,000 in child support, was sentenced today. That's twice as much as he earned in his three years in MLB. [San Antonio Express-News]...

One Mission Tim Tebow Won't Accomplish This Year
Thanks to Clay Travis' question, it's official: Tim Tebow is saving himself for marriage! That's splendid for Sports Illustrated, which will now recycle this cover for next week's issue. See? Even journalism is no match for Tim Tebow. [FanHouse]...

Jay Mariotti On Erin Andrews, AutoSummarized
"Why was the Internet ... giving semi-lives to people with no lives?" thunders Mariotti, who writes for the Internet. The column goes on in this vein for 1,500 words. Let's send this through Microsoft Word's AutoSummarize function, shall we?...

Red Sox Trading For Players They Don't Even Want
The Red Sox, in full panic mode and mistakenly believing they were allowed a 45-man roster, are now collecting baseball players the way most people collect baseball cards: They don't have the space or use for them....

Spectacularly Awful Beats Boringly Mediocre Every Time
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Fan Who Charged Beckham Feels Wrath Of Home Depot
The L.A. Galaxy fan who leapt out of the stands to answer David Beckham's challenge may face a fate worth than jail or death—a lifetime ban from the Home Depot Center. Even for the Vans Warped Tour?...

The (Mobile) Internet Is For Porn
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

And Here's The Front Page Of Tomorrow's <em>New York Post</em>
Amazingly, Busted Coverage's ridiculous giant penis-wielding bachelorette story was completely true. This photo tells the tale: the daring lass staring down the determined Tahoe sheriff as Michael Jordan cautiously avoids a messy inflatable dong confrontation. Yay America....

This Little Furry Will Be Shaq's Reality Show Sidekick
"Ive been alotta place but being at the shaolin temple n china has brouhht a tear to my eye buddha blessed," Shaq recently tweeted. So he cried on the shoulder of a giant panda, and turned that frown upside down....

Goodbye, Local Media. Hello, ESPN YourTown
Remember ESPNChicago, the synergtastic "local" website built to honor the Windy City and maybe make all the city's media outlets bow down in servitude to their Bristol masters? It worked! Oh....and you're next, Dallas! (Cue "Imperial March.")...

Not Even Jay Mariotti Agrees With Jay Mariotti
Mariotti, July 15: "It's going to take time" for people to move past "the '09 double whammy of Alex Rodriguez and Manny Ramirez." Mariotti, July 17: People have moved past the Manny Ramirez scandal. [Mlive.com]...

Beckham Experiment Descends Into Fear And Loathing, Lesson In The Subjectivity Of Perception
Beckham played his first home game back with the Galaxy yesterday, and things got ugly. Either a fan nearly attacked him (per the U.S. press), or he nearly attacked a fan (per the Brits). It's like Rashomon in shinguards!...