da Page 487 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cowboys WR Allen Hurns Leaves Game On Stretcher After Gruesome Leg Injury
In the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game, Cowboys receiver Allen Hurns was tackled by Seahawks safety Bradley McDougald. As Hurns was fighting to stay upright, McDougald fell onto Hurns’s left leg and broke it....
ESPN Doesn't Appear To Know What Happened During The Civil War
In the latest example of why things from the internet should stay on the internet, the Monday Night Football crew decided to talk about their latest online discovery: the Capt. Andrew Luck twitter account. For those unfamiliar, the parody account features an avatar of Luck’s face over a Civil War ge...
Dirk Nowitzki Couldn't Get The Two Measly Points The Celtics Kind Of Wanted To Give Him
“Most career points in the arena by a visiting Western Conference player” is the type of mark that’s closer to a tough trivia answer than a cherished record, and Dirk Nowitzki only needed a single field goal to pass Kobe Bryant for it in Boston last night. Everyone involved wanted the vile Kobe to l...
Peter King Is Back On His Bullshit, Removes Antonio Brown From All-Pro Ballot To Appease His "Good Conscience"
Peter King did what Peter King does best and decided to stand up for the moral sanctity of a league institution: the NFL’s All-Pro team. The former Sports Illustrated columnist told Mike Florio on Friday’s Pro Football Talk Live that he couldn’t “in good conscience” keep Steelers wideout Antonio Bro...
Jared Allen's Curling Team Of Ex-NFLers Is Starting From The Bottom And Aiming For The Olympics
It doesn’t happen with skeleton or short track speed skating, and definitely not ski jumping, because we all have families that love us. But we’ve all thought about it while watching Olympic curling: How hard can it be? The calculated walking. The histrionic screams. Pushing the rock, or whatever it...
Report: "Football Guys" Have Broken The Pelicans And May Scare Anthony Davis Away
NBC Sports’ NBA insider Tom Haberstroh makes the case that the Pelicans have failed Anthony Davis and seems to imply that the organization’s chances of bringing back the generational talent have grown rather slim. While he goes through a bunch of factors that show just how mediocre the franchise has...
The Giants Are Maybe Ready To Maybe Maybe Maybe Move On From Eli Manning
Giants general manager and ornery math-hater Dave Gettleman did his year-end press conference on Wednesday. Predictably, the questions tended to angle for information about the team’s quarterback situation, where Eli Manning has become a tomato can while somehow also putting up one of the more conve...
The Booger Mobile Has Been Decommissioned For The Season, And Possibly Forever<em></em>
Bad news for all those Boogerheads out there: ESPN will not be utilizing Booger McFarland’s whimsical and obnoxiously large contraption for this weekend’s Colts-Texans wild-card playoff game. The Booger Mobile’s aspirations for world domination have hit a snag....
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
Happy new year, one and all. This year, resolve to take better care of your dick and balls; last year you did a really bad job of it....
These NFL Coaches Sucked Enough To Get Fired This Year
Hue Jackson and Mike McCarthy were horrible enough to get canned during the regular season, but now that Week 17's wrapped up, it’s time for all the other disappointing NFL head coaches to join them in the Great Coordinator Gig in the Sky. Here’s a brief roundup of everyone who’s been canned today....
Dan Snyder Doesn't Get It
Was this it, finally? Was this the utter embarrassment needed for Dan Snyder, who has owned an NFL team for 20 years and watched it descend over that time from the ranks of the league’s proud/storied/whatever franchises into a permanent laughingstock—over which time the one constant has been Snyder ...
Amanda Nunes's Destruction Of MMA's Most Feared Woman Was Shockingly Easy
Before Amanda Nunes blitzed her last night at UFC 232, the closest fearsome Brazilian destroyer Cris Cyborg came to losing against top-level competition was a dominant decision win against Holly Holm last year. Aside from that bout and a career-starting kneebar loss—the sort most strikers have on th...
Clemson Reminded Us That Notre Dame Is A Fraud
Who didn’t see this coming? For what’s felt like the entire college football season, Notre Dame had the air of championship pretenders, despite running the table through their hand-picked schedule. In Saturday’s first College Football Playoff semi-final, Clemson put any doubt about that assumption t...
The Cotton Bowl Pregame Eagle Went Rogue All Over JerryWorld
Prior to the Cotton Bowl college football semifinal between prepared No. 3 Notre Dame and No. 2 Clemson, one intrepid bird of prey decided to take a flying tour throughout the 100,000-seat monument to Jerry Jones’ overcompensation:...
Anthony Davis Has Not Been Traded Yet, Is Still Amazing At Basketball
It sure was nice of Anthony Davis, who is not yet a member of the Los Angeles Lakers, to up his trade value on Friday night. The NBA’s only commodity worth talking about, apparently, threw up 48 points to go along with 17 rebounds, as the New Orleans Pelicans, his current team, beat the Dallas Mave...
Dallas Stars CEO Takes A Heaping Dump On His Team's Most Prominent Players
The Dallas Stars are currently eighth in the NHL’s Western Conference, and are narrowly holding onto the second Wild Card spot. But they’re just 4–8 over their last 12 games, and stars Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin are ranked 57th and 67th in the league in scoring, respectively. Apparently, disappoint...
How Stupid And Toothless Does The NBA Now Look Trying To Manage This Shit
The escalating non-story of LeBron James making moves on Anthony Davis finally ensnared the NBA league office on Friday, with league counsel reportedly reminding teams via a carefully worded memo that only great big meanies would ever honestly answer a question about whether it is good to have good ...
Nevada Coach Jay Norvell Hath Donned The Blue Shirt Of Inspiration
In general, football head coaches are pretty much the dullest, weirdest, most wooden-brained group of men on earth, just a bunch of sweaty cosplaying doofuses blindly guessing at how to do their ridiculous job and what it even means to be good at that job, which probably isn’t really one job at all ...
Dexter Lawrence Probably Should Have Skipped The Cotton Bowl
In the span of a week, Clemson defensive tackle Dexter Lawrence had a drug test come back positive for an anabolic steroid not approved for human use or consumption in the U.S., or in any other country, vehemently denied in front of reporters that he knowingly put anything illegal into his body, and...