da Page 705 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Orlando Scandrick Plays <i>Madden</i> To Win, Even At A Children's Hospital
Orlando Scandrick apparently visited a children's hospital yesterday, and according to linebacker Justin Durant, Scandrick whooped some punk in Madden. The Cowboys cornerback even went with a surprise onside kick on the kid. You have to be ready for anything, little Timmy....
German Zombie Scores Game-Winning Goal While Wearing A Defibrillator
Why, you might be asking, do the other members of German third tier side Stuttgart Kickers react to Daniel Engelbrecht's not particularly impressive game-winning goal, scored in stoppage time, with such passion and joy? Well, it's because Engelbrecht is a real life zombie....
Report: The Knicks All Hate Each Other
Stop me if you've heard this before, but the Knicks are a mess....
More Proof That Anheuser-Busch Hates You, Me, And Nature's Finest Fruit
Apples are the best fruit, because in addition to being delicious, they are also versatile. Apples can be juiced, pied, carameled, candied, fermented, distilled, cidered, crisped, jacked, brown bettied!, eaten plain without a fuss like you're some kind of goddamn health monster determined to live ...
Awful Neighbor Sics City On Backyard Rink That Causes "Visual Harm"
Backyard ice rinks are a tradition in Canada and the northern United States. They are practically the only benefit of living in the goddamn tundra. Some backyard rinks are amateur affairs, nothing more than some 2x4s and a hose, while others cost thousands of dollars and have lights, real boards, an...
TCU Got Screwed, And That's The Point
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering LeBron and Kate, toilet coffee, jar monkeys, and more....
Dogfish 120 Minute IPA Is America's Classiest One-Beer Buzz
I've been drinking irresponsibly lately, by which I mean all of the usual things, but also that I've been forgetting to use the stupid notebook in which I differentiate between beers with "strong grapefruit character" and those that merely display "pronounced citrus notes." I draw little trees next ...
Man Loses Fantasy Football Bet, Does Worst Al Pacino Impression
This reenactment of Al Pacino's famous Any Given Sunday speech has no business being funny, but it is, somehow. The reader who sent it along says the guy half-heartedly playing Tony D'Amato lost a fantasy football bet, and had to make this video as punishment....
Here's An Underrated IPA From A Properly Rated State
New Hampshire is often overlooked by my fellow Massachusettsian beer-drinkers and life-lovers, and this is a shame. All we tend to know about the Granite (or Marble?) State is that there's no sales tax but high property tax (or perhaps vice versa), and it's got either a nice, long coastline or, if t...
Man Throws Snake At Tim Hortons Employee After Argument Over Onions
This morning, two customers got into an argument over onions with an employee at a Saskatoon Tim Hortons, and one of the men immediately ended the argument by throwing a snake. Snake coming in hot!...
The Bag Represents Everyone's Souls
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
The Biggest Two-Yard Run Of Week 14
Glancing briefly at box scores will tell you the Colts beat the Browns and Andrew Luck threw a go-ahead touchdown with 32 seconds remaining. But the box score won't tell you the leverage of the plays leading up to the touchdown, or that Boom Herron's two-yard rush immediately preceding the touchdo...
Joseph Fauria Scores, Twerks
Lions tight end Joseph Fauria scored his first touchdown of the season today, which means Joseph Fauria danced. Joseph Fauria is good at dancing....
This Is Why You Didn't Make The Playoff, Baylor
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
Alabama, Oregon, FSU, And Ohio State Make College Football Playoff
Your college football playoff selections are here, and Alabama, Oregon, Florida State, and Ohio State will face off to decide this season's national champion....
Josh Levin looks at the inaccurate rage of #FSUTwitter, and compares it to another subculture that was concerned about ethics in journalism. The money quote: "Here's what #FSUTwitter doesn't seem to understand: If you believe that Winston is innocent, then you should be mad as hell about the slow, i...
Panthers' Video Joking About Buffalo Snowstorm Angers Sabres Owner
The Florida Panthers showed a video before Saturday night's game against the Sabres, contrasting Buffalo's awful, cold weather with Florida's ideal conditions. The gag used photos from Buffalo's deadly November snowstorm, and Sabres owner Terry Pegula, who was in attendance, did not appreciate the j...
I Can't Breathe
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
Jay Gruden May Lose His Job Unless He Makes Nice With Robert Griffin
Washington coach Jay Gruden could be out of a job after this season because of his desire to part ways with Robert Griffin III, according to Jason Reid of The Washington Post. ...