da Page 982 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Nomar Garciaparra Appears To Have Drowned Himself In A Sea Of Cliches
Your morning roundup for Aug. 4, the day Dollywood offered a refund to a couple of lesbians. H/T to Adam for the video clip. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Of The Four Goals Chivas Scored Against Barcelona Tonight, This One's The Best
This was Marco Fabian's second goal for Chivas de Guadalajara in its friendly vs. FC Barcelona tonight. In the end, it was the game winner, but Chivas would score another pair for good measure....
Ichiro's Doppelganger Tried To Sabotage The Mariners Last Night
Have we not yet learned our lesson, America? Is Bartman's ultimate cautionary tale still not enough? Let the players make their plays. Even if you happen to look eerily similar to one of them....
Bruce Pearl May Be Headed To The D-League
Former Tennessee coach Bruce Pearl is likely set to take over the Texas Legends, the Dallas Maverick's D-League affiliate that went 24-26 and made it to the playoffs in the 16-team, two-conference organization last season. ESPN's Marc Stein reported the team's initial invitation this afternoon, and ...
Dan Snyder Is Now Campaigning Against The Rights Of D.C. Residents To Govern Themselves
Dan Snyder's lawyers yesterday filed a brief in D.C. Superior Court as part of Snyder's dumbass legal jihad against the Washington City Paper. Snyder's lawsuit looks for all the world like a "strategic lawsuit against public participation." Even the ACLU thinks so. Such "SLAPP" suits are deployed by...
Usage Note: "It's The Dallas Football Cowboys," Says Jason Stupid Garrett
We already flagged the absurdity of Dallas Cowboys coach Jason Garrett's announcement that this year's rookies will have to earn the right to wear the logo of a team that's hasn't won anything since those rookies were in the Pop Warner Tiny-Mite division. Go ahead, treat the Cowboy star as a rah-rah...
Will ESPN's Coverage Of Northwestern's Dan Persa Convince ESPN To Cover Dan Persa? ESPN Investigates
This is a story on ESPN.com about a Heisman marketing campaign launched by Northwestern on behalf of quarterback Dan Persa. The school has purchased billboard space not in Times Square but in Bristol, Conn., near ESPN headquarters. "Northwestern," writes ESPN's Adam Rittenberg on ESPN.com, "is hopin...
Terrible Defensive Shortstop Miguel Tejada Is Angry At San Francisco Media For Writing About His Terrible Defense
So the Giants acquired Proven October Shortstop™ Orlando Cabrera from Cleveland yesterday, because their GM, Brian Sabean, is a veteran-loving fool who doesn't have eyes, apparently....
Chris Kluwe Conditionally Surrenders No. 5 To New Vikings QB Donovan McNabb
Your morning roundup for July 30, the day we're provided with living proof that 32-year-old women are, in fact, into 83-year-old men. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Life, Death, And Sex On Skis
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. With things sweltering outside, we went looking for stories that might remind us of what it feels like to be cold. We found these instead....
Florida International University Hires Noted Sociologist Rick Sanchez
The AP reported — and a tanned portrait, complete with dapper summer hat, on the Florida International University sports site confirms — that former CNN anchor Rick Sanchez has been hired to be the radio voice of the FIU Golden Panthers football team. Sanchez has two sons at FIU....
Carmelo Anthony Is The Panda Whisperer
Melo is traveling across Asia on a Nike promotional tour, and as we all know there's nothing to do in China but pose with disoriented panda cubs on your lap. Look at that thing! Its little paws joined in supplication, its little panda cloaca (or whatever) splayed to the world. Panda doesn't care abo...
Once Upon A Time, A.C. Green, David Robinson, And Barry Sanders Made An Abstinence Video Together
If you, too, are "down with the honeys" and "the s-word," then consider heeding their early-90s call....
The London Olympic Medals Are Here, And They've Got That Weird Lisa Simpson Blowjob Logo
With a year to go before the London Games, they've been having all sorts of ceremonies to start the countdown. Today saw the unveiling of the designs for the medals, which will be the heaviest (though not the largest) ever handed out....
Colby Rasmus Is Thrilled That Obama Isn't President In Canada
With Rasmus moving north of the border, Joe Sports Fan thought it would be a good time to unveil this undated photo of Colby making his political views known in the most effective way known to man — via t-shirt. So in a way, Rasmus is like everyone who's ever bitched that if an election didn't go th...
ESPN's Sources Are Awfully Chatty Today
Tipsters Amos and Miles alerted us to the "Headlines" section of ESPN.com. We await the Poynter Institute's 76,000-word monograph on why Adam Schefter really just needs to sleep. [ESPN.com]...
Jeff Saturday On Hugging It Out
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Colts and Patriots, sitting in a tree....
Guess Who Arrived First For Broncos Practice Today?
At 8:01 this morning: "Tim Tebow. Of course." [@AdamSchefter]...
Kansas City's MLS Team Compiled Laughable, Stereotype-Filled Video To Introduce Its Canadian Opponent
This introduction video, via KCKRS, is perhaps the greatest semi-official compilation of cheap Canadian stereotypes known to man....
Everybody Feared The Worst When Old Man Brent Musburger Went Rogue In Vegas For A Spell
Your morning roundup for July 23, the day after we learned that high-school tennis coaches really might want to stay away from strip-club ownership....