da Page 983 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kansas City's MLS Team Compiled Laughable, Stereotype-Filled Video To Introduce Its Canadian Opponent
This introduction video, via KCKRS, is perhaps the greatest semi-official compilation of cheap Canadian stereotypes known to man....

Everybody Feared The Worst When Old Man Brent Musburger Went Rogue In Vegas For A Spell
Your morning roundup for July 23, the day after we learned that high-school tennis coaches really might want to stay away from strip-club ownership....

Jon Miller Still Pissed At ESPN For Firing Him
The gang at 790 The Ticket in Miami, the Marlins' flagship station and an ESPN outpost, wanted to do something swell for Dave Van Horne, who is receiving the Baseball Hall of Fame's Ford C. Frick Award tomorrow. So they decided to put together a montage of congratulatory clips from other Hall of Fa...

Is That Bigfoot? Nah, Just John Daly Relieving Himself Against A Tree
Your morning roundup for July 22, the day we learned Kim Jong Il orders in from McDonald's. H/T to Kyle for the photo, which he snapped during a practice round at the RBC Canadian Open in Vancouver. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Kim Kardashian Files $20M Lawsuit Over Ad Featuring Ex-Boyfriend Reggie Bush's Kardashian-Lookalike Current Girlfriend
Yesterday, a woman who built a "reality star" career from a sex tape that turned her ass into a household name filed suit against a clothing store for featuring a woman who built an "Old Navy commercial star" career from looking like the woman with the sex-tape ass. Fun fact: reality star is New O...

An Appreciation Of Kevin Manning, DC's Resident Boozy, One-Armed Tennis Prankster
Our man at the Washington City Paper, Dave McKenna, has written an appreciation of Kevin Manning, a DC-area tennis character who passed away from cancer earlier this year....

End Of Two-A-Days: The Players Win An Early Labor Battle
It's being framed as Bart Scott playing the contrarian, but that's burying the lede. The real story is the elimination of two-a-day practices in training camp, a change midwifed during these climactic lockout negotiations....

ESPN's Cringing, Persnickety, Condom-Obsessed Standards And Practices Manual, Presented Unabridged
Below you'll find ESPN's editorial and advertising guidelines as of 2010, sent to us by a tipster. They are the sort of guidelines one finds beneath coffee mugs at any typical media company: binder with laminated cover; nice paper stock; a general air of scolding, constipated didacticism that's like...

Here's Ndamukong Suh Dancing To Katy Perry's "Hot N Cold"
When we last checked in on Ndamukong Suh, he was eating himself. Now he's tweeting himself dancing to "Hot n Cold." This is his first and likely last Katy-Perry-inspired video, as the lockout looks close to over and he'd have to get a permit to strap fireworks to his chest in Michigan. [Complex]...

Radio Broadcaster Who Looks Freakishly Like Tim Howard Bumps Into Tim Howard
According to Greg Matzek, Milwaukee-area radio personality on 620-WTMJ (an appropriate call sign, given most talk radio folks' penchant for gratuitous gab), he's been told hundreds of times that he looks like Tim Howard. He says he was confused for Tim Howard on the red carpet at the 2007 ESPYs—we b...

Michael Jordan Can Still Dunk, Sort Of
At 48 years old, Michael Jordan can still dunk a basketball. That seems merited. Here's the Bobcats owner at the team's fantasy basketball camp yesterday, throwing down (to use the term lightly!) at the request of a camper. Still, as TBJ points out, we've seen worse from Mike — even when he was a ...

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part V: Return To River Bend
We already posted your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is nailed to a cross while dogs gnaw off its toes. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All...

Tony Romo Will Be A Leader, As Soon As He's Finished Golfing
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: there is a time for football, and this is not it....

Here's The Harry Potter-Referencing Legal Brief The ACLU Filed In The Dumbass Dan Snyder Libel Suit
The ACLU filed a brief yesterday in D.C. Superior Court slamming Dan Snyder for his dumbass libel lawsuit against the Washington City Paper and asking the court to toss out the case. D.C. councilmember Mary Cheh joined the brief, along with a raft of influential news organizations such as The Americ...

UAE Soccer Player May Be Punished For "Disrespectful"-But-Also-Awesome Backheel Penalty Kick
On Sunday, Theyab Awana, a 21-year-old winger with the United Arab Emirates national team, scored on a penalty kick in a friendly against Lebanon. Only he did it off of a 180 and using his heel. UAE was up 5-2 at the time, and they ultimately won 7-2, so the stakes weren't very high for either tea...

Maybe Now The Dodgers Can Officially Add Bankruptcy To The Lineup
Your morning roundup for July 19, the day we learned to stay out of the way when Real Madrid rides around in a golf cart. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Zubazpalooza > MC Hammer Bobblehead Night
The long-awaited MC Hammer bobblehead night finally arrived in Oakland yesterday, and it was rather exciting for everyone involved....

Hamburger Face Won't Keep This Tour De France Rider Down
Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood. Old Onion dummy text, but it might make an appropriate headline for any given day at this year's Tour de France, aka DeathFrance 3000....

Meat Loaf Was My Softball Coach
In 1991, I was a high school freshman in the small town of Redding, Conn. My brother was a senior, and his prom date was one of our neighbors down the street, a junior, Pearl Aday. Pearl would drive me home from softball practice when her father, our coach, was unable to. I preferred Pearl, as her d...

Planking Reaches Its Inevitable Low Point With These Two Dallas News Anchors Named Chip And Tim
They ruined it for us....