dallas Page 67 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Weekend Read: D Magazine on Young Tony Romo
Tony Romo, who is 32 and in his prime as an NFL quarterback, comes from an altogether different era. That's all I can draw from the current issue of D Magazine, in which Peter Simek drills down into a single high-school game to explain Romo's ascent from small-town jock-of-all-trades to a guy with t...

Roger Goodell's Sanctimonious Pledge To "Make Everything Safer, Including Our Military"
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Jerry Jones, Job Creator, Has An Assistant Whose Job Is To Clean Jerry's Glasses
NBC provided a shot of Cowboys owner Jerry Jones in his luxury box during last night's Dallas-Giants season opener, and eagle-eyed fans would notice a young man in a dangerously-unbuttoned shirt accepting Jones's glasses, polishing them, then handing them back....

Rob Ryan Has Some Words For You, And Those Words Appear To Be "Go For It, Fuckface"
When the Cowboys put up a strong goal-line stand in the second quarter of tonight's NFL season-opener against the Giants, Dallas defensive coordinator Rob Ryan had some excitedly profane things to say. He also, it appears, had some taunting to do toward the Giants' sideline. (That or he's urging ...

Dez Bryant Thought He Could Fool The Scab Refs Into Ruling This Catch A Touchdown
I've watched this play in HD maybe six or seven times, and it's clear that Dez Bryant is down on the turf in at least three different places (both knees and his right elbow) and perhaps also his left elbow, although it was inconclusive from the replay. Nonetheless, if you thought NFL players were ...

Yep, That's A Big Old "Fuck Y'All I'm From Texas" T-Shirt On The NFL Network
Just less than three hours until the Cowboys and Giants kick off the NFL season, which means the NFL Network's only got three more hours to give us Mike Mayock and LaDainian Tomlinson yammering away, live from a North Jersey parking lot. But take note of that dude in the background, the one who happ...

Why Your Team Sucks 2012: Dallas Cowboys
Some people are fans of the Dallas Cowboys. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Dallas Cowboys. This 2012 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read the other Why Your Team Sucks 2012 previews here....

Dallas Cowboys Pregame Show Host Can't Remember Which Station He Works For
Mickey Spagnola's the NFL-approved beat writer for DallasCowboys.com, and this role calls for him to be an occasional pre-game host during Cowboys broadcasts on local affiliate KTXA....

Jerry Jones Grounds Dez Bryant
Dez Bryant can't go to strip clubs anymore and has to be driven to practice and games by some omnipresent security force. He also has a midnight curfew, unless he tells the Cowboys that he will not be abiding the midnight curfew. With advance notice, of course....

Diamond Dallas Page Invented His Own Style Of Yoga: "If Yoga Is A Bicycle Then DDP Yoga Is A Harley!"
Some days you just have to sit back and thank whoever it is you thank for wonderful things that the internet exists. Here, for you reading pleasure, is professional wrestler Diamond Dallas Page (hereinafter referred to as "DDP") and his new brand of yoga. It is called DDP Yoga....

Jerry Jones Isn't Worried About Replacement Refs, Because There's Still Instant Replay
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Ol' Jer hasn't noticed a difference between the new and old refs anyway....


Richard Bachman Will Wear A Stephen King-Inspired Goalie Mask
It's got to suck to be the Dallas Stars' backup goalie. He'll never be the most famous person named Richard Bachman, even though the guy ahead of him isn't actually named Richard Bachman. But he's embracing it, with this new mask from David Gunnarsson, featuring art from The Shining....

Announcer Says Cowboys WR Cole Beasley Is "Unbeas-lievable," Cole Beasley Vomits
Despite the sickening pun, Cole Beasley finished the game with seven catches for 104 yards. He also threw up a lot. Beasley says it was no big deal, he just got the wind knocked out of him on a hit and he landed on the ball. He also says he throws up a lot....

Woman Who Sat For A While On A Hot Bench Outside Cowboys Stadium Now Suing Jerry Jones
How long were you on this planet before you realized that hot things hurt, and you shouldn't touch them? A few months? A year or two, tops? So when you see a black marble bench, baking in a summer Texas sun on a 101-degree day, maybe you think, hey, it's probably hot, I shouldn't sit there. And even...

Vikings Punter Chris Kluwe Explains Why He Thinks Joey Porter Is "A Frothing Dingleberry"
There was so much goodness in our rollicking Chris Kluwe live chat from the other night that it almost seems unfair to single out just one of Kluwe's responses. But one answer in particular caught my eye and demanded some additional details:...

Jerry Jones: "I Want Me Some Glory Hole"
Hoo fucking boy, this is wonderful. Jerry Jones, while discussing the sense of urgency and pressure of being a Dallas Cowboy, mentioned how he yearns for the glory holes of yesteryear. He's been around 23 years and seen a lot—a lot—and the past few years have left a bad taste in his mouth. Time to ...

Dez Bryant's Mother, To 911: "He Tried To Kill Me"
We've been updating this morning's story about Dez Bryant's arrest for assaulting his mother, but the Dallas Morning News has posted the audio of Angela Bryant's 911 call, and that's worth its own post....
![Dez Bryant May Have Shoved His Own Mother [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17t3p2b6efhphjpg.jpg)
Dez Bryant May Have Shoved His Own Mother [Update]
The Cowboys receiver turned himself in yesterday after police obtained a warrant on a family violence charge. That's all either side is saying right now, but ESPNDallas is reporting that the incident involved Bryant's mother:...

Jaromir Jagr Signs With Dallas Stars, Is Still Old And Not Very Good
Earlier today, Jaromir Jagr—who said on Sunday that 21 teams made him offers— signed a one-year deal with the Dallas Stars. It's worth $4.5 million....