deadspinxy Page 47 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Naked Children In Public: A Deadspin Special Investigation
The night before I got married, my parents hosted a rehearsal dinner at a restaurant in DC. They rented out one of the side rooms for the dinner, and the event room had its own set of bathrooms separate from the restaurant's main pissers. So before the dinner, my dad went into the men's room and pla...
Fun With Boat Names: Suggestive Sexy-Time Edition
Tipster Kishore P. was kind enough to share a photograph taken of this boat, with likely Florida roots, as she was driving along I-90 east between the Lee and Westfield, Mass. exits last weekend....
Hookers And Cosplay And You!
I was at the airport the other day and we were an hour or two early for our flight because I've inherited my mother's paranoia with regards to missing flights. So we're sitting in the terminal with nothing to do when I remember that we walked by an arcade on the way to the gate. So I grab both of my...
Top-Heavy Venezuelan Quasi-Celeb Promises To Pose Nude If Her Team Wins Copa America
Ms. Diosa Canales, the lady you see on the horse above, has decided to rep the Venezuelan national team (La Vinotinto, as we native Venezuelans call it) by agreeing to finally get naked if they win the Copa America. She's got a Twitter account and everything....
More Fun With License Plates: Sketchy "Do Me" Van Is Often Parked Near "NWA" Honda CR-V
Hickey alerted you Saturday to the "Do Me" white van, a New Jersey-based vehicle that undoubtedly has stained shag carpeting....
Deadspin Classic: A Balls Deep Guide To The Fourth Of July
Happy Fourth of July. Since there's not gonna be any football for a long time, how about a Fourth of July Jamboroo from the Balls Deep vault?...
Cockblocked By Waves!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
One Armand De Brignac Midas Bottle For £120,000! An Unscientific Analysis Of An Enormous Johnson's Epic Bar Tab In London
Atlantic City casino scourge Don Johnson (not to be confused with 80s-era TV scourge Don Johnson) must have seen the damage the Bruins did in the MGM Grand bar in Foxwoods recently. He must have burned with envy. For those of you unaware, Don Johnson has earned the dubious moniker of "The Champagne ...
Hunt For Beejoli Shah, Fabulist Author Of Viral "Quentin Tarantino Sucked My Toes!" Story Begins (UPDATE)
So, friendsicles: how many of you had the email from "beejoli" forwarded to you this morning and have subsequently sent it along to others? Dozens, I bet. Thousands even. Dozens of thousands probably. Its veracity is still unknown but I know Gawker is dutifully trying to track down "beejoli" to see ...
What's The Best Way To Clean Up Spooge After Bareback Sex?
Hey, I'm some lady. I'm filling in for that guy you like, who is on vacation, which means that he is most likely drinking rum out of a hollow fruit and riding a horse on a beach somewhere right now (romantic!). Speaking of segueing into talking about horses, my main beef with horses is how fragile t...
You Can Fly Like James Bond In "Thunderball" For The Low, Low Price Of $249
Dave Tuxbury works at a place in the Florida Keys where you can strap on a jetpack like the one Sean Connery used in "Thunderball" and, with the help of 30-foot hoses that use seawater as a propellant, fly like a mechanized falcon. They say it's the only place in the country where one can do this....
Cockblocked By Shrooms!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Miss USA Candidates Attempt To Answer A Question About Evolution, Fail At It
I'll warn you that this video, compiled and edited by the Miami New Times, is uniquely horrific. In it, Miss USA Pageant 2011 contestants attempt to answer — or simply to formulate words in a coherent sentence about the idea proposed — whether or not evolution should be taught in schools. The New ...
136 Bud Lights For Only $680! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Boston Bruins' Epic Bar Tab From Foxwoods
The photo of this receipt is hazy (full version here), and that's how it should be. Mere hours after riding through the streets of Boston in Duck Boats, the Bruins took the Stanley Cup to the MGM Grand at Foxwoods and set to drinking. First came the bottle of Bacardi and 18 sugar free Red Bulls. "Su...
RIP Clarence Clemons
"Clarence Clemons, the saxophonist in Bruce Springsteen's E Street Band, whose jovial onstage manner, soul-rooted style and brotherly relationship with Mr. Springsteen made him one of rock's most beloved sidemen, died Saturday at a hospital in Palm Beach, Fla. He was 69." [New York Times]...
Watch The Marlins Catcher Successfully Throw The Ball At Shane Victorino's Head
Your morning roundup for June 18, the day "propaganda vans touted the importance of stability" in the Jeans Capital of China. (Video H/T, Jimmy Greek)...
What’s It Like To Be Aggressively Licked?
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
The Boob-Showcasing Ukulele Girl Said She'd Return With An Encore If She Got 50K Hits, So Return She Has
When Sarah K. first solicited your assistance back in April, it was in an effort to win $10,000 from some freakish marketing contest in New Zealand. Something called Hitachi, or something....
Holding Farts In And You!
Yesterday, I took my wife's clothes to the dry cleaners, an errand I ran for her without her asking me to do so. And when I do something benevolent like that, I expect full credit and reams of endless praise for being so considerate. So I came home and left the dry cleaning ticket right out in the o...