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Adventures In Accidental Anal Intercourse
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Is Being A Best Man Overrated?
Before we get to the funbagginess, today marks the five-year anniversary of the first blog post I ever wrote....

Guy Narcs On Two Ladies, Dude Threesoming In His Carport
Of all the plot twists in the nine-sentence SeattleCrime.com story, this one tickled my contemplative fancy:...

Scientific Proof Of How To Beat Someone’s Ass At Monopoly
Yesterday a reader and I theorized that the Orange properties were the best monopoly to own in Monopoly. And now a scientician has proven us RIGHT!...

Readers Pick The Best Job Benefits In America
Last week, I asked readers what the greatest free employee benefit in the world was, apart from the "having an actual job" part, which is not to be scoffed at. Here were their responses....

Office Xmas Parties Are The Perfect Time To Run Over A Fire Hydrant
With Christmas just around the corner, it's time to share a few of the stories you folks sent in about your various holiday party failures. LET'S GO....

Your Office Xmas Party Is The Wrong Time To Tell The World’s Most Racist Joke
With Christmas just around the corner, it's time to share a few of the stories you folks sent in about your various holiday party failures. LET'S GO....

Has The President Ever Had Anal?
Oooh, time for my sack full of goodies! Your letters:...

10 Things That Christmas Would Be Better Off Without
Despite indications to the contrary, I love me some Christmas. But like anything, it's not without its faults. So let's get rid of those faults now, shall we?...

Cockblocked By A Ferret!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Send Us Your Holiday Party Horror Stories
For someone who has spent such a large portion of his life drinking and vomiting, I have a shocking deficit of embarrassing holiday party stories. That's where you come in....

The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)
"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below]...

Who Wants To See A Cockatoo Singing That Drowning Pool Song?
We consider this a public service to the five of you who haven't yet seen Lolita the cockatoo singing the WWE classic, "Bodies."...

The Best, Most Deranged Story About Gwar You'll Ever Read
There are band profiles and there are Gwar profiles and then there's this: The first part of J. Bennett's monstrous, satisfyingly disturbing Gwar piece, "Slay Bells," is after the jump, courtesy of Decibel. Prepare for words that haunt....

Indiana Man Selling "Racist Soaps" Doesn't Have Time For "You Politically Correct People"
An Indiana shopkeeper stands accused of selling racist soaps. Gary DeWester, the merchant, says they're "nostalgic" and representative of "American history." He keeps them in his "joke drawer."...

My 2003 Interview With Fred Phelps Of The Westboro Baptist Church
The Westboro Baptist Church will be disrupting the funeral of Elizabeth Edwards this weekend. Here's an interview I did with Pastor Phelps right before he and his church were headed to Pittsburgh to protest poor Mr. Rogers' funeral. [TheMightyBlackTable]...

Cockblocked By Skidmarks!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Fuck You, Charlie Brown
I showed my kid the Charlie Brown Christmas special the other day and she was depressed for the rest of the week. Why are we still subjecting kids to this awful shit?...

CNN Inexplicably Airs <em>Dumb And Dumber</em> Diarrhea Scene
Right after a report on London student protests, there it was: Jeff Daniels loudly evacuating the contents of his bowels. Your move, FOX News....