detroit Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lions Fans: Not Even Fit For The Bus
Hard to think of a more fitting metaphor for the Detroit Lions' season than the video below: A poor, stupid Lions fan is kicked off of a bus, and is mocked by the other passengers. Poor, dumb sap. The most hilarious part to me is his final, desperate act of defiance as the vehicle pulls away. Ha. Cl...
The Audacity Of Hope
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap With the economy in a tailspin and Congress ignoring the auto industry's bailout pleas, it seems only fitting that this is the year that the Lions make their most serious push towar...
0-16 Is Upon Us. Jamboroo, Week 11, Featuring King Diamond, Poop, And Mongolian Wok
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs, well, every Thursday afternoon during the NFL season. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available RIGHT FUCKING NOW in stores and online here. You can email Drew here. Read him during the week at KSK. The...
Red Wings Fan Attempts To Jinx Penguins With Lions Shirt; Results Predictable
Red Wings fan Rick Finn here decided his team needed a little something extra going into last night's showdown with the Penguins, so he hatched an ingenious plan. He had an opportunity to pose with the Stanley Cup in Traverse City, Mich., on Labor Day, and decided to try and put a hex on Sidney Cros...
Allen Iverson Traded: The Day After
So Allen Iverson is now a Piston. And Chauncey Billiups is heading back to Colorado. And the world now knows the name Cheikh Samb. But what does it mean for Detroit, Denver, Antonio McDyess and the rest of the NBA? Detailed analysis, educated guesses, wild speculation and whatever the hell Woody Pai...
Allen Iverson On His Way To Detroit
The Detroit Pistons are this close (imagine my thumb and index fingers very near to each other) to trading Chauncey Billiups, Antonio McDyess and Cheikh Samb to the Denver Nuggets for Allen Iverson. The Detroit News was first on this, and others are now saying that the deal has been agreed to in pri...
Favre-Packers Divorce Is Getting Downright Messy
So do you have a problem that you would like Brett Favre to solve? Girlfriend trouble? Confused about which laundry detergent to buy? Hang by your phone, and Brett will be with you momentarily. But first he has to solve the problems of the NFL, like advising Tony Romo on whether or not he should pla...
Detroit Lions Still Finding New And Impressive Ways To Lose
Two games after getting rid of the The GM Who Shall Not Be Named, Detroit found itself on the verge of its first and possibly only win of the season against the Minnesota Vikings. The defense had kept the opposition under thirty for the first time all season and backup QB "Dandy" Dan Orlovsky had be...
30 Previews In 30 Days: The Detroit Pistons
NBA training camps have begun; the season is rapidly approaching. Can you dig it? I knew that you could. And so we continue our previews: 30 of them in 30 days. Up next is a team that has become the NBA's perennial bridesmaid: The Detroit Pistons.When last we saw them: Finished 59-23, first in the C...
Detroit Tigers' Season Cruelly Refuses To End
Despite what the calendar says, the Detroit Tigers called off their season weeks ago. They've won 5 games this month. They've lost 12 of their last 13, given six in a row to the Indians and Royals, their closer has already retired, Gary Sheffield is sharpening knives in his basement, and despite leg...
Celebrating the End Of The Millen-ium
Of all the Matt Millen farewell "tributes" we've come across this morning, Tirico Suave's video compilation, shown immediately following the jump, has to be the most intricate and heartfelt (make sure the volume is turned down if you're at work). Featuring not one, but two clips from Glengarry Glen ...
Matt Millen: Lonely Man With A Lawnmower
After a few hours of cautious speculation about Matt Millen's removal, it was finally revealed that Detroit Lions' owner William Clay Ford did actually have to fire him in the early hours of Tuesday morning. The Detroit Free Press has a surprisingly mesmerizing photo retrospective titled "The Matt M...
Fire Millen Finally Becomes Reality; But Now What, Lions Fans?
Every legendary movement begins with one daring act of civil disobedience. As close as I can tell, the Fire Millen phenomenon began one crisp December day in 2005, when a fan was manhandled by stadium security for brandishing a "Fire Millen" sign during a home game with Minnesota. Had Lions official...
The Matt Millen Era Mercifully Ends In Detroit
It appears Bill Ford Jr.'s comments from a couple days ago were either not-so-subtle foreshadowing or they were taken under consideration by those who do have authority, because according to Fox Sports' Jay Glazer, Matt Millen, the Detroit Lions oft-criticized president and general manager, is offic...
Matt Millen Gets Overwhelming Lack of Confidence Vote From Lions' Brass
It appears some of the Lions ownership family has its own collection of "Fire Millen" brown paper bag masks and is about to start wearing them in public if things don't turn around for Detroit's woeful football team. William Ford Jr., son of Lions' principle owner William Clay Ford and vice chairman...
Gary Sheffield; No Saner Now Than He Was On Friday
As Gary Sheffield held a large steak to his aching melon over the weekend, Bob Watson, the Major League Baseball official in charge of on-field discipline, confirmed that he will review video of Friday's brawl between the Tigers and Cleveland Indians to levy possible fines and/or suspensions. Meanwh...
Shaun Alexander, Cedric Benson Both Seeking Reclamation Project Status In Detroit
How bad has it been for the former NFL MVP and the former drunk boater? The Lions are bringing both running backs in for workouts now. Okay, well, that's not so bad. Both guys have a chance to sign with an NFL team, right? Not so much. Why not? According to MLive: "A signing of any player is not im...
Tatum Bell Declares Innocence While Suspiciously Wearing Rudi Johnson's Underwear
Yep, this is EXACTLY what the Lions needed. Our story so far: Rudi Johnson arrived at Lions headquarters on Monday to make a deal to become their backup running back, when his two large Gucci dufflebags were stolen from outside of CEO Matt Millen's office. Video surveillance cameras revealed that it...
Note To Self: Do Not Let Tatum Bell Check My Luggage
Running back Rudi Johnson had no sooner arrived in Detroit on Monday than he lost his luggage; not at the airport like God intended, but outside of CEO Matt Millen's office in the Detroit Lions locker room. While Johnson was in Millen's office working out details of a one-year deal with the team, he...
NFL Season Preview: The Detroit Lions
We're less than a month away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. This year, the previews w...