dick-and-balls Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Orioles' Chance Sisco Capped Off A Bad Inning With A Foul Tip To The Dick And Balls
A wise person online once said, “Each day on twitter there is one main character. The goal is to never be it.” Such a quote can also be applied to the Baltimore Orioles this season. As a whole, the team has been a special kind of terrible that few people have ever seen before in their lives. Yet at ...
Ben Simmons Gets Away With Elbowing Kyle Lowry In The Dick And Balls
This is some dirty stuff right here. In the second quarter of Thursday night’s Game 3 in the 76ers-Raptors series, Kyle Lowry boxed out Ben Simmons on the defensive glass, and Simmons toppled to the floor along the baseline. With Lowry teetering over him, Simmons threw an angry elbow directly to Low...
Sharks' Logan Couture Is Thankful He Didn't Lose A Testicle When A Hockey Puck Hit Him In The Dick And Balls
Down 4-3 in the second period, the San Jose Sharks had an opportunity to tie up the game when they were awarded a power play. But as the countdown clock for the penalty reached its final 30 seconds, it was Vegas that would end up with the goal-scoring opportunity. Reilly Smith passed the puck from t...
Universe Rewards Home Plate Umpire For Defending His Crew Mate By Directing A Fastball Into His Junk
This delightful baseball sequence begins with Cardinals third baseman Matt Carpenter leading off the top of the 11th inning against Pirates hurler Steven Brault. With the count at 2–2, Brault threw a breaking pitch down and away, and Carpenter appeared to check his swing. Third base umpire Jordan Ba...
Charlton Fan Accidentally Kicks His Own Team's Player In The Dick And Balls Trying To Celebrate Game-Winning Goal
In the 93rd minute of the match between Charlton Athletic and Accrington Stanley, the linesman awarded a penalty to Charlton after a shot from midfielder Ben Reeves ricocheted off the hand of a defender in the penalty box. Karlan Grant calmly scored from the spot and the players were understandably ...
Report: Nick Young Stole Man's Phone And Hit Him In The Dick And Balls At A Car Wash
Nick Young’s lone NBA action this season was a four-game cup of coffee with the Nuggets. He scored nine points and got waived shortly before the new year, though it appears he’s still getting shots up....
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
Happy new year, one and all. This year, resolve to take better care of your dick and balls; last year you did a really bad job of it....
More Than You Probably Wanted To Know About The Rules On A Puck Hitting A Ref's Dick And Balls
Just an excellent hockey highlight from Tuesday’s 4-3 Blues win over the Panthers, as St. Louis defenseman Robert Bortuzzo—fresh off of beating the hell out of a teammate in practice—tried to dump in a puck and ended up banking it off of referee Tim Peel’s biscuits, past goalie Roberto Luongo, and i...
Goal Disallowed After Puck Ricochets Off Unfortunate Referee's Dick And Balls
The Florida Panthers are up on the St. Louis Blues by the score of 1–0 in the second period Tuesday night. The score looked for a moment like it would be tied at one goal apiece, after Blues defenseman Robert Bortuzzo beat Roberto Luongo in, um, unconventional fashion:...
![Henry Anderson's Dick And Balls Rudely Squished By Cordarrelle Patterson [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ixehh9mgwgbeldk2uzsj.gif)
Henry Anderson's Dick And Balls Rudely Squished By Cordarrelle Patterson [Update]
Cordarrelle Patterson was brought down by Henry Anderson after a one-yard gain on a first-and-five run early in the fourth quarter of Sunday’s Patriots-Jets tilt. Patterson, who I think it will henceforth be fair to assume is a total sociopath, expressed his displeasure with that turn of events by c...
Chris Simms Recalls The Time Vince Wilfork Busted Up His Genitals Real Good
Former NFL quarterback Chris Simms, who famously got his spleen exploded during a game, went on Mike Florio’s radio show today and shared the story of a different time in which he was grievously and spectacular injured by a big hit....
Iowa's Mascot Got Rocked In The Beans By An Errant Pass
Saturday’s visit to Penn State started a lot better than it finished for the Iowa Hawkeyes. It ended with a 30-24 defeat and a stumble back into the pack in the Big Ten West standings, but it started with a first quarter that featured a blocked punt that became a safety, a fantastic touchdown pass t...
Game 163 Is One More Chance For A Catcher To Take One To The Dick And Balls
The first tiebreaker baseball game of the day has been highly entertaining, with the Brewers and Cubs locked in a pitchers’ duel all afternoon. But we all know an extra game is just a chance for one of the best baseball plays: A catcher getting hit in the dick and balls....
Chip The Buffalo Destroyed His Dick And Balls With A T-Shirt Cannon<em></em>
No point in keeping you waiting for this one—on Saturday, Chip the Buffalo, Colorado’s sideline mascot, blasted his dick and balls with damn t-shirt cannon and by the grace of God, someone had their phone out to film the vicious neutering of what was once a happy-go-lucky creature....
José Abreu Needed Emergency Surgery To Save A "Strangled" Testicle
White Sox first baseman José Abreu hasn’t played in a couple weeks, a result of an ambiguous outpatient “lower abdominal surgery” he reportedly underwent on August 20. Hernioplasty? Appendectomy? A testicle that twisted around and became tangled up in its own [passes out cold]:...
UFC Fighter Bryce Mitchell Drilled His Nuts Apart
“So i was gunna train today but i ripped my nutsack in half,” begins a Homeric Facebook post by UFC featherweight Bryce Mitchell. This is the “A screaming comes across the sky” of our time. ...
The Mariners, And Their Fans, Have Had A Bad Few Weeks
What you are looking at here is a Mariners fan fucking up, just as the M’s have been doing for the past several weeks now. The team, though still 18 games above .500, has recently slipped to 2.5 games behind the A’s for the second wild card spot. This is despite the fact that, as late as June 16, th...
Pole Vaulter Nearly Makes Shish Kebab Of His Dick And Balls
At the IAAF Rabat Diamond League track meet in Morocco today, pole vaulter Timur Morgunov’s pole skewered the front of his shorts. His dangly bits narrowly and luckily remained intact....
The Sound When These Two Men Smash Their Dicks And Balls Together Will Stay With You Long Into The Night
This happened in the seventh inning of Saturday’s Mariners-Rays game, with a runner on first and the Rays holding a 6-3 lead. It was a clutch, inning-ending grab, but it came with great, great sacrifice:...