dor Page 79 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Every Last Player And Coach Got Red Carded In A Single Soccer Match In Argentina
Quite a bit of scrapping went down in a recent Argentinian lower-level soccer match between Claypole and Victoriano Arenas. So much scrapping that referee Damien Rubino issued 36 red cards. One was for bad behavior during the halftime break....

Chelsea Owner Roman Abramovich Relieved To Still Have The World's Biggest Symbolic Penis
Thought we couldn't put a sports spin on the recent revelation that Teodoro Nguema Obiang Mangue, the son of the dictator of Equatorial Guinea, had commissioned a yacht with a movie theater on board? Wrong....

Reporter With Giant Balls Breaks Up Street Fight
Gonzo journalism at its finest, as Seattle reporter Shomari Stone stumbles across the beginning of a fight on Seattle's waterfront as he's filming his standup. Stone jumps in and stops the fight, something that pansy Murrow never would have done....

The Naked Sledding Contest Was Just Held In Germany (NSFW)
According to the organizers of the "Naked Sledging Contest" in Braunlage, Germany, more than 400 people wanted to compete, but only 26 were permitted to do so. Competitors stripped near-nude and vied for a £1,000 prize by traveling a "90 metre long iced snowy piste." Decent coin, but earning the ti...

Vanderbilt Mascot Punches Vanderbilt Fan, Bloodying His Nose
Vandy's mascot "Mr. C" went after one of his own fans before yesterday's loss to Tennessee. Local news tried to make the excuse that he was overzealous, or perhaps couldn't see out of the oversized foam head, but our tipster relays that the bloody student had grabbed Mr. C's junk during a crowd su...

The Drunken Family Argument Phase Of "Black Thanksgiving"
We learned last week, the NBA All-Star Weekend is "Black Thanksgiving." Of course, like any holiday with family present, things can turn ugly between the meal and dessert....

Let's Watch A Cafeteria Brawl Together
This film is called "ASU Cafe Fight (Mobile vs Football Team)." Which could be either Alabama State University, Arizona State University, Appalachian State University, Angelo State University or other....

At Denny's, They Will Clean Your Table While You Continue Brawling (NSFW) (UPDATED)
UPDATE: Well, the original video was taken down overnight for YouTube service-terms violations. Thankfully, someone else was taping. And double thankfully, syrup appears to be involved in the impetus. (H/T Dylan for the extended remix version.)...

The Real Ronaldo Decides To Call It A Day
The Spoiler was just a whipper-snapper when Ronaldo first came to our attention and he absolutely blew our tiny little mind. He was unbelievably strong, quick and skilful — he's what Jonah Lomu could've been if he'd not lived in New Zealand and made the right life choices....

The Most Pirates Story Ever: Pittsburgh Loses Arbitration Case Against 1-11 Pitcher
Yeah, we know arbitration is about more than one isolated season, and Ross Ohlendorf is better than that record would suggest. Still, this doesn't happen to any other team. [Post-Gazette]...

Here's The Director's Cut Video Of A Brawl At Chuck E. Cheese's
Seizing the momentum from the Orangeburg (SC) "I Ride The Ride" brawl, tipster John C. forwarded what he deemed "epic" footage of some fisticuffs at the Beaumont, Texas Chuck E. Cheese....

Swimmer From Poland Strips For Playboy (Borderline NSFW)
Luiza Hryniewicz, 21-year-old Junior European swimming champion, will appear in next month's Playboy. Luiza seems to have enjoyed stripping....

Here's Some Nut-Grabbing Video From Last Night's Knicks/Hawks Fights
Near the end of last night's 111-102 Atlanta Hawks win over the New York Knicks, Hawks forward Marvin Williams and Knicks forward Shawne Williams got ejected for fisticuffing. You can see it here:...

Hubristic Schadenfreude: Guy In Tapout Shirt Gets Floored
Remember, just because you buy the shirt, doesn't make you an MMA fighter. Or in this kid's case, maybe it gives him Keith Jardine's glass jaw....

Could This IHOP Brawl Put "I Ride The Ride" On The Catch-Phrase Map? (NSFW)
There's a lot going on in this two-minute piece of artistry from the IHOP in Orangeburg, S.C. on Saturday. Drinks being thrown. Canes being swung. Gibberish being yelled. And, a chilling effect being felt....

Football Writers Of America Feverishly Honing Their Wittiest "Troy vs. Clay" Hair Puns
Clay Matthews signed a one-year endorsement deal today. It's with Unilever's Suave brand. Matthews' "marketing agent" Ryan Williams said it involves pre- and post-Super Bowl appearances. And a whole lot of groovy questions about Troy Polamalu's mane as well....

Jewish Hockey Player Sues Anaheim Ducks Alleging Anti-Semitic Harassment
Jason Bailey signed a three-year contract with the Ducks organization in 2008. They assigned him to play for the minor league Bakersfield Condors where, he claimed in a lawsuit filed Tuesday, he "was subject to severe and/or pervasive harassment."...

D.C. Woman Commits Her Life To Hiding Bras
Here's a very special report about a garment that employs special buttons to prevent the bra-exposing "blouse gape" scourge. What inspired the "inventor"? Picking out proper wardrobe to work at a lobbying firm....

Knock-Off American Sports Apparel In Bangladesh Is Magnificent
Photographer Jason Miklian is working in the Dhaka and captured a young man wearing this insane sweatshirt, which brilliantly encompasses how some cultures interpret America's fashion sense when it comes to team gear....

The World's First Compelling Sideline Interview, Courtesy Kim Clijsters And Her Suspicious Cleavage
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....