drunk Page 17 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The A's Postgame Celebration Featured A Beer-Drinkin' Baby
For the second year in a row, the Oakland A's have shocked everyone by capturing the AL West title. The team celebrated after clinching the division with an 11-7 victory over the Twins last night (the Rangers helped out by losing 4-0 to the Royals), and everybody had a good time. ...
A Fan Fell To His Death At The 49ers Game
The frightening trend of fans falling to their deaths at sporting events continues. According to police, a fan fell from an elevated walkway and died at Candlestick Park shortly after the Packers-49ers game kicked off on Sunday. ...
Hey, Alleged Adult: Stop Playing Drinking Games
I trust you've heard that school starts right this very instant or at least soon or perhaps recently. Are you ready? Have you bought and thought all the right things relating to educational electronics and the passage of time? Do you have a bushel of new underwear and an inflated sense of self-worth...
How To Pair Wine With Food: A Guide For Ordinary Drunkards
"Ew, I wouldn't date him. He's a Sauvignon blanc drinker!"...
Alleged Female Idiot On The Field Blows .341 BAC, Has Amazing Twitter
An Idiot on the Field might have made history for being the drunkest Idiot ever recorded as she allegedly tried to jump onto the field during Saturday's Northern Illinois-Iowa game in Iowa City....
Will Drinking 28 Non-Alcoholic Beers In An Hour Make Me Drunk?
Back in April, competitive eater and world champion burper Tim "Eater X" Janus contacted us with an idea for "a very cool stunt that I'd like to have documented by a reputable news outlet."...
How To Make A Decent Goddamn Margarita, For Once
People avoid all sorts of boozes for all sorts of reasons. Maybe you're too broke for Scotch or too smug for vodka. Maybe beer bloats and disappoints you. Perhaps the smell of bourbon reminds you of Grandpa's special beatin' shoe. Or maybe you're like I used to be, and you associate tequila with fr...
Drunk Cardinals Fan Tries To Kick Cubs Fan, Falls On Own Head Instead
According to the YouTube uploader, this happened Friday outside Wrigley, sometime after the Cubs actually won the first game of the teams' weekend series. Related: Has anyone talked to Will Leitch since Friday?...
How To Drink Champagne Without Becoming Even More Broke Than Usual
Let me begin with an uninformed and yet almost certainly accurate assumption: you drink champagne at most twice a year, one of which is the perfunctory glass on New Year's Eve that you end up blaming for your hangover the next morning instead of the 14 Red Bull vodkas you blasted between 1 and 3 a.m...
Sure, Let's Watch A Guy Get Kicked In The Nuts 10 Times And Not Flinch
Stop me if you've heard this one before: Guy walks up to two bros outside of a bar and dares them to kick him in the nuts 10 times in a row. "If I flinch at all, I'll give you $25," he tells them. Haven't heard that one? Then go ahead and watch the video above. If you want to skip over the bargaini...
How To Drink At Weddings Without Making An Ass Of Yourself
I'm going to a wedding in Delaware in a few weeks, because aren't we all. I was very excited about this adventure when I thought Delaware was in the South—I've never been to the South—but it turns out Delaware's just off to the right of Maryland. So now I'm merely regular excited, because even thoug...
36 Cheap American Beers, Ranked
I realize you're going to spend Independence Day happily drinking whatever cold beer you're served, because you're polite and you're an alcoholic. And I trust you'll have a fine old time no matter what you drink. But that doesn't mean America's shitbrews are all the same. The list below breaks down...
Saints Receiver Joe Morgan Busted For Alleged DWI
The Earhart Expressway is a pretty damned busy highway. It's three lanes in either direction, and runs from New Orleans to the suburbs, and sometimes a Saints receiver passes out in his car in the middle of the road on a Saturday night....
Hey, It's Drunk Wayne Gretzky!
The greatest hockey player of all time has a drunk face to match....
Drunk Ump Passes Out On Field, Tries To Fight Medics, Is Arrested
A 49-year-old high school umpire, who witnesses say was "visibly under the influence," is in custody in an Illinois jail after he passed out on the field of a baseball game he was actively umpiring last Friday....
Your Heart Will Be Warmed By This Canadian Drunkard's Obituary
Alvin Cote of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, died of pneumonia on April 19th at the age of 59. He is being fondly remembered by those who knew him best: the police officers who arrested him over 1,000 times for public drunkenness....
This Is What A Shitfaced Tiger Woods Looks Like
Tiger Woods went to the Met Gala with his new girlfriend, Olympic skier Lindsay Vonn, on Monday night. Apparently, he got completely wasted while he was there....
Todd Helton Reportedly Got His DUI While On A Drunken Lotto Ticket Run
Yesterday, we learned about Rockies first baseman Todd Helton's DUI arrest and were treated to his I-am-too-drunk-for-pictures-right-now mugshot, but specific details were sparse. We knew that Helton was arrested a few blocks from his house at 2:39 a.m., but that was about it. Thanks to TMZ, which ...
Todd Helton Got A DUI This Morning And Posed For An Unfortunate Mugshot
Colorado Rockies first baseman Todd Helton was arrested early this morning for driving under the influence of alcohol in Thornton, Colo. According to police, Helton was pulled over a few blocks away from his home at 2:39 a.m. Helton just released a statement on the incident, via the Denver Post:...
49ers Tight End Delanie Walker's Aunt And Uncle Were Killed By A Drunk Driver The Morning After The Super Bowl
Earlier this morning, Delanie Walker sent out the following tweet:...