eichel - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Florida Panthers get their sharp ends back
Most want to attribute some kind of special potion or Cornwallis-like strategy cooked up by coach Paul Maurice and GM Bill Zito to explain the Florida Panthers’ success. After all, there has to be something mystical that got the lowest-seeded team to the Stanley Cup Final. But it isn’t that hard. Ma...
Newsmax's Greg Kelly claims there's 'nothing gay' about baseball, which he clearly doesn’t watch
I can’t even claim to really know what Newsmax is, other than it has a name that sounds like something a satire show would come up with to spoof an enclosure of right-wing baboons throwing various feces at each other and the camera and the real thing being actually far more ridiculous than any spoof...
The Stanley Cup will be lifted by the Oilers-Golden Knights victor
Among a final eight that feels like a changing of the guard in hockey more than most years, with old standbys proving their age by exiting the ice until the fall, the duo of the Las Vegas Golden Knights and the Edmonton Oilers stand out like a sore thumb. Not necessarily because they don’t also repr...
When did the NBA playoffs become the NHL playoffs?
The first round of the NBA playoffs usually isn’t all that good, which doesn’t stop people from complaining about it. The difference between the top seeds and lower seeds is large enough that those series should result in nothing more than dress rehearsals for the true powers and the later rounds. W...
The NHL Playoffs Attention Meter
It’s that time again. When the loudest and most obnoxious guy in the bar tells you it’s the best time in sports, the NHL Playoffs. There will be a few tweets coming across your timeline that say something that has some combination of puking and snorting coke together, and they’re likely about watchi...
Connor McDavid isn’t going to get a better chance
Every generationally great player, or every player that can safely say they’re one of the five best of all time, eventually bores the public with their greatness. Or at least fails to spike the EKG when news of their latest heroics crosses the wires. Connor McDavid is there. ...
World Cup 2022 Preview: Group D — Can Denmark be the midnight bomber what bombs at midnight?
If you ascribe to the theory that this will be a truly goofy World Cup — that the short run-up, the injuries everywhere (not clear the amount of injured is all that abnormal but let’s go with it), the odd setting — and that some team from out of nowhere could make a run, you’re probably sizing up yo...
This is all Jack Eichel has
It’s not that the relationship between Jack Eichel and Buffalo Sabres fans will ever be good. Their union promised too much and delivered so little that there should be bitterness on both sides. The No. 2 pick the Sabres sold out for didn’t deliver them from the wilderness that they’ve been stuck in...
The Buffalo Sabres are… fun? Is that what this says here? That can’t be right
You know you’ve gotten things unfathomably wrong for an unfathomably long time when you are held up as an example of why teams in any sport shouldn’t rebuild. That was always the call when a GM was threatening to tear it down from paranoid fans and media alike. “Look at the Buffalo Sabres! They’ve b...
A Knights' fail
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Look at these dumb fuckers! They’re $10 million over the salary cap and still couldn’t finish in the top three of a division full of fuckwits and bindle-carriers! They couldn’t finish ahead of the Kings! The Kings who are led by Anze Kopitar and Drew Doughty, whose tires are so bald t...
Maybe Jack Eichel just isn’t that guy
If you’re trying to blow your own face off and fall down a sewer for comedic effect instead of securing a playoff spot, you’d have to give the Vegas Golden Knights an Emmy for their performance last night. Needing just about every point they can get to pass the Dallas Stars for the last wildcard spo...
The Golden Knights are running out of racetrack
Normally, a team five seasons out from its creation fighting for a playoff spot would be a mark of success. They’ve built and grown over four years, taken their lumps, accrued draft picks and developed their own, and were starting to see the first signs of something real. But nothing is normal about...