eli Page 165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jose Lima Returns For Another Go Around
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Getting To The Bottom Of The Lingerie Football League
It's time for Waxing Off, the only Internet feature to turn down federal stimulus bailout money. This week's topic: The scourge of the Lingerie Football League....

It Appears Bob Knight Has Been Sitting Too Close To Bob Ryan
So that's it for the first 75% of today's NCAA not-so-craziness. Sussman told me can't type any sentence that doesn't fit onto a bingo card and he's beginning to hallucinate....

Duke Haters: Stop Calling Blue Devils Gay
Much like the Yankees and the Cowboys, Duke's basketball program is an easy target for collective hate. One writer accepts this, but she's disturbed by the rampant homphobia that comes with it....

This Here's What You Call A "Danwich"
I love this photo. The expression on Dan Patrick's face, with an Andrews sister on each arm, just seems to scream, "Hey, E.A. Fanboys — SUCK ON THIS ACTION."...

Young Steve Downie's Crazy Head
So here's a story that will interest only a handful of hockey geeks out there, but I'm going to talk about it anyway. It's about consummate shit-stirrer Steve Downie....

Jay Mariotti Calls Shenanigans On Matt Cassel Trade
Gentleman Jay Mariotti knows a raw deal when he sees one and something about that Matt Cassel to Kansas City trade does not smell right to him....

The Real Reason For Jeff Reed's Towel Tantrum
I know the idea of Jeff Reed, drunk in a gas station bathroom at 3:00 a.m. sounds improbable, but there was actually a very good reason for it. He was paid to do it!...

Andy Phillips Assures Everyone That He's Not The Carl Pavano/Greg Dobbs/John Cena Impersonator
"Anyone who knows me knows I would never have been involved in anything remotely close to something like that." [Pirates Report]...

Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report
You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie....

Andy Phillips And The Bizarre Porn Star Police Report
Former Yankee prospect Andy Phillips is considered one of the nicest family men in all of baseball by other writers and his peers. So why has an adult actress filed a police report against him?...

It's Not Traveling Unless Duke Says It's Traveling
I don't understand why people think that Duke gets special treatment in the college basketball world. Are they trying to say that another school wouldn't get way with 12 steps between each dribble?...

World's Oldest JuCo Player Declared Ineligible
The strange tale of Ken Mink, the 73-year-old college basketball player, took an odd turn as he was recently declared ineligible—and, strangely enough, it wasn't because he is a 73-year-old man playing college basketball....

Visa Granted To Israeli Tennis Player (No, The Other One)
Do you still smell the big stink that was raised when Israeli WTA player Shahar Pe'er was denied entry to Dubai? Well, everyone in the Middle East is happy again!...

It's Official: Baseball Is Worse Than Professional Wrestling
Well, that's if you listen to former Minnesota Governor and feather-boa'd wrestler, Jesse "The Body" Ventura, who wondered why the Feds aren't going after Bud Selig like they did Vince McMahon....

Tennis Channel Stands Up To Dubai
The Tennis Channel will not broadcast the Dubai tourney because of Shahar Peer's denied visa, which means I may never know if the Tennis Channel is actually in my cable package. [ESPN]...

Bud Selig: It's Not My Fault
The day before Alex Rodriguez makes his first Spring Training appearance, commissioner Bud Selig went on the record with Newsday to remind everyone that none of this steroid business could possibly be his fault....

Hank Aaron Doesn't Want the Homerun Record Back
Sorry, Bud Selig: "If you did that, you'd have to go back and change all kinds of records, and the [home run] record was very important to me," Aaron said. "It's probably the most hallowed record out there, as far as I'm concerned, but it's now in the hands of somebody else. It belongs to Barry. No ...

Milwaukee Admirals To Host 'Don't Be Like Mike Night'
"Anyone named Michael, Phelps, Mary Jane, Cheech, Chong, Weed (Wied) or anyone who has won an Olympic Gold Medal can get their ticket for only $2." [Milwaukee Admirals]...