eli Page 169 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Elijah Dukes Is Not Subtle About Voice Mail
Tampa Bay Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is off to a splendid start this year, and just watching him play, you can tell he has superstar potential. Hell ... he could very well be the next Brett Myers!...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while hiding from the flying robot police ... • MLB: New York Mets at Atlanta. The most humid rivalry in sports. [TBS] • NBA: Draft lottery, at Secaucus, N.J.; Western Conference finals, Utah at San Antonio, Game 2. You know which one you care about watching more. [ESPN] • NHL: Western...
About Last Night ...
What you missed during another senseless school squirrel attack ... • NBA: That clanking sound you hear is the Warriors going down 2-0 to the Jazz. • MLB: Dice, Dice Baby ... Manny, Matsuzaka lead Red Sox over Blue Jays, 9-3. • Tennis: The Chronicles of Roddick ... big fun at the Rome Masters....
Vernon Wells Loves Interacting With His Fans
By now, you might have heard about Vernon Wells signing a baseball for a fan who was heckling him. It's really one of our favorite stories in a while, because it shows a sense of humor from Wells — it was his idea — and it includes a Major League Baseball starting off signing a baseball with the wor...
Bruce Willis Likes Him Some Jersey Beer
We are sad to report to Action Movie Star Bruce Willis that just because the television station interviewing you is Canadian doesn't mean you can't start throwing out your handy R-rated movie catchphrases, no matter how blasted you are....
Mnookin: Another Crazed Night At Fenway
Last night, Fenway Park came alive once again, in that weird, psychotic way that only Fenway Park can come alive. Even though it turned out to be the King Felix show, it still had the feel of a historic night ... well, for April, anyway....
Michael Irvin, Assaulting Contractors
We haven't had a good Michael Irvin story in a while, and, frankly, we've missed him. (He's John Rocker's buddy, after all.) Anyway, this is a relatively minor key for him, but we've been so forlorn without him that we're including it, regardless: Irvin has been accused of assaulting a contractor....
This Can't Turn Out Well For Anyone
OK, this is no laughing matter, but Wolverine Nation can't be happy that when this 35-year-old man went out to meet a "kid" he met on the Internet, he decided to wear his lucky Michigan cap. Next to "First down, Troy Smith," the next phrase a Michigan fan does not want to hear is "Hi, I'm Chris Hans...
How Bud And Company Are Justifying Keeping Games From You
OK, so here's where everything stands with the Major League Baseball / DirectTV / Extra Innings deal from yesterday. Richard Sandomir has the scoop in The New York Times....
MLB Pretends It Cares, A Little, Barely
So, if you buy what Major League Baseball is spinning, yesterday's announcement that the Direct TV wouldn't necessarily be an exclusive deal is great news, a chance for fans to still watch their favorite out-of-town team without having to buy stupid DirectTV. After all, cable providers have until th...
Eli Manning, Wayne Palmer: Same Guy
We're big fans of the television show "24," mainly because we love torture and can't quite believe Kiefer Sutherland somehow became tough as he got older. (We also have a serious crush on Chloe.) We're not exactly sold on this season, however, mainly because we refuse to believe a simpering wimp lik...
Bud Selig Is Trying Very Hard To Tolerate Your Bitching
Bug Selig, rebel bad-ass that he is, is taking a little bit of a contentious stance against the backlash towards the MLB's exclusive deal with DirecTV. He referred to it as "a slight controversy, in some places," and he believes that the solution is for you to get off your broke ass and buy yourself...
A Sad, Base, Disgusting Poll, And We, Frankly, Are Ashamed Of You
We continue to feel bad for attractive female sideline reporters. They work hard, they travel like crazy, they put in the hours ... and no matter what they do, all they ever receive for their efforts is "ooh, boobies!" It has to be frustrating, and we do our best to rise above it around here....
Goodbye, Playmaker
As The Mighty MJD mentioned yesterday, it's official: Michael Irvin is out at ESPN. We're not sure what more we can say about this; we're so sad to see him go, even if the beleaguered closed captioning typists over there don't feel the same way....
Requiem For The Playmaker
As you've probably heard by now — in fact, it's the reason you've been holding a candlelight vigil — Michael Irvin has been let go from ESPN. Perhaps surprisingly, It's not for any scandalous reasons... his contract was up, and ESPN opted not to renew it. The Playmaker's stay at ESPN, just like that...
Could We Be In Danger Of Losing Michael Irvin?
The New York Post, which is never ever wrong, tosses out some potentially fun Michael Irvin/ESPN gossip this morning....
Eli Manning Has A Hard Time Meeting Girls
We don't listen to the radio much — we're too busy with Meat Loaf and REO Speedwagon on an endless iPod loop — so we missed this little tidbit from the Opie and Anthony "show." Some guy named Jason Itzler, who used to run the NY Confidential "escort" service, was a guest on the show, and the hosts a...
The Bear Had No Use For Sideline Reporters
The more I watch this, the more I laugh. That's legendary Alabama coach Paul "Bear" Bryant, just barely stopping short of saying something like, "Look, you stupid bitch." Today's coaches (for the most part) are too publicly polite to embarrass a sideline reporter by pointing out the absurdity of the...
Michael Irvin, Unplugged
Here's the Michael Irvin speech that I promised earlier ... just a few highlights that could be considered ironic, but for the most part, it's actually quite endearing. It's a heartfelt speech, and, to the best of my knowledge, the first time that Bishop T.D. Jakes was mentioned at a Pro Football Ha...
The Hall Of Fame Is Going To Need A Champagne Room
This one's going to be tough for Redskins fans to swallow. Michael Irvin, in his third year of eligibility, is going to be inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. He was one of six players selected for Hall induction today, along with Gene Hickerson, Bruce Matthews, Charlie Sanders, Thurman Tho...