eli Page 82 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is Boston's Chance To Get Anthony Davis, As Long As They Don't Fuck It Up
Annoyingly, the vile Boston Celtics might get what they wanted after all. While the draft lottery ended in the most frustrating fashion for every team involved except New Orleans, the Boston brain trust had to be ecstatic to see the main Anthony Davis trade asset (Zion Williamson) off the board. Tho...
If The Pelicans Don't Deserve Zion Williamson, Every Other Team Deserves Him Less
When the New Orleans Pelicans landed the right to seize the beginning of Zion Williamson’s basketball career, the reaction was swift, predictable and consistent: “What did those people do to deserve such a prize?”...
The NBA Would've Been Better Off Rigging The Draft Lottery
The NBA’s new odds format did the job of scrambling the draft order. Four teams played especially horrendous basketball last season, and of those four teams, three were bounced out of the draft’s top four selections. This was satisfying. The Cavaliers, represented by Nick Gilbert, dropped to fifth,...
Zion Williamson Is The Pelicans' Reward For Wasting Anthony Davis
The Knicks, Pelicans, Grizzlies, and Lakers all had a shot at Zion Williamson heading into the final reveals of the NBA Draft Lottery, and the sensational Duke forward might have gotten stuck in the most disastrous possible situation. The New Orleans Pelicans—who had a six percent chance of winning ...
WWE Is Getting Back At The Revival for Wanting Out, And It Isn't Working
On this week’s edition of WWE’s flagship television program, Monday Night Raw, viewers were treated to a segment in which the tag team The Usos, theoretically the good guys, revealed that they had invented “Ucy Hot,” their own sweat-activated version of Icy Hot, and secretly deployed it to the trunk...
Georgia Sprinter Miraculously Survives After A Javelin Goes Through His Back
Here’s a horrifying story with a relatively happy ending: Georgia sprinter Elija Godwin, one of the fastest freshmen in the country, accidentally impaled himself on a javelin while running a backwards sprint drill on Tuesday afternoon. Incredibly, Godwin survived....
Dean Ambrose Is Going To Be Bleeding As Jon Moxley Again
When we last discussed Dean Ambrose in this space a few months ago, news had just broken that he had given WWE his 90-day notice and would not be renewing his contract. That Ambrose was parting with WWE was, at bottom, a sound business decision; with All Elite Wrestling and other promotions bidding ...
It Sure Sounds Like A Cubs Exec Was Trying To Influence Addison Russell Coverage
Nine days before the end of Addison Russell’s 40-game suspension for violating MLB’s domestic violence policy, USA Today’s Bob Nightengale wrote a puff piece about the shortstop’s search for redemption after his ex-wife, Melisa Reidy, said he emotionally and physically abused her. It’s the kind of s...
A Lover's Guide To The NHL Playoffs
The Stanley Cup Playoffs: they apparently started some time ago. I was not apprised of this, but then no one would have thought to do that because I have been very clear with the people in my life that I do not need to be told about the latest developments in the National Hockey League. It’s often a...
Arizona's Zack Godley Wiggles Ass, Balks Home A Run
The first sign that the Diamondbacks were in for a long night against the Cubs came even before the first inning started, when a healthy population of Chicago fans filled the seats of Chase Field. The second sign came in the top of the third, when a seemingly harmless rump shake from pitcher Zack Go...
Raiders Do Fairly Raiders Thing
When the Oakland Raiders selected Clemson’s Clelin Ferrell with the fourth pick in the NFL Draft, the response from fans was mixed to say the least. Some were frustrated, like the man at the top of this post, while others were just flat out confused, like the fan in this clip that stopped to look ar...
Former UFC Fighter Rodrigo De Lima Killed Following Altercation With Rideshare Driver
Former UFC fighter Rodrigo de Lima was killed Sunday in a fatal Uber incident that somehow does not involve the company’s new self-driving brigade. According to reports, de Lima had an argument and “altercation” with Uber driver Jefferson Roger Maciel Barata, which ended with de Lima leaving Barata’...
Sasha Banks And Luke Harper Are Emblematic Of WWE's Talent Mismanagement
Let’s leave aside the draconian contract clauses, and also the sadness of WWE losing one of its best talents and potentially alienating another. The specific failures to get the most out of Luke Harper and Sasha Banks, respectively, are various and complicated, but fundamentally simple at bottom. T...
Tiger Woods Has Come Again In Glory To Help Christians Talk About Easter
The 2019 Masters was only the second-greatest story ever told, apparently. Everyone thought Tiger Woods was as good as dead after years of losing and back problems. Similarly, everyone counted out Jesus after the crucifixion....
Christian Yelich Was One Foot Away From The Perfect Home Run
It’s early enough in the MLB season that pitchers still feel comfortable in trying to test the red-hot Christian Yelich whenever he’s at the plate. Last year’s NL MVP hit two more dingers on Saturday against the Dodgers, which brought him to a league-leading total of 13 home runs. Both homers were p...
Sasha Banks And Luke Harper Want Out Of WWE, But That's Easier Said Than Done
On Tuesday, WWE wrestler Luke Harper tweeted a statement saying that he has requested his release from his contract. This was just a week after Sasha Banks, fresh off an abrupt end to her and Bayley’s storyline push as Women’s Tag Team Champions, reportedly asked for her own release from the promoti...
The Cardinals Were Dumb Enough To Pitch To Christian Yelich Again
How did they not learn? One day after Brewers outfielder Christian Yelich smacked three taters and dropped seven RBI on them in a 10-7 win, the St. Louis Cardinals chose to pitch to him again. Why, idiots?...
Christian Yelich Has Been A Human Fireball Against The Cardinals
When Christian Yelich homered in the first four games of the season, all of which were against the St. Louis Cardinals, it was a fun curio—a hot streak carried over from the Brewers right fielder’s MVP season last year and a great player being great in an unusual way. Gabe Fernandez even wrote about...
João Félix Has Arrived
Release clauses in soccer are oftentimes more symbolic than anything else. Clubs with leverage will often drop a sky high release clause (the amount of money they would have to accept for a player, whether they want to sell him or not) on a promising young player mostly just to scare off interest fr...
Alvin Gentry Thinks Anthony Davis "Got Some Bad Advice"
While some NBA teams were busy making a dramatic push for a playoff spot or sending off a beloved superstar last night, the New Orleans Pelicans were just trying to get their final game against the Warriors over with and slink away from what’s been a disastrous season. The game itself was unremarkab...