ernie Page 6 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hmm, I Guess Maybe The Wizards Are Good Or Whatever
The Washington Wizards struggled through most of the first half of last night’s home game against the extremely shitty New York Knicks. If you’ve followed the Wizards at all in ... well, ever, then it was the type of game you’re used to seeing them piss away (or, sometimes even more maddeningly, to ...
The <i>Inside The NBA</i> Crew Remembers Craig Sager
Before the start of tonight’s Bucks-Bulls game on TNT, the Inside The NBA crew reminisced about their years working with the late Craig Sager. Ernie Johnson was off tonight due to an illness in the family, but he produced a video tribute for Sager, after which Kenny Smith, Charles Barkley, Shaq, and...
The Wizards Are Dead, Ernie Grunfeld Has Killed Them
John Wall scored 52 points last night in a mostly empty arena against the Orlando Magic, who defeated the Wizards anyway, despite not being good or playing all that well. Below is the full highlight reel, if you’re into seeing one of the NBA’s most thrilling players deliver the best scoring performa...
<i>Inside The NBA</i> Crew Talks Politics; EJ Wrote In John Kasich
Instead of previewing the upcoming game between the Heat and the Bulls, the hosts of Inside The NBA instead spoke for a solid 10 minutes about the election of Donald Trump and how they felt a day removed from it. None of the panel supported Trump, but everyone urged their fellow disaffected citizens...
The Missed Opportunity
In America—despite our inequality and blatant cronyism—the socialists never win. The socialists never could have won. Except for this year. ...
Bernie Should Get The Fuck Out
You won’t believe this, but Bernie Sanders won the state of Oregon last night. (Real fucking shocker there, I know.) Anyway, Bernie has no realistic mathematical shot at securing the delegates needed to win the Democratic nomination, AND some his supporters are now openly threatening people, because...
The Wizards Were Embarrassing Failures This Season, Thank God
If 2015-16 hasn’t quite been a disaster for the Washington Wizards—nobody pulled a loaded gun on a teammate in the locker room, so far as I know—it certainly has been a complete waste. They were supposed to be one of the East’s better teams; instead they are shitty, often embarrassingly so, and will...
Ernie Els Started The Masters With A 7-Putt, And It Was Excruciating
You know that sickly feeling you get you’re watching a particularly violent scene in a horror movie that just goes on for way too long? That’s how watching Ernie Els seven-putt his way to a sextuple bogey on the first hole of the Masters will make you feel....
Jonathan Bernier Accidentally Spit On An Ice Crew Member
Excellent reaction by Bernier here....
Bernie Sanders Used A Lot Of Elbows In His Pickup Basketball Games
Democratic presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders showed off his basketball skills as he awaited the New Hampshire primary results last week, and it became clear that he had a devastating set shot. The Guardian’s Les Carpenter dug into Sanders’s hoops history and found that the politician had been part...
Bernie Sanders Is On Fire ... From One Specific Spot On The Floor
Killing time before votes from the New Hampshire primary started trickling in, Bernie Sanders showed off some of the skill that helped his Brooklyn elementary school win the borough championship. I’d make a joke here, but that’s bigger than any basketball accomplishment I have....
Gregg Popovich Is Dismayed With The New Hampshire Primary Results
Gregg Popovich gave his usual surly in-game interview, but then David Aldridge asked a question that intrigued him: did Pop want to know the results of tonight’s primaries in New Hampshire? Yes, yes he did....
Bernie Kosar Is Concerned About Johnny Manziel
Former Browns quarterback Bernie Kosar says he has repeatedly tried to talk to current Browns quarterback Johnny Manziel, but hasn’t gotten a response. This was inevitable, wasn’t it?...
Larry David Makes <i>SNL</i> Return To Play Bernie Sanders Again
Cranky human Larry David reprised his role of a lifetime on Saturday Night Live tonight, and since you enjoyed his turn as Vermont senator and presidential candidate Bernie Sanders last time, we’ll let you argue about how great/awful his impression is down there in the comments again....
Larry David Fulfills Destiny, Plays Bernie Sanders In <i>SNL</i> Cold Open
Before you tweeted it Tuesday night, Saturday Night Live was thinking it: yeah, Senator Bernie Sanders does resemble Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm creator Larry David! So David turned up on tonight’s SNL cold open, managing the rare feat of overshadowing an Alec Baldwin cameo. We urge you all in...
No, Seriously, Dissolve The United States
Ronald Reagan’s Secretary of the Navy, a Republican Senator, and Hillary Clinton walk into a bar. Bartender looks them over and says, “Christ, this is 60 percent of the Democratic presidential campaign field? You motherfuckers make Richard Nixon look like Leon Trotsky.” Then Jim Webb knifes him, bec...
What Did The Patriots' Alleged Spygate Guru Actually <i>Do</i>?
In ESPN’s motherlode about the Patriots’ hilarious history of cheating over the last decade and a half, you’ll notice a mysterious character at the heart of the videotaping operation: “football research director” Ernie Adams. To close observers of the Patriots organization, Adams has been a matter o...
The Fight For The Soul Of Black Lives Matter
A week and a half ago, presidential candidate Bernie Sanders was speaking in Seattle, Wash., when he was interrupted by two young, black protesters. Marissa Janae Johnson and Mara Jacqeline Willaford, representing the local chapter of Black Lives Matter, called on the Vermont senator to publish his ...