evil Page 52 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Watch Lionel Messi Fail To Convert A Game-Winning Penalty Kick
"The reason [Frederic] Kanoute got so worked up was that after Sevilla worked so hard to hold Barca scoreless for 90 minutes, they were awarded a very soft penalty when Andres Iniesta went down in the box. Kanoute earned his first booking when he knocked the ball off the penalty spot as Lionel Mes...

Bruce Hornsby's Son Has A Rangy Dunk Arsenal
Keith Hornsby, the son of noted piano man Bruce Hornsby, is a freshman guard at UNC-Asheville. This is his dunk from their sparsely attended Midnight Madness. Those are some ups, indeed. Hornsby men. That's just the way it is....

After An 18-Second, 80-Yard Game-Winning Drive, Football Team Has To Answer To Guy In Banana Suit
In Minnesota small-college football circles, Augsburg College's stunning upset of St. John's University is being called "The Miracle in Collegeville." That's an apt name considering the game was played in Collegeville and anytime you engineer an 80-yard game-winning drive that starts with 18 secon...

The Two Cops Who Beat Up A Maryland Student Last Year Have Been Indicted
The PG County mounties who went berserk on a Maryland student celebrating his basketball team's win over Duke last year have been charged with felony assault. Took long enough. This episode made national news and even featured an attempted cover-up, when campus surveillance video of the beating we...

Arizona State's QB Has Most Arizona State Bicep Tattoo Ever: "Live Life To It's Fullest"
This is Brock Osweiler, the 6-foot-8 starting quarterback for Arizona State. He led the Sun Devils to a 37-30 win over Missouri last Friday night, and he played a great game: He completed 24 of 32 passes for 354 yards and three TDs. When it was all over, he raised his arms to the adoring public and ...

Millionaire Or Pauper: What Are College Athletes Worth?
There's a report out today that says college athletes are underpaid, and you should probably ignore it. Reading a study from the National College Players Association saying that college athletes should get more money is like reading a study from the NCAA saying student-athletes should never be paid ...

Chartered Flights To China And Dubai Is Pretty Much The Most Dook Thing Ever
"A Duke spokesman said Wednesday he could not reveal the total cost of the charter flights, but the president of a flight chartering company unaffiliated with the Blue Devils ... calculated that the total cost of the charter flights was about $1.1 million..." [The Dagger]...

Who Owns "Evil Empire"? The Yankees Launch A Proxy War For Control
Bridgehampton, N.Y., out on the East End of Long Island, is Red Sox territory. The bars along Main Street are decked out in red and will only show Yankees games if there's nothing else on. TVs receive the Hartford network affiliates. Carl Yastrzemski was born on a nearby potato farm and still holds ...

Logan Morrison Was Demoted Because Wes Helms Is A Super-Secret Double-Agent Mole: A Theory
Marlins outfielder/tweeter Logan Morrison was demoted to AAA New Orleans on Saturday night. It was a weird demotion, because Morrison ranks second in OPS on the team (ahead of first baseman Gaby Sanchez, and any outfielders who might replace him) and because the Marlins are 56-64, burnt toast....

You Still Get A Nudist Site At A Domain That Now Belongs To Arizona State
A court this week awarded Arizona State the rights to sundevils.com, but the site still redirects to diablosundevils.com, a NSFW nudist/naturist club site whose home page we have helpfully screen grabbed for you. The naturist club's site's owner has said he had nothing to do with the redirect, whic...

A List Of People To Whom The Internet Has Compared Kyle Singler
Some comparisons, culled from the Internet in advance of Kyle Singler's being drafted approximately one round too early tomorrow. Sic'd:...

Too <em>Moneyball</em> For Their Own Good: How The Mets Screwed Up The Kazmir Trade
The Angels released Scott Kazmir on Wednesday, and we had seen it coming for years. Hitters clobbered Kazmir in 2009, 2010, and, in his one 2011 start. He lost his control and velocity simultaneously, and stopped striking hitters out....

Duke Tweets The Dookiest Tweet Imaginable
I'd be a very happy man if someone in the University of Arizona public relations department retweeted this. [@DukeNews]...

Watch Man U's Gary Neville Throw A Truly Terrible First Pitch At A White Sox Game
Gary Neville, who played right back for England and Manchester United for perhaps forever, before retiring this year, was in Chicago on Thursday night to throw out the first pitch before the White Sox-A's game. Man U and the Chicago Fire will be playing a friendly shortly. He and his 400 caps are ...

Incoming Dukie Wants To Give Himself A Nickname
"Wearing number 0 next year! My nick name is going to be subzero! Cause of number and because my moves freeze people, got ice in my veins!!" Sigh. It just happens so quickly. [@AustinRivers25, Via Ballin' is a Habit]...

Chile To Investigate Pablo Neruda's Death; FIFA-Adviser Henry Kissinger To Investigate His Navel
A judge in Chile just ordered an investigation into the mysterious death of poet Pablo Neruda, who supposedly succumbed to prostate cancer 12 days after a Henry Kissinger-backed right wing coup installed a hideous dictator who brutalized and slaughtered his own people for years. The circumstances su...

David Beckham Secures A Post-Soccer Future In Field Security With This Fan Takedown
English soccer clubs sometimes play "testimonials," in which they bring back their older stars for a friendly match of former rivals. Like parades or bowling parties, it's a nice way to make the old folk feel appreciated for still being around. Yesterday, with Man United playing Juventus in the Ga...

Today In Great Quotes: Ray Lewis On How Evil Pertains To The Lockout
"Do this research if we don't have a season — watch how much evil, which we call crime, watch how much crime picks up, if you take away our game," Ray Lewis told ESPN's Sal Paolantonio....

This Is What It Looks Like To Almost Get Trampled By A Runaway Racehorse
Hickey posted about this traumatizing moment at the Grand Annual Steeplechase at Australia's Warrnambool carnival this morning, when a wild racehorse leaped over a fence and into a crowd of people, injuring an 80-year-old woman and a two-year-old boy and scaring the shit out of an unspecified numb...

Charlie Villanueva And Ryan Hollins Celebrate End Of Miserable Seasons With An Eye-Gouging Affair
The Cleveland Cavaliers, at 18-63, boast the second-worst record in the NBA. The Pistons don't have much more to brag about (although they do have Rodney Stuckey) at 29-52. Neither will have a place in the playoffs following their final regular-season games tomorrow night. So perhaps Detroit's Cha...