ew Page 2071 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Darkest Form Of Basketball Is This Dead Whale Clanging Off A Dumpster
The wonderful state of New Hampshire—full disclosure: I grew up in New Hampshire—has made national news this week, as the world has been captivated by the Granite State’s inability to properly dispose of a dead minke whale that washed ashore at Jenness Beach in Rye Monday. Though a juvenile, the wha...
The Time Dave McKenna Converted His Son From Katy Perry To Minor Threat
Our beloved colleague Dave McKenna tells good stories. He’s done a lot of cool shit, met many weird people in weird ways, and had his run-ins with the law. And after selfishly squirreling all his stories away in Slack and our brains for years, we’ve realized we have a societal obligation to share....
Timberwolves Drama Turns Into Spicy Internet Beef Somehow Featuring Stephen Jackson
You’re going to have to put a little effort into keeping up, here, because it involves multiple different social media platforms, and I am getting too old for this shit....
Beefiest Chum Luke Voit Has To Do Something With All That Surplus Power
The one-armed bench press seems like a fine strength training exercise, although probably there are better ways of doing it than with a full barbell smashing off your chest. At any rate, if you were going to pick a baseball player to show up in a video doing one-armed 135-pound bench presses with a ...
Ex-Bills WR: There’s Nothing To Do In Buffalo But Fuck
Jordan Matthews signed with the Eagles today. The receiver, who was with Philadelphia for the first three seasons of his NFL career, was signed to boost the team’s depleted receiving corps. Matthews spent last season with the Bills—the Eagles had traded him and a draft pick for cornerback Ronald Dar...
Why An Ex-Jets Great Wants Nothing To Do With The Jets
Excerpted from Beyond Broadway Joe: The Super Bowl TEAM That Changed Football, now available from Dey Street Books, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers....
Oh Good, Time For Patriots Fans To Get Mad At ESPN Again
Those were good times, weren’t they? When that big ESPN report on a schism between Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, driven in part by Brady’s shady nutrition “guru” Alex Guerrero, dropped right before the playoffs and set off rounds of denials and non-denials and recriminations, and a whole lot of scre...
Orioles Rookie's First Career Base Hit Turns Into Ridiculous Clown Show<em></em>
The Orioles and Blue Jays are currently playing a series that has no significance whatsoever to the greater baseball universe. The only reason to have these games is so such-and-such youngster can get his first taste of life in the majors. In this case the youngster is Orioles rookie outfielder DJ S...
The <i>New Yorker</i> Looks To A Stupid Man To Answer An Even Stupider Question
Sports and politics cannot be separated. Sports expresses, iterates, and interacts with politics at basically every point of their intersection. Even apart from the myriad ways sports, specifically, contain and are shaped by politics, as parts of what we’re still obliged to call a society even as it...
NCAA Weighing Ban On Keegan Brewer's Incredible Trick Punt Return<em></em>
North Texas sophomore Keegan Brewer pulled one of the ballsiest stunts in all of college football on Saturday; naturally, it took about three days for the NCAA to try to outlaw it forever....
Ass Team Of The Week: Everything Is Wrong With The Arizona Cardinals
There are often discrete reasons that go a long way toward explaining a bad team’s badness. Look to the New York Giants, a team with a decent defense, perhaps the best receiver in the league, and a superhuman rookie running back that is nonetheless very bad because of one simple reason: they can’t b...
The Reds Are Now The Property Of Christian Yelich, Those Are The Rules
Brewers outfielder Christian Yelich hit for the cycle in a game against the Reds back on August 29. It was a career night for Yelich, who finished 6-for-6 from the plate with three RBI in a wacky Brewers win. Yelich hit three dingers and drove in nine runs in that three-game series, so the Reds were...
All Is Not Well In Minnesota
Jimmy Butler helped the Minnesota Timberwolves improve their win total by a whopping 16 games from the 2016-2017 season to last season. Playing with one of the NBA’s most promising young big men and surrounded by, umm, a familiar cast of playoff-tested veterans, it would seem that Butler has landed ...
Josh Gordon Traded To The Patriots, Of Fucking Course
And here are the terms:...
This Is Who The Giants Are
I don’t want to hear a single reader complain about having to watch the Giants in primetime. Buddy, I live here; I’m forced to watch them every week. And yes, based on this extensive firsthand knowledge, they absolutely are this bad....
Tavon Austin Embarrasses Giants Secondary For First Touchdown In Two Years
It didn’t take long for Tavon Austin and the Cowboys to show their true colors and disrespect the red, white and blue on national television, again. Dak “MAGA Seneca Wallace” Prescott got Dallas on the board early with a deep bomb to Austin, who’d burst right past New York’s defense in an absolute b...
![A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/cjsfxubowdd5gqxjfgy1.gif)
A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]
The NFL’s absolutely terrible and impossible new definition of roughing the passer—which prohibits defensive players from landing on quarterbacks with their body weight—came into play during today’s Vikings-Packers game and directly affected the outcome. In what eventually became a 29-29 tie (don’t ...
It Is Brutally Hot In Jacksonville
The Jaguars’ home opener is a rematch of the AFC Championship, and the kickoff temperature for that one was a balmy 48 degrees. But that was at Foxboro. This is Jacksonville, a.k.a. Satan’s armpit, and temperature at kickoff is 97 degrees—with the humidity making it feel more like 107. It is the hot...
Saints Become First Team To Beat Browns In 37 Weeks<em></em><em></em><em></em>
The New Orleans Saints snapped their winless streak that dated back over eight months, and ended the Browns’ lengthy undefeated stretch of 37 weeks, by taking down undefeated Cleveland this afternoon, 21-18....
Damontae Kazee Ejected For Late Helmet-To-Helmet Hit On Cam Newton<em></em>
A 10-yard fourth-down scramble from Cam Newton led to a brutal head-to-head collision and an ejection for Falcons safety Damontae Kazee in the second quarter of today’s Panthers-Falcons game. Newton slid down at the end of his run and took a straight-on helmet-to-helmet hit from the Falcons defender...