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To Watch Tonight
What to watch while trying to figure out why David Beckham is trying to kill us all... ...

Bucs vs. Giants, The Second Half!
It was either this, or a picture of four Tampa cheerleaders. I like to think I made the right decision (thanks to Getty Images for the choice though). Since we last saw each other at halftime things have taken an interesting turn. The Bucs botched the opening kickoff giving the Giants an incredible...

Bucs vs. Giants! Yar, They Blow!
It's that time again, and I'm positively pumped for this one! New York and Tampa are taking the field and the air is alive with excitement! Who am I kidding? I'm watching Pitt play Nova while taping the Wizards and the Sonics. Don't worry though, I've brought in a reinforcement television and I'll ...

Bynum Pulls Out of the G-Spot Too Fast
Will Bynum, formerly of Georgia Tech and Arizona fame, was arrested sometime yesterday in Tel Aviv, Israel (I don't do time zones) after a fight at a club turned into a hit-and-run. via Haaretz.com...

Pittsburgh vs. Jacksonville
Well that last game pretty much ripped my heart right out, but I don't think this one is capable of such damage. Regardless, there's money on the table and I'm already down, so my interest stoked. The Jaguars crossed Clemente Bridge for the second time in three weeks with enough confidence to take t...

Today's Picto-Tube Schedule
Terrelle Pryor is one of the featured athletes on display in today's U.S. Army All-American Bowl at 1:00 pm on NBC. Continue after the jump for the rest of the day's best television offerings....

We Still Believe In Zook
• Boy, was that Rose Bowl ever fun. • Terrell Owens trademarks himself. • Wade Phillips' hot daughter might be reading this. • Smelly children. • Kerry Collins saved the Titans' season. • That hockey game ruled. • Big trouble in big China. • So was that Gisele lady there, or wasn't she? • Here comes...

NFL Wild Card Pants Party: Buccaneers Vs. Giants
We are incredibly pleased to live in a world in which this guy is facing off against this guy in an NFL playoff game....

Tom Brady Wants You To Buy Some Water
Glaceau smartwater; magic elixir of the Gods. Too bad it wasn't around in 2000, when Brady posed for this photo for the NFL combine. How times have changed. Now our hero is toting the water in a new series of print ads (the real ads can be found here), for which he was paid a reported $3 million. I...

Roger Clemens Gets A World Class Drilling
There's something kind of awesome about Mike Wallace's questioning of Roger Clemens on "60 Minutes," set to air this Sunday. Clemens uses the tired, repeatedly discredited "it was just B-12!" alibi, and boy, does Wallace ever get after him....

These Ones Only Go To Eleven: Your Wild Card Jamboroo
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

Isiah Thomas Is Many Wonderful, Vibrant Shades Of Crazy
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, a copy of which I carry at all times, a delusion is defined as: "A false belief based on incorrect inference about external reality." There are three photos of Isiah Thomas next to the entry. Just prior to the Knicks' a 107-97 l...

Dirk Exorcizes Some Demons
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or wearing skinny ties, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy....

In Praise Of The Patriots (Kind Of)
So we're about to make a confession here, and we're not happy about it. We were watching that Patriots-Giants game last Saturday night, and after Randy Moss caught that ridiculous touchdown pass from Tom Brady, something terrifying occurred to us: We were rooting for the Patriots....

Introducing io9, For The William Gibson In You
We are proud (and, yes, goaded into) to introduce a new Gawker Media blog: It's called io9, and it's about science fiction. That's right: It's a whole blog devoted solely to science fiction. Don't even pretend you're not interested....

Patriots Fans Are Deranged, Buxom
A lot of people say that they're Patriots' fans, but how many are willing to bare their breasts for the cause? (No, not you, sir; please sit down). Sorry if I'm late to the party with this, but I've only just heard of wannabe actress Cheryl Ling, who is better known as the topless Patriots superfan ...

Isiah Passes Grueling Two-Week Evaluation Of Self
Isiah Thomas gave himself two weeks to get his act together, or he would fire himself as coach of the New York Knicks. The two weeks were up on Tuesday, so what's the verdict? Although the Knicks finished 1-4 during that span — including four straight losses — Isiah happily announced on Tuesday that...


When The Saints Go Golfing
It's hard to imagine that less than 12 months ago these two teams were meeting for a chance to play in the Super Bowl. Seriously, they were. I looked it up! Devin Hester (The Jester Molester) returned a 64 yard punt, Neckbeard Orton threw the ball like he was throwing back girly cocktails, and just ...

NFL Roundup: The Perfect Pats
I'd like to extend my sincerest thanks to the NFL for allowing me to watch last night's football game. In fact, If Greg Bryant Gumbel hadn't been calling the action; I might have even considered it one of the most entertaining games I'd ever watched. (Seriously, he blows.) Did I jump off my couch wh...