Isiah Passes Grueling Two-Week Evaluation Of Self

Isiah Thomas gave himself two weeks to get his act together, or he would fire himself as coach of the New York Knicks. The two weeks were up on Tuesday, so what's the verdict? Although the Knicks finished 1-4 during that span — including four straight losses — Isiah happily announced on Tuesday that he is staying on as coach. He passed! Whew! That was a close one.

"We'll keep moving in this direction," Thomas said. When asked what direction that would be, he responded, "Me as coach." Happy New Year, Knicks fans.

Thomas then called a closed-door meeting with himself, after which he reported that he may have been fondled.

• Scottie Pippen, Making Friends. How does one lobby for a head coaching job in the NBA? By ridiculing that team's current players, naturally. Scottie Pippen is playing it very wise indeed, on Monday telling the Chicago Tribune that Ben Gordon and Kirk Hinrich shoot too much, among other things. Pippen said that Gordon is "out there shooting for a contract" and that "taking bad shots is a sign of a lack of respect for your teammates. You think I'm going to run back if I know B.J. Armstrong is jacking it up?'' Pippen said, the newspaper reported. ''My shot is just as good as his. That's what players think ... You can't have midgets running your backcourt. Little guards always put you in a vulnerable position."

Still The Coach [New York Post]