fail Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fake, Jingoistic, And Stupid: Gymnastics Coverage Is The Worst Part Of NBC's Olympics
If you have a full-time job, no privacy at work, and/or a boss who cares about productivity, you probably didn't spend two hours in the middle of the day, like I did, watching the women's all-around Olympic gymnastics final. This means that you get to see it tonight on NBC, with routines sprinkled b...

Singer Of Worst National Anthem Performance Ever Blames Vuvuzelas For Making Her Sing Off-Key
The parents of 11-year-old Harper Gruzins are defending their daughter's performance of "The Star-Spangled Banner" before Saturday's Galaxy-FC Dallas match, claiming critics who called it the worst national anthem performance ever are "mean and hateful."...

This Is The Worst National Anthem Rendition Ever
Back in January, we brought you Steven Tyler's "Star-Spangled Banner" performance and asked how it stacked up to the worst-ever performances. (Your leading vote-getter was Roseanne's regrettable 1990 crotch-grabbing rendition.)...

Failure At The Mile High Club
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

What's It Like To Sing The Anthem At A Baseball Game? The Story Of One Man's Perilous Fight
When I was a kid, I used to sing in the school choir. We had recitals for parents and teachers, and for the recitals we'd have to dress up in chinos and dress shirts, and the music teacher would arrange us along a set of risers, with all the tall boys in back and all the short girls in the front, ou...

Don't Leave A Rubber On All Night By Accident
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Presenting One Of History's Great Walks Of Shame
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

The ESPYs Nokia PreParty Is Awesome, But Its Publicist Is Sort Of Lazy
All your favorite athletes are chillin' at the ESPYs Nokia PreParty. I hear it's awesome. Almost as awesome as this social media PR fail. First, an accidental DeSean Jackson tweet, and then a flurry of other athletes tweeting that precise line. Most of them, at least, remembered to take out the publ...

Dogs Are Not Your Manhood's Best Friend
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
![The Titanic Of Failed Hookup Stories [Very NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17qlcwcwdbh0sjpg.jpg)
The Titanic Of Failed Hookup Stories [Very NSFW]
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

"I Will Give You 5 Blowjobs If You Take Me To See <em>Brokeback Mountain</em>," She Said
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Cockblocked By The Dreaded Hanger-On
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

LeBron James Had A Big Game Last Night For Cleveland, According To ESPN
The folks in Northeast Ohio must be pretty stoked this morning. Forty-eight years without a pro sports championship, and just when all looked lost once again, LeBron goes out and does that, and now it's back home for Game 7. I, for one, can't wait to see how it all ends, if only to read Scott Raab's...

Cockblocked By Asthma!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Saturday's United States-Scotland Friendly Featured A Clash Of Terribly-Performed National Anthems
The U.S. Men's National Team thrashed Scotland 5-1 in Jacksonville Saturday on the strength of a Landon Donovan hat trick, but the festival atmosphere at EverBank Field (where the attendance of 44,438 set a record for national friendlies in the state) was nearly snuffed out before the match ever be...

Pussyblocked By Your College Major!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Cops Will Steal Your Girlfriend!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Newspaper's HS Softball Season Wrap-Up Includes No Stats, "Due To The Coach's Bullshit And Laziness."
So this is one of those Twitter things, without much backstory. (We saw it here first.) But the team in question is the Rayne (Louisiana) High Lady Wolves, the coach is Deserea Dunn, and the paper is, we think, the Rayne Independent. The Lady Wolves crashed out of the district playoffs last month, s...

The Angels Are Getting Desperate
Seven games out of first. No one's hitting. (Hitting coach Mickey Hatcher got the ax today.) Nothing seems to be working. So Fox Sports West, despite a win yesterday, made a plea via on-screen graphic. Somebody do something. Anything. Call up Minor League Guy. [via @nocoastoffense]...

Cockblocked By A Washing Machine!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....