There is a special moment in the news cycle during which outlets report on things that are not happening, but that maybe could happen, but that also could not not happen because it would be so interesting if they did happen. Do you follow?
First, he showed up at a Packers practice dressed in a Favre jersey and apparently signed a few autographs, which, for a day or two, made for a rather amusing story. Then, somebody interviewed him, and he was just so surprised at all the attention he received for showing up at a Packers practice dressed in a Favre…
The following comprises actual phrases from actual stories written about a quarterback who last night performed the miracle of transfiguring his old ass off the injured list. These are taken verbatim.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
Care to read a Favre-free and largely dickless Deadspin? Click here. H/T commenter BloggyMcBlogBlog
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Monday Night Football production crew, which broke out the party font because an aging hornball reached a meaningless round-number milestone.
"How does Alex Barron have a job in football, other than selling beer in the stands?" Peter King tweeted yesterday after the Cowboys lineman concluded his evening with a hold you could see from the Lions-Bears replay booth. "He is a disgrace."
His eyes have been a little dry lately, and he's probably going to get them checked out. Other than that, he's cool. The end. [FavreHouse]
Brett Favre held a press conference today to officially announce he was returning to the Vikings for one more failed Super Bowl run. While he discussed the physical toll that the game has taken on him, it became clear: Brett's really old.
Brett Favre is on a plane that is possibly headed towards Minnesota. The muffled shouting you hear is Tarvaris Jackson screaming while submerged in the locker room ice bath. [NFL.com]
Peter King, May 3: "I'm finished predicting what he'll do..." Peter King, today: "I fully expect, as does any thinking person, Favre to rehab his ankle for the next couple of months and be in camp (not on time) sometime in August..."
From the same Vikings radio team that brought you "This is not Detroit, man" comes this swaggering bit of audio, spoken just moments earlier: "Game's tied at 28. Fine. Because Brett Favre is the quarterback of the Minnesota Vikings."
There are two noble conventions of football journalism that will fall by the wayside should Brett Favre elect to sit his old ass down for good. The first is of the Werder-Mortensen "Sources: Favre eats soup" variety. And the second?
"This is not Detroit, man — THIS IS THE SUPER BOWL!" Poor guys. [SI.com/Via ExtraMustard
The Minneapolis Star Tribune is already pimping a book about "American institution" Brett Favre's first season in Minnesota, "the most memorable in the history of the franchise." This seems presumptuous. More breathless prose after the jump. Plus, an important announcement.
"ESPN, says spokesman Mike Soltys, will announce that on next Monday's broadcast of its ESPN2 SportsNation (5 p.m. ET), it will try to set a record for the most mentions of Brett Favre on a TV show..."[AwfulAnnouncing]
Say what you will about the morality issues tied in with Mike Vick's return to the NFL, but perhaps it is another QB who's return was much-discussed about whom we should be worrying the most.
As noted earlier, Brett Favre launched himself in the direction of Eugene Wilson's cruciate ligaments last night — an undeniable prick move that surely no one would chalk up to Favre's oft-cited youthful exuberance. Right?
