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This Bike Is Literally The Fastest Thing On Two Wheels
At a former Air Force base, Bill Warner set a new land speed record, getting his modified Suzuki Hayabusa up to just shy of 312 MPH. If you're feeling insecure about your ride, just note that Warner needed a shove to get going....
World Peace And Breast Milk: An Evening With Ron Artest, Funny Man
In late August, after a review by the Los Angeles Superior Court, Ron Artest will legally change his name to Metta World Peace. His basketball jersey will say "WORLD PEACE." "With a space and everything," his publicist said....
Meat Loaf Was My Softball Coach
In 1991, I was a high school freshman in the small town of Redding, Conn. My brother was a senior, and his prom date was one of our neighbors down the street, a junior, Pearl Aday. Pearl would drive me home from softball practice when her father, our coach, was unable to. I preferred Pearl, as her d...
Chris Kluwe's 'Downfall' Parody Has Hitler Calling Lockout Negotiators "Lazy Shitfucks"
Downfall parodies seem like they're somehow older than the internet by now. But when one is made by an actual NFL player, we're willing to listen. And Vikings punter Chris Kluwe does a pretty good job of capturing what we're all feeling about the lockout these days....
Watch: Abby Wambach Is Much, Much, Much Tougher Than You Are
Tipster Catherine has alerted us to this video, which is an irritatingly scored ten-minute highlight video from Mexico's upset of the USA in a World Cup qualifier last year. But buried within that video is the highlight we've cut for you above, and we took the electro-crap out of it too....
The Dangers Of Handjobs From Softball Players
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Rick Reilly Goes Union-Busting
Rick Reilly popped another reheated turd out of the microwave. It's a variation on his standard deification of golf as the world's most perfect sport. But here's the twist: this time those blue collar heroes of the links are contrasted with the greedy millionaires of the NBA and NFL....
Oh Dear God, This Lady's Limb Gets Snapped When She Arm Wrestles A Younger Gal On A Picnic Table
There's talk of placing bets on this Over the Top re-enactment between two ladies. There's also talk of not putting this on YouTube. Then, there's talk of a snapped arm, not too far from a flask and what looks like blue Jello....
Harry Potter Versus Star Wars: The Final Judgment
The final Harry Potter movie opens up this week, and all week long people have been saying "goodbye" to the franchise. Lots of crying in your butterbeer and all that....
Chelsea's Yossi Benayoun Shows Off A "Cheeky Finish" In A "Behind-Closed-Doors" Friendly Match
EPL powerhouse Chelsea played its first preseason match of the year yesterday. They did so against a woefully overmatched foe, the Wycombe Wanderers. Four minutes in, Yossi Benayoun fancied the ball into the net in a fashion that would stand out even at the end of the season. Good for Yossi. (H/T ...
Australian Netballer Suspended For Inappropriate Upskirt Touching
Per the Warnambool Standard, "A district league netballer has been given a two-week suspended sentence following allegations she made indecent contact up an opponent's skirt. The South West District Football Netball League (SWDFNL) has refused to name any of the parties involved or the circumstance...
James Harrison Probably Hates You, Too: More Quotes From The <em>Men's Journal</em> Article
When he was young, James Harrison used to shoot birds and squirrels in his yard. He also slept in the same bed as his parents until he was 12. These and other revelations come to us courtesy of Paul Solotaroff's profile of The Silverback Steeler in the August issue of Men's Journal, which hits newss...
Seven Minutes Of An Argentinian Man Cursing At His Soccer Match On TV, With English Subtitles
We hope you saw the original last week; it's delightful. We want to this man to became as famous here as he is in his homeland, so here's the same video with his nonstop stream of creative profanity translated into English....
The 100 Worst Baseball Players Of All Time: A Celebration (Part 2)
Here's the second part of the roundup of baseball's low achievers. Part 1 is here....
The 100 Worst Baseball Players Of All Time: A Celebration (Part 1)
This is a celebration. I realize that sounds strange—compiling a list of the worst of something doesn't seem like a joyous occasion. But by worst 100 baseball players I don't just mean the objective worst, the statistical worst, the most physically discomforting to watch. I mean the players whose fa...
Deadspin Classic: And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's <em>Great American Songbook</em>, Remixed
Tim McCarver spent the evening talking on your television. Now let him sing you to sleep. Originally published Nov. 13, 2009....
If You Want To Call Jose Canseco, His Number Is 818-903-6598
So says the Miami New Times, anyway. Do it, if you have the patience!...
The One Where Some Guy Tries To Sell Us Proof That Bernie Kosar's Daughter Is Doing Porno
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. This space is now reserved for those scuzz-money entrepreneurs who've unsuccessfully tried to sell us prurient information. This is also where we'll run notable emails we've received from some of our readers. All emails are [sic]'d. Enjoy. ...
Rafael Furcal Is Worth One Kitchen And A Swimming Pool, And Other McCourt-Divorce Grotesqueries
These are not happy times for the Dodgers. They're bankrupt and at the center of a hate triangle between the McCourts and Bud Selig. The worst part is how easily this all could have been avoided. While the team is struggling to make payroll from month to month, the McCourts' pre-divorce personal exp...
This Is Michael Irvin On The Cover Of <em>Out</em> Magazine
There's a fantastic Michael Irvin profile in this month's Out magazine which, given the recent newsworthy items about another particular NFC East wide receiver, will hopefully lead to more progress on the issue. Irvin reveals how in his early Playmaker days, he was just as guilty of stereotyping, ga...