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We've Just Mailed Out Our First Super Bowl XLV Bounty Hunt Check For This Jimmy Johnson Photo
A pleasant reader named Noah emailed us in with an offer for a photo of Jimmy Johnson stocking up at a Dallas liquor store as part of our XLV Bounty Hunt stupidity. We gave him an offer. He accepted....
Alabama Livens Up Staid Fax-Cam With Sex Appeal
Bama's doing the traditional webcam-pointed-at-their-fax-machine for National Signing Day. Boring, until you notice the "talent" they've got retrieving the incoming faxes. [via EDSBS]...
This Isn't How You're Supposed To Lift A Guy On A Stretcher
I don't know who this player is or how he hurt himself, but I do know this video is about five Leslie Nielsen movies rolled into one. [Via Twitter]...
Yep, Mark Sanchez Really Used Mark Brunell Like A Snot Rag
S, N, O, T. Snot! Snot! Snot! Several of you have sent this in. American heroes, one and all. (But this one came from Royce.)...
A Horrifying Selection Of Port-A-Potty Sex Stories
What's it like to make love to a drunken stranger in an outdoor waste box? Some readers have an answer....
Glow-In-The-Dark Surfer Riding 40-Foot Wave At Night? Yes Please.
Mark Visser, illuminated by submarine lighting, rode the Jaws break off of Maui early yesterday morning. It's like Point Break meets Tron....
The Great Qwest Field Beer Scandal Of 2011
Here's a video purporting to show that a "large" beer at Qwest Field is exactly the same amount as a "small," despite the $1.25 price difference. Drink up tomorrow, Seahawks fans....
TCU Billboards Near Ohio State Are The Best Comeback
The Little Sisters of the Poor apparently have enough money to put up billboards around Columbus, congratulating TCU on their Rose Bowl win. Take that, drivers of Central Ohio!...
Just Vote For Jeff Bagwell, You Hypocrites
Jerod Morris idly wondered if Raul Ibanez might've had a little pharmaceutical help, and everyone went nutso. Damien Cox suggested Jose Bautista's numbers were surprising, and he caught shit. So why is it OK to not vote for Bagwell because of "suspicions?"...
Are You Now Or Have You Ever Been An Idiot?
The argument here — that we're justified in suspecting Jeff Bagwell of using steroids because he "never uttered a word" or "demand[ed] accountability" about PEDs in baseball — is straight-up HUACtastic bullshit, no chaser....
This Free Throw Bends Physics
If you're like me, you'll watch this approximately 30 times in the next hour. It's captivating. [via Plantar Fasciitis]...
Remembering The "Lorchcast," Worst Sportscast Ever
On Dec. 19, 1995, Matt Lorch, a fill-in sportscaster for KHQA in Quincy, Illinois, endured nearly six minutes on-air with malfunctioning videos, unplanned catch-phrases, and one of the most heartbreaking sighs ever sighed. Fifteen years later, we remember Lorchcast....
HS Team Lives By The Three-Quarter Court Shot Dies By The Three-Quarter Court Shot
On Dec. 4, Annapolis Area Christian School and McDonogh were tied 47-47 in a high school baskeball game when AACS stole an inbounds pass and Phillip Perry nailed a looooong shot to win the game....
Chinese Hurdler Just Doesn't Give A Fuck
So you've tripped on the first couple of hurdles, aren't going to win, and are dead tired. What else to do but bust straight through the remaining ones, whether they're in your lane or not?...
This Is How You Give A Post-Game Interview
Rugby — it's just 30 men having a hug/fight. Still, when it comes to cutting through the post-match bullshit, Saracen's boss Brendan Venter has got it all worked out....
Vikings Fans: Enjoy Joe Webb, No Guaranteed Seating, And No Booze
How many Minnesotans are wondering if they can just cancel the season now? Monday's game at TCF Bank Stadium will be "first-come, first-serve" and there will be no alcohol sold. Also, terrible football. [Pioneer Press]...
This Photo Is Great
It's got everything: Garnett taking a vaudeville bow, Ray Allen smiling at some private joke, Nate Robinson concussing himself, and Paul Pierce doing the last number from All That Jazz. Photo by UPI's John Angelillo. [@si_vault; also, you are encouraged to read Leitch's take on the game]...
FreeDarko Also Scrubbed From Bill Simmons's Book
It seems Charlie Pierce wasn't the only critic to get thrown out of the Sports Fella's book. Or maybe there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for this that has nothing whatsoever to do with this? [FreeDarko]...
Charles P. Pierce Responds To Bill Simmons's Response To Charles P. Pierce's Response To Bill Simmons's Book
First came this. Then came Simmons's tweet. And now here's Pierce: "And right back at you, you mendacious, whiny little thin-skinned bag of breeze, you. I've been thrown out of better joints than your bibliography." Yeah, Pierce wins. [Boston.com]...
Anyone Want To Apply For Texas's Defensive Coordinator Job?
The school's job posting is up, and from this we can learn all sorts of fascinating stuff about the position. It entails "direct customer contact," "exposure to large crowds," and "climbing of ladders," for instance. Also: "Hours per week: 40.00 Variable."...