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Doug "Muscle Hamster" Martin Wants To Switch Nicknames
Buccaneers running back Doug Martin is commonly known as “Muscle Hamster,” but he really hates that nickname. We’ve covered this before. This week, Martin revived his plea to give him any other nickname. That’s not how it works....

NFL Fines Cameron Heyward For Eye Black Honoring His Dad Who Died From Cancer
Steelers defensive end Cameron Heyward is the son of Craig “Ironhead” Heyward, a former NFL fullback who died at the age of 39 from brain cancer. To remember his father, Heyward wrote “Iron Head” on his eye black for Monday night’s game against the Chargers. That’s against the league’s uniform polic...

Auburn Fan Tammy Goes Back On The Finebaum Show, Gets Mad As Hell
Auburn got stomped by LSU last weekend, which means it was time for notorious Auburn superfan Tammy to call into Paul Finebaum’s show and let off a little steam. ...

Here's The List Of Ridiculous Fines Virginia Tech Football Players Were Subject To
Yesterday, Virginia Tech defensive coordinator Bud Foster told reporters that he and other coaches had a policy of fining players for things like missing practices or meetings. The reason Foster was ever asked about fines in the first place was that a few beat reporters had noticed a screen in the t...

Doug Martin Is Still Not Really Down With That Whole "Muscle Hamster" Thing
Poor Doug Martin finds himself in the unenviable position of owning a very unique nickname that everyone else seems to enjoy, but that he himself despises. Martin started his Stop Calling Me “Muscle Hamster” campaign years ago, and God bless him, he’s still going strong....

Extreme Humidity Is Turning My Home Into Gorgonzola
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

How To Get A Chill Cat
So you’ve decided to get a pet. Maybe you’re hankering for some furry companionship to perk up the lonesome evenings. Perhaps you’re attempting to plug an emotional gap in your life by saving some of god’s non-edible creatures. Or maybe you just want to strike back at those people clogging up your I...

Glen Davis Fined For Kicking Seat Cushion Into Crowd
Glen Davis punted a seat cushion into the stands during a timeout in Sunday's Clippers-Celtics game, and now the forward is out $15,000. Treat those chairs with respect, NBA players. (He got some good distance on it, though.)...

How To Eat At A Fancy Restaurant As Though You Belong There
I get it. Your favorite restaurant is Big Chuck's Grilled Meat Wagon, parked between The Noodle Truck and The Taco Truck down at the daily lunchtime curbside bazaar of food trucks. Fine. I, too, love Big Chuck's selection of grilled meats. He's got some quality meats down there on the wagon, no one ...

Kevin Love Says His Relationship With LeBron Is Fine. It's Fine.
Cavaliers power forward Kevin Love was a guest on Mike & Mike this morning, and he was of course asked to describe his relationship with teammate and sub-tweeter LeBron James. According to Love, their relationship is fine. It's fine....

![Notorious Finebaum Caller Tammy Joins Iron Bowl Simulcast [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Notorious Finebaum Caller Tammy Joins Iron Bowl Simulcast [UPDATE]
Paul Finebaum's radio show has long had its cast of compelling, crazy, or cretinous callers, and Auburn fan Tammy is one of its most famous. She joined the SEC Network call-in simulcast of tonight's Iron Bowl in Tuscaloosa, and let loose with her usual flow of.. words, sort of....


The NBA Continues To Crack Down On The Big Balls Dance
If there's one thing that should immediately earn an NBA player your respect, it is a willingness to do Sam Cassell's Big Balls Dance right in the face of a tyrannical, anti-balls league....

Angry Alabama Fan Is Back With More Burns For Colin Cowherd
The last time we heard from Phyllis, she was smarting from Alabama's Iron Bowl loss to Auburn, and called into Paul Finebaum's radio show to let off some steam by calling Colin Cowherd mean names, like "Cow-Turd." Alabama lost last weekend, and Cowherd once again drew Phyllis's ire with his comments...

NFL Fines Pete Carroll, Seahawks For Contact In Offseason Practice
Pete Carroll and the Seahawks will be fined approximately $300,000 for "excessive contact between players during a June 16 practice," according to Chris Mortensen. The team will also lose two minicamp practices next season. Another report said the NFL Players Association looked into a possible viola...


The Time MJ Reffed A 3-On-3 Game Between NBA Stars And Sumo Wrestlers
Here's some fascinating video out of 1996 Japan. While on a promotional tour for Nike, Charles Barkley, Jason Kidd and Michael Finley took on three sumo wrestlers in a game refereed by Michael Jordan. ...

Read The NFL's List Of Finable Offenses
Couple days back, the Boston Globe's Ben Volin posted the NFL's schedule of fines for the 2014 season, in two parts. It's below, in one part, because we are not afraid to be service-y....

We Are Uncool
Here's the first of 3 singles we'll be posting this week from my new full-length mix, Another Fine Mess....