fire Page 14 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Chiefs Just Fired Todd Haley
Kansas City announced it on their website. They haven't announced an interim replacement, but Haley had Romeo Crennel AND Jim Zorn on his staff. So many possibilities! (UPDATE: It's Crennel.)...
The Capitals Axed Lovable "Fat Fuck" Coach Bruce Boudreau
You'll recall that Alex Ovechkin, the supremely talented, supremely underachieving, similarly fat Caps winger, called Boudreau a "fat fuck" after being benched late in a game less than a month ago. Things have not gone well since....
Mike McQueary Tells CBS His Emotions Are "Like A Snow Globe," Returns To Al Capone's Vault
CBS hyped up a televised interview with Penn State assistant coach and alleged child rape witness Mike McQueary this afternoon, and then aired a 22-second clip of Armen Keteyian confronting the subject on his front porch. Early in the day, Keteyian had tweeted out that on CBS's evening edition, "M...
Great Man Mike Krzyzewski Defends Great Man Joe Paterno
Great men must stick together. Their greatness unites them—especially if, like Mike Krzyzewski and Joe Paterno, they've recorded a 90-minute nationally broadcast television special celebrating their mutual greatness. ...
The Saddest Sad Faces Of Sad Penn State Bros
Bros, we must mourn. The greatest bro of all, Joe Paterno—whom one could affectionately refer to as Bro Paternbro—has been fired as head coach of PSU football. Life will never be the same, bros. Football will never be so pure again. Hang your head, remove your backwards New Era cap, and say a prayer...
PSU Students Will Be Able To Indulge In Their Heartbreak At Tonight's Drake Show
It is a proven equation by now that when distraught college students face difficult times, they turn to cheap liquor or light beer and music by Drake....
The Strange Details Of The Phone Call That Made Joe Paterno's Termination Official
When Joe Paterno emerged from his house on McKee Street last night to address the gathered students and supporters, he mentioned, as he struggled to thank them for showing up, a phone call: "I'm out of it, maybe, now," he said. "That phone call put me out of it. But we'll go from there, OK?"...
Watch All 22 Uncomfortable Minutes Of The PSU Trustees' Presser Announcing Joe Paterno's Dismissal
John Surma, CEO of U.S. Steel and vice chairman of Penn State's Board of Trustees, sat through a hell of a press conference this evening. The gathered media did not practice anything resembling neutrality—wait until after Surma makes the initial statement for things to heat up—and it ended with lo...
Penn State Students Flip Over A TV News Van In Solidarity With Incompetent, Morally Complicit Old Relic
Via @jon_wertheim, whose feed is worth following if you're into campus vandalism....
Joe Paterno's Coaching Career Is Over
Per Jim Gardner of 6ABC in Philly, the Penn State Board of Trustees has voted to remove Joe Paterno immediately. Longtime assistant coach Tom Bradley will take over as Paterno's interim replacement. A press conference is scheduled to begin any minute. We will update accordingly. [@Jim_Gardner]...
<em>New York Times</em> Reports Penn State Ready To Oust Paterno
The Times's Happy Valley duo just dropped this report: "Joe Paterno's tenure as coach of the Penn State football team will soon be over, perhaps within days or weeks, in the wake of a sex-abuse scandal that has implicated university officials, according to two people briefed on conversations among t...
Shitty <i>MNF</i> Game To Be Matched In Shittiness Only By Shitty <i>MNF</i> Intro
Doing a new one every week could be a good thing. Detroit! Blue collar town. Oh look, there's Barry Sanders! So what does the New York metropolitan area get for Monday's suckfest against the Dolphins? Fireman Ed, and "the passion and loyalty of the fan base." [Newsday]...
The Irish Can Still Qualify For Euro 2012 Thanks, In Part, To This Armenian Own Goal
Back in 2009, the Republic of Ireland missed out on a World Cup invitation courtesy of a Thierry Henry handball. That didn't go over very well....
Hank Williams Jr. Gets Much-Needed Public Support From Kid Rock
Detroit native Kid Rock celebrated in the Lions' locker room after their 24-13 win on Monday Night Football last night. "I'm Detroit 'til I die," he told gathering reporters....
Hank Williams Jr. Has Recorded A Rollicking Obama/<i>Fox & Friends</i>/ESPN Diss Track Called "Keep The Change" (Updated)
You know what's inherently lame? Country music battle songs. In aggressive country music battles, the only gauge for how "bad" someone is is how angrily they can say "America" or "U.S.A." while still maintaining a legitimate twang. Nevertheless, disgraced "Are You Ready For Some Football?" singer ...
ESPN Cuts Ties With Hank Williams Jr., Which Is Like The Nazis Breaking Their Non-Aggression Pact With The Soviets
Says ESPN, regarding Hank's analogizin' the other day on Fox and Friends: "We have decided to part ways with Hank Williams, Jr. We appreciate his contributions over the past years. The success of Monday Night Football has always been about the games and that will continue."...
A Handy Map Of Where To Burn Your Couches When WVU Beats/Loses To LSU
Before the season began, WVU and Morgantown officials decided to crack down on the Mountaineer tradition of burning couches after big wins (and big losses). They aren't kidding around, making the celebratory pyre a felony arson charge. The new rules face their greatest test Saturday night, as No. 2 ...
Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor
Ladies and germs, I give you Richard Griffin: "As for my view on the new generation of baseball statistics, I will just quote from the legendary R&B and soul icon Edwin Starr and his hit song for the Temptations: 'War, huh, good God. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. Listen to me.'" [Toronto ...
Here Are A Bunch Of Photos Of A Fiery NHRA Crash
Photographer Mark Rebilas sent over these bad-ass shots of NHRA Pro Mod driver Roger Burgess totally wrecking his '67 Firebird ride at 220 mph after crossing the Bristol Dragway finish line. Dude's a 60-year-old millionaire, says Rebilas, so $100,000 loss ain't no thang. If this is your type of thi...
Buckeye Voices: "You Guys Remind Me Of Some Tackhead Teenage Broads With Tissue Stuffed In Their Bras"
On Monday, as Jim Tressel announced his resignation, we brought you Buckeye fans' rage-filled tweets at Ray Small. They were so angry at Small for speaking to the Ohio State student paper, The Lantern: He told them that some players "don't even think about [NCAA] rules."...