fl Page 1154 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Grossman Heroically Leads Bears To Another Victory
Tidbits and info smidgens from Week 12 in the NFL ......

The Patriots Are, For One Night, Almost Mortal
The Eagles might have fallen just short tonight, but three important things happened....

Eagles, Patriots, Roughriders And Bombers
The biggest question regarding tonight's Eagles and Patriots game (8:15pm, NBC) isn't whether the Pats can keep their perfect season run alive. They will. It's whether or not this inevitable gong show will resemble anything even close to a competitive football game. It probably won't....

Setting The Four O'Clock Table
Denver at Chicago, CBS: The last time these two met, in 2003, the Bears defeated the Broncos with four field goals and a Kordell Stewart 1-yard touchdown run. Slash! Wow. There's a name I haven't heard since The Balls and Leitch got their Joe asses handed to 'em. Hey, crazy question: could he possib...

Footbaw!
Type "Giants fan" into Google Images and that's one of the first images to grace your 15-inch monitor. Seems about right. Eli Manning is 6-for-garbage, with two interceptions. He threw four picks in his last meeting against the Vikes, so he's right on pace. Minnesota 24, New York Giants 7....

It's One O'Clock And Here Is Vinny
New Orleans at Carolina, FOX: Here's what I want you to do. Go grab a permanent marker. Find one? Good. Now walk over to your hi-definition television and write "MUST WIN!" all over the screen. Really fill the space. There you go. Done? You're welcome....


Jon Kitna Has Good Reasons To Love God
After the Lions' loss to the Packers yesterday, reporters asked Detroit quarterback Jon Kitna what he was thankful for. As everybody now knows, Kitna wears his Christianity on his sleeve. And we really have no problem with that....

Floyd Mayweather Knows How To Promote Fights To Heterosexuals
We're a couple of weeks away from Floyd Mayweather-Ricky Hatton fight, and, you know, it should be a good, as far as boxing goes these days. And the fight is no longer lacking the appropriate amount of hype. Why? Because Floyd Mayweather's war of words begins with anal rape....

Thanksgiving Games As Uninspiring As Always
As usual, the Thanksgiving Day slate of games yesterday was hardly compelling. All three games were blowouts, and it's never a positive sign when the most dramatic moment involves the phrase, "hey, the Lions are within 15 now!"...

Welcome To The Land Of Turducken
Prepare for this exact scene tomorrow: Brett Favre eating turkey and receiving backslaps on the Lions' home field. (We're not sure, but we believe this picture was taken in 1983.)...

Thanks Again, Priest Holmes
It's a sad day, folks: It looks like Priest Holmes is going to retire. Obviously, the brief snapshots of Priest Holmes we've seen this season haven't even remotely resembled the Priest Holmes fantasy wunderkind we once knew, but that doesn't mean we didn't enjoy them immensely. It was just nice to s...

The Eagles Are HUGE Underdogs Sunday
We were pretty amazed to read this this morning: Apparently Sunday night's Patriots-Eagles game has the biggest spread in NFL history. (Well, not exactly: They're not counting expansion teams, for some reason; the Buccaneers were 24-point underdogs to the Steelers in their first season, and lost 42-...

Jamboroo, Week 12: A Special, Comprehensive Breakdown Of Thanksgiving From An Experienced Fat Person
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon. Except for today, because we're off tomorrow, because it's Thanksgiving....


This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...

Andrea Kremer Hearts Tom Brady
It's a few days old now, but, OK, judging from this "interview" from Sunday, it's only a matter of time before Andrea Kremer, Gisele and Tom are all on the Dr. Phil show hashing this out. Such shameless flirting has not been witnessed since Churchill got Roosevelt to agree to the lend-lease program...

Vick Just Can't Wait To Get Himself To Prison
We didn't get into this yesterday, but all told, we find it pretty amazing that Mr. Mexico has decided to check into jail three weeks early. We understand that it's a plan to look contrite in front of the judge ... but it's still taking quite a risk, wethinks....

That Gripping AFC West
We will confess, we did not watch the Monday Night Football game last night; we had a concert, the Illini were on and, frankly, we're gonna get enough football in the coming days. But we take solace in knowing there's a division worst than the Buzzsaw's NFC West....

Here We Are, Back In Denver Again
Jeez, didn't Denver just host a "Monday Night Football" game? That's right, they did, just three weeks ago, in the game when Brett Favre made everyone all weepy again. We thought we remember that....