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NFL Week Three, Update #1
• The Steelers/Bengals game has been an entertaining contest thus far, despite CBS's efforts to make it as lame as possible. There was some pre-game trash talk between Joey Porter and Chad Johnson that appeared to be clearly staged. It took place in a camera-friendly location, and the trash talk was...

Your NFL Games Of The Week
• Cincinnati vs. Pittsburgh. I've been looking forward to this game more than any other this weekend, college or pro. You've got Joey Porter and Chad Johnson talking trash back and forth, with T.J. Houshmandzadeh getting in on it... it's Carson Palmer's revenge game against the team that crippled hi...

Week 3, Previewed The Tecmo Way
When we go through our Friday selection of various weekend previews, we hit the usual suspects (King, Simmons, Zimmerman, O.J.) and then always make sure to drop in on The Ex-Burgher's Tecmo Bowl previews. Essentially, he uses the Tecmo Bowl prototype (with updated rosters!) from the Tecmo Super B...

Chad Johnson, Perhaps Unaware Of His Surroundings
So remember that hit Chad Johnson took at the end of the Bengals-Browns game last week? Well, over at The Fanhouse, the omnipotent Mighty MJD found the video of Johnson's postgame "discussion" with reporters. We think maybe he wasn't quite ready for an interview yet....

Do Not Disrespect Joey Porter's Dogs
Some difficulty for Pittsburgh Steelers unhinged linebacker Joey Porter this morning; apparently two of his dogs — a pit bull and a mastiff — escaped from Porter's residence and killed a miniature horse at a nearby farm. The horse, being miniature, was actually smaller than each of the dogs, so that...

He Actually Will Wear A Leather Helmet
Need to be reminded of just how old you really are? Old Falcons kicker Morten Andersen, considered one of the best kickers of all time, last made a Pro Bowl in 1996. The guy was an All-American kicker for Michigan State in 1981....

The NFL Doesn't Want You To Get Drunk
So the NFL is running a contest called Take A Player To School Day, which encourages kids between the ages of 6 and 12 to apply for a player to accompany them to school....

Look Inside Big Ben. WAY Inside
Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger made his return from an appendectomy — and, ostensibly, from that little head-vs.-pavement business — last night, and it didn't go well, with the Jaguars shutting out Big Ben and the Steelers 9-0 on Monday night. It was the lowest scoring game in Monday Night ...

David Akers, Kicker Badass
If you needed any more proof that Philadelphia Eagles kicker David Akers is ready to take on all comers, we present David Akers ... kickboxer! We suppose, if you're kicking for a living anyway, you might as well figure out how to kick, you know, humans....

A Day At Paul Brown Stadium
So, we are sad to report that we did not make it to Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson's dramatic interpretation of the chicken dance at Cincinnati's Oktoberfest on Saturday afternoon; we figured by the time we actually made it downtown, we'd be too far away to see anything but the tip of Johnson's ...

NFL Roundup: Take Solace In Akers
Observations and tidbits from a day of football ...>...

NFL Week 2: Update #4
Denver 9, Kansas City 6. This wasn't football, this was a crime against football. I shouldn't even mention it here. Three hours of straight boredom. And since I don't want to talk about it, let me just mention this: I have three QBs on my fantasy roster: Chad Pennington, Rex Grossman, and Jake Plumm...

NFL Week 2: Update #3
Tennessee 0, San Diego 17. And it's not really as close as the score would indicate. Kerry Collins and Vince Young have booth seen time at quarterback, and honestly, the Titans might be better off just playing without a quarterback. Lure Eric Crouch out of retirement, and run the option....

NFL Week 2: Update #2
Detroit 7, Chicago 34. And welcome back to the Detroit Lions. All that Week One optimism looks a little misguided at this point. Not that they're destined to be as bad as the Raiders or anything, but they're still 0-2 and just got their asses beat by Rex Grossman (20-of-27 for 289 yards and 4 TDs)....

Michael Irvin, Koren Robinson, And Ricky Williams Have A Song For You
Click icon to play video ...

NFL Week 2: Update #1
Cleveland 3, Cincinnati 14. Chad Johnson caught a touchdown pass for the Bengals, and followed it up with... the chicken dance. The era of awesome touchdown celebrations may be officially over. When we're doing dances that are designed for white people to do at weddings, I think we're in trouble. I ...

NFL Week 2: Things You'll Want To See
Oakland @ Baltimore. This game should answer some questions on exactly how bad Oakland could be. I really believe that they've got the potential to be one of the all-time legendary disasters in sports history. A key to this, though, is keeping Aaron Brooks healthy. They can't reach the depths they'r...

Never, Ever Bet On The Texans
In the wake of last week's free-furniture-if-the-Bears-shut-out-the-Packers promotion in Chicago, the folks at Gallery Furniture, the huge Texas furniture place that even hosts a bowl game from time to time, has decided to push all its chips to the middle of the table, 10-gallon hat style....

Imagine What They'll Call It When They Actually Use It
Far be it from us to pretend to be experts in branding, but this new marketing gimmick for the Cleveland Browns, obviously a "riff" (and "riff" is being generous) on the Steelers' Terrible Towel, is actually called The Dirty Brown Towel....

OK, We Get Dibs On The Vikings
For those who find the pace of Madden '07 a little too frantic, here's some good — that is to say, fake — news. Introducing Madden Bye-Week '07, in which you control your various NFL players' off-the-field activities during their team's bye week. We're still waiting for our copy, but the "reviewer" ...