florida Page 54 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Deep Inside The Yankee-Marlin Fan Brawl
We received some new "information" about the Yankee Fan-Marlin Fan fight video you all enjoyed so much, and while we didn't really confirm any of it, it's only fair to (sorta) tell at least one side of the story....
Florida Puts Bulletin Board Material On Actual Bulletin Board
What's the secret to winning back-to-back BCS Championships? Photocopying anything anyone ever says about you and putting it on a giant freakin' wall, obviously. Oh, and some magic markers would help....
Yankees-Marlins Fan Brawl Reveals Truth Of The Human Condition, With Punching
YouTube is filled with grainy cellphone videos of drunken bleacher brawls, but few capture the drama, action, suspense, and heartbreaking childhood trauma of this donnybrook from the Yankees-Marlins series. It's like the Citizen Kane of stadium fan fight clips....
Florida Gators' Go-To Lawyer Has Some Issues Of His Own
The Orlando Sentinel, still tub-thumping about those miscreant Gators, has profiled attorney Huntley Johnson, who often handles the players' legal run-ins. What the paper doesn't mention: Johnson once suggested that his secretary "get down" on his "hog" and "honk it."...
A Lesson In How Not To Spin, Courtesy Of The Florida Gators
Twenty-four Florida Gators have been arrested since 2005, a number of such apparent talismanic significance that the Orlando Sentinel decided to publish a "database." The school, understandably peeved, responded with a master class in how not to respond....
Not Even Tasers Can Stop The Gators
Florida's starting cornerback Janoris Jenkins had a brainstorm this weekend, powered by a few thousand watts of taser juice courtesy of the local police. As if that could ever slow down a Gator superstar....
Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before
Ohio State faces a team from the South in the postseason, loses 37-6. Wait ... this story isn't a repeat? And it was actually a baseball game? Oh, that's unfortunate. [Rumors and Rants]...
Florida State Takes Strong Stance On Chair-On-Face Violence
Florida State wide receiver Richard Goodman was arrested and charged with a felony for that on campus brawl last fall and has been suspended from the team. Oh, so suddenly the Seminoles doesn't want their players hitting women in the face with chairs? Sheesh, make up your mind. [Orlando Sentinel]...
'Whole Lot Of People Puckered Up' After Florida Steroid Bust, Says Comical Backwoods Sheriff
What happens when you mix steroid hysteria with two self-aggrandizing backwoods halfwits on either side of the law? This: "What investigators aren't sure of is whether Richard Thomas, 35, is telling the truth when he said ... he sold mostly to professional athletes," specifically those on the Capita...
Tim Tebow Turns Away Hotter Stuff Than You Can Dream Of
Percy Harvin, presented without comment: "If I could trade places for a day with anyone: Tim Tebow....We saw all kind of actors and news reporters just kind of blatantly say, "Tebow, I want you." And he turned them down. I'm looking at him, like, "Man, you are crazy." [Pioneer Press]...
What's A Little Theft And Fraud Between Teammates?
Anthone Lott is a Florida Gator through and through. He's so devoted to his alma mater and his former championship teammates that when he wants to swindle someone in a crooked construction deal, only fellow Gator cornerbacks will do for marks....
All Big East Baseball Games Now Decided By Dance Off
Connecticut and South Florida squared off in a classic Big East baseball tilt—or they tried to before a five-hour rain delay. So how do you kill time during the one thing more boring than Big East baseball? Simple: Worst community theater production of "West Side Story" ever....
Rookie Millionaire Versus Obsessive Super Fan - Who Ya Got?
Last Wednesday, Marlins' rookie Chris Coghlan hit his first career homerun. He didn't anticipate trouble getting the ball back. Then again, he also didn't anticipate it being caught by professional ballhawk "THE HAPPY YOUNGSTER"!...
Urban Meyer Demands Your Eternal Loyalty
Urban Meyer doesn't care how many Florida passing records you set—that was like last century!—if you want to be a Gator, then you shut your mouth and know your role....
Local Baby Unimpressed By Heisman Winner's Wristband Collection
Legend says that anyone who touches Tim Tebow before their first birthday gets free tuition at Florida. More notable: Tebow is wearing seven inspirational wristbands (and a rubber band)! Live strong, indeed. [The Smiths]...
The TeeBow Will Be In All The Ladies' Pants This Fall
I don't even want to contemplate the number of licensing agreements that are being violated here, but Tim Tebow-inspired ladies underwear is now available. I hear they come pre-soaked. (Sorry.) [TeeBows; via Deuce of Davenport]...
Isiah Thomas Gets Right To Work Crushing Young Men's Dreams
High school forward Chris Rozier was set to sign up with Florida International's basketball program until a change came in the coaching staff. That new coach's first order of business? Withdrawing Rozier scholarship offer....
Isiah Thomas Promises No More Sex Harassing, Suicide Attempts, Personal Salaries
In the latest installment of the Isiah Thomas career makeover, our hero magnanimously told the assembled press corps that his first year's salary as coach of FIU will be given back to the school....
Florida High School Pitcher Loves No-Hitters, Beef O'Brady's
Either Patrick Schuster is really good, or the high school teams in the Tampa-St. Pete area totally suck. At any rate, the Mitchell High hurler now has three consecutive no-hitters....
Isiah Thomas Is Florida International's Problem Now
Florida International stinks at basketball, so I guess they figured—if we're going to stink we might as well leave a spectacular stench all over the basketball world. That's the only explanation for hiring Isiah Thomas....