football Page 704 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

You Got Served
When it comes to high school sports, I'd much rather be on the football field in pads where it's safe, rather than face the sneaky, vicious wrath of the cheerleaders. It happened in Texas (of course), where members of an El Paso high school cheerleading squad baked up a batch of cupcakes for cheerle...

Please Do Not Approach The Tigermobile
This is purported to be the sweet ride of one Willy-Mo, aka William Moore, senior safety for the Missouri Tigers; although judging from the photo below, it may be someone else's. At any rate, I don't know where this was taken, but it doesn't seem like it's a great part of town. In fact, according to...

There's No Recession For Vicious Youth Football Hits
There seems to be an alarming number of youth football players getting flat out owned these days. Or maybe there's just an alarming number of parents who document their child's every move and then upload their humiliation to YouTube. Either way, undersized children are getting absolutely destroyed ...

This Is Not A Place Either Of Us Want To Be, And For That I Am Sorry
Daulerio asked me to describe my experience at the Rick's Cabaret on Monday night. This is probably the best I can do. Strip clubs are not about decadence, or fantasy, or even commerce. They are, at their core, about interaction. The dance is not delicate, or disguised. This is not a place where som...

University Of Georgia Girl Vs. Bathroom Stall ... The Final Conflict
Of all the titanic college football matchups — like Ohio State vs. Michigan, Miami vs. Florida State, Texas vs. Oklahoma — there is one that is often overlooked. It's University of Georgia chick vs. bathroom stall. Come with us now into the women's restroom at Sanford Stadium, where the age-old conf...

There Are More Favres Around Than You Think, America
Yes, Dylan Favre here, a junior at St. Stanislaus High in Mississippi, is related to Brett Favre. He's a nephew, and evidently pretty good, for his size. Favre the Lesser set the state's single-season record for TD passes at 43 last week in his team's regular-season finale, throwing for five scores ...

Obama Received No Mandate In Death Valley
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject : Morning crap Lest we think that LSU fans were totally focused on hating Nick Saban and Alabama this past Saturday, please remember that The Pelican State is also very red. Can a lone fan cry ou...

Ha! I Can Never Be Tackl ... Ohhh, Mommy!
This youngster here is obviously a fan of the classic, straight-ahead running style of now-retired Dolphins running back Larry Csonka. Ouch. I should have listened to mom when she suggested beginning golf. The question is, which hit was bigger: This one, or the one levied by the Eagles' Chris Goc...

College Football Roundup: The Hailey and Hanna Nutt Edition
In honor of BCS clarity arriving (thanks to Iowa we now know that the Big 12 will play the SEC for all the gold in Zimbabwe—that isn't already smuggled to Zurich), we bring you two striking young lasses who recently transferred from Arkansas to rejoin their daddy at Ole Miss. Meet Hailey and Hanna ...

Alabama-LSU: A Friendly Game Of Murder
What a game, huh!? The No. 1 team in the country was taken to overtime on Saturday, the atmosphere was electric, clothes were burned and everyone had a good old SEC time! Well, except for a couple of LSU fans who maybe got a little too carried away by the emotions of the day and ended up the victims...

Offer LSU Kids Free Beer And They'll Burn Anything
On Saturday we posted about LSU fans burning Nick Saban in effigy, which seemed rather hateful and extreme, even for them. Turns out, though, that it was all a promotion for a Baton Rouge condominium company, which provided free food and beer for the students to show up. Corporate schmucks promote h...

SNF: Can Philly Get Over The Hump In The NFC East?
People continually point to the NFC East as pro football's best division, and they should. Theso-called "Black and Blue" division features four well-run organizations with rabid fanbases and a clear priority set on not only winning on the field, but running their teams better than anyone else in th...

HS Championship Game Delayed Due to Lack of Referees
Sure, game officials are the bane of existence and they're all out to cheat for the other team and they're incompetent and corrupt and love being the center of attention and cause eczema in laboratory rats. However, unless someone figures out how to call their own 12-men-on-the-field penalties, you ...

Have You Burned Your Former Head Coach In Effigy Lately?
We didn't get to this yesterday, but anything involves college students and fire is usually good copy for the next day. Some of the LSU peeps got together for what looked like a bonfire with a set of clothes as a centerpiece. But it was actually a burning in effigy of former LSU head coach Nick Saba...

Texas Tech Sticks Up Cowboys, BCS Picture Looks Surprisingly Stable
No. 2 Texas Tech 56, No. 8 Oklahoma State 20. Could Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree actually split the Heisman? Harrell completed 40 passes for 456 yards and 6 TDs. Ten Red Raiders caught at least one pass, including Crabtree, who caught 8 passes for 89 yards and three TDs. The win should cemen...

Saturday Night Live Blog: #9 Oklahoma State at #2 Texas Tech
The Big XII has thirteen teams in the Top 10, and this is just another night in which two of them square off on a Saturday night. The undefeated Red Raiders get their second straight prime-time big game against the once-defeated Cowboys. Brent Musberger and Kirk Herbstreit brand cows with their init...

Install Texas Stadium End Zone in Your Back Yard (Cheerleaders Included)
In a blatant effort to rearm the Salvation Army in order to fight street to street in the urban centers and rural battlegrounds of America, Jerry Jones and a Coalition of the Willing to Appear Charitable in a Very Public Fashion have offered a unique combination of the gauche and the gaucho to the w...

New York HS Team Beefs Up At QB
Usually, "freak of nature" is a moniker reserved for an overly-gifted athlete with little regard for his teammates or the intricacies of game. But Ellenville (NY) High's Tony Casamento is a little bit different. Tony has to be the heaviest quarterback in America, checking in at a svelte 309 pounds. ...

The College Football Playoff You've Been Pining For? It's Happening Right Under Your Nose
For those of you that clamor for a nice, tidy bracket of four, eight, or 16 teams in the last week of November, pay attention. That method of eliminating teams from consideration of BCS Championship goodness has been transpiring over the past few weeks. Ohio State is veritably eliminated after their...

How Much Do LSU Fans Hate Nick Saban? The Coonass Bowl Is Upon Us
Wright Thompson of ESPN hung out with some LSU fans two weeks ago for the Georgia-LSU game. Not surprisingly LSU fans were focused less on Georgia and more on their hate for Nick Saban. The result is a rollicking story of what happens when you get dumped for a hated rival and then your former coach...