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I Believe The Children Are Our Future
The nation is in safe hands, everybody....

Donald Trump Uses <i>Fox & Friends</i> Appearance To Burn Tiffany Trump One Last Time
Earlier this morning, Donald Trump stopped by one of his favorite cable TV haunts, Fox & Friends, for one last campaign call-in. Also on the docket: Burning his very own daughter. ...

Joe Theismann Joined Fox News To Talk "Redskins." It Went Poorly.
There are certain moments in life in which a person or group of people say something so dumb, that no matter how wrong or stupid it may be, you can’t look away. Today, Fox News provided us with one of those moments. ...

Last Night's <i>Hannity</i> Just Couldn't Stop Talking About Ballsacks
It's no surprise Ballghazi is taking over the cable news airwaves, but the national nets have sadly been too humble or afraid to utter the necessary term "ballsack." American patriot Sean Hannity's program is the home of real talk, though, and last night they just couldn't stop talking about ballsac...

Fox Business Delivers Stupidest Super Bowl Report Possible
Fox Business Network attempted to report on Super Bowl ticket sales today with threats that "the NFL is expecting record-low attendance." That's not true, but somehow what reporter Elizabeth MacDonald went on to say got even stupider....

Video: Bad Things Happening To TV Reporters In Ferguson
Television reporters who braved live coverage last night from Ferguson faced attacks from police (with tear gas) and protestors (with rocks and other objects). Here are some examples we witnessed last night....

<em>Fox & Friends</em> Idiots Discuss Ray Rice, Crack Some Jokes
The permafaced dipshits who comprise the cast of Fox & Friends decided to carve out a minute of this morning's show to talk about Ray Rice knocking out Janay Palmer in an elevator. They decided to end the segment with some jokes....

<em>Fox & Friends</em> Host Has Annoying Question For Mo'ne Davis
Mo'ne Davis, the 13-year-old girl who led her baseball team to the Little League World Series by being awesome and striking fools out, was a guest on this morning's episode of Fox & Friends. Naturally, co-host Eric Bolling seized on the opportunity to be annoying....

Bill O'Reilly Questions John Calipari On "Hip-Hop, Rap Stuff, Hustlers"
Kentucky head coach John Calipari appeared on The O'Reilly Factor tonight on Fox News, and managed to keep his cool despite a series of leading questions about the ability to maintain discipline in a "coarser" age of "rap stuff," "hip-hop stuff," and "hustlers."...


Here's Roger Goodell Spinning A Yarn About Player Health
Roger Goodell appeared on Fox News Sunday with Chris Wallace and covered a wide range of topics. They discussed the weather, The Big Game, international expansion and, finally, player health. Notably, the Commish never uttered the words "concussion" or "head injuries."...

Split-Screen Is Not Always The Best Option For Breaking News
h/t to Andrew...

<em>Fox & Friends</em> Anchor Throws Basketball Into Baby's Face
And not just any baby! No, this is the very same baby whose awful shooting form somehow turned him into an internet sensation a few months ago....

Here's How Every Network Announced Dzhokar Tsarnaev's Capture On-Air
Most of us learned that the manhunt for Dzhokar Tsarnaev was over via Twitter or by listening to online feeds of law enforcement radio. But for those watching at home, the suspenseful moment of his capture—and learning that he was alive—would be a memorable if complicated moment: somber in light of...

Today's Boston Bombing Media Shitshow, In 90 Seconds
Our friends at Gawker already took a stab at this, but we thought we'd condense today's mess of media reporting into something easily consumable for the crowd that may have been working and thus wasn't privy to the disaster taking place on television airwaves....

Sean Hannity Set A Boston Marathon Disaster Montage To Dr. Who Music
We thought it was bad enough when Sean Hannity led off his Fox News program tonight with a montage of Boston Marathon devastation that looked and sounded like the trailer for a Bay/Bruckheimer collaboration. Then we learned where the music came from....

<i>Forbes</i>'s "Best Sports Blogs" Of 2003 Are A Portal To A Time You're Glad You Forgot
The shortest increments of time known to humanity are the following, beginning with the most brief:...

Karl Rove In Denial, Melts Down On Fox News, Attempts To Get Network To Rescind Calling Election
It's been a weird night at Fox News, and it got even weirder in the moments after every network, wire service, and amateur mathematician called the election for President Obama. That's because Fox News contributor Karl Rove—who spent millions attempting to get Romney elected—bizarrely refused to a...

"World Series Shits To Detroit" Declares <em>Chicago Tribune</em>, Fox News, Et Al
Gather ‘round, my little dreamlets. Grandpa's going to sing of the days before every baboon with a wireless connection could vomit up a website and call it news. In those long-forgotten times, human beings would staff publications—magazines and newspapers, chiefly. But as audience habits and adverti...

Miami Fox Affiliate Breathlessly Reports Heat Signing Of Ray Allen They Learned From A Fake Twitter Account
Ray Allen is indeed in Miami talking over a possible deal to sign with the Heat, but the contract's far from signed. Don't tell Miami's Fox affiliate WSVN that, though, as they interrupted tonight's newscast to deliver the breaking news that Allen had signed a three-year, $11 million contract....