france Page 23 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Versus Used A Blue Dong To Explain The Impact Of Headwinds On Cyclists
The Versus coverage team for Stage 5 of the Tour de France set out to describe the effects of the headwinds on lead riders in the peloton today. Explains tipster Jim:...

Joba Will Be Neithuh Startuh Nor Relievuh Fuh A While
Everybody's favorite so-so Yankee swingman, Joba Chamberlain, was diagnosed today with a torn elbow ligament that will likely require Tommy John surgery....

Basketball Training Of The Future Is Terrifying And Nauseating
Our French tipster Antoine sent this in with the subject line "ro basketball team training with robots," perhaps because he's aware of our constant fear of the Robot Uprising. But the Futuroscope that helped Poitiers Basket 86 develop their spatial recognition or some such nonsense doesn't inspire...

Bob Knight Double-Booked His Afternoon Siesta With Mike Francesa's Show Today
Or: the cranky toddler takes his nap. Video via Jimmy Traina's Twitter....

Last Night's Winner: Goat To Hero In Just Two Missed Free Throws
VCU product Jamal Shuler steps to the free throw line with 6 seconds left, his French team up one. What happens next, c'est incroyable....

Yankee Fans Are Completely Reasonable About Signing Derek Jeter
A lovable old man called in to New York sports talk radio to share his thoughts on what the Yankees should give Jeter in his upcoming negotiations. It's naive, and foolish, and probably a pretty accurate microcosm for the fanbase....

Dan Gilbert Is Out Of The Font Closet, And Proud
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Anelka Laughs Snootily At French Ban
After being handed an 18-match ban, effectively ending his international career: "They are real clowns these people. I'm dying with laughter." Meanwhile, Ribery got a 3-match suspension, and is dying with whatever his underage hooker gave him. [AFP]...

It's Okay To Make Fun Of Lance Armstrong Again
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Gross Picking His Nose? Gross Picking His Nose.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

France Comes Up With Highly Symbolic, Largely Ineffective Punishment For World Cup Players
New France coach Laurent Blanc will drop all 23 World Cup players from the team (if only for one game), as punishment for their mini-strike. It should be interesting, as France's U21 side probably could have beaten that World Cup squad. [AP]...

Mutton-Almost-Bustin' At The Tour De France
Alberto Contador came 108 miles closer to winning his third Tour, no thanks to a bunch of of sheep who came out of fucking nowhere to dart across the road in front of the peloton....

Tour De France Rider Has Unrealistic Sportsmanship Expectations
Alberto Contador took the yellow jersey from Andy Schleck in today's Pyrenees stage. Noteworthy is the fact that Schleck is pissed that Contador — and the rest of the field — didn't stop and wait for him while he fixed his bike....

Headbutt Clears Way For Tour De France Stage Win
Mark Cavendish took today's 11th stage, thanks to some well-timed headbutts from teammate Mark Renshaw. Renshaw became the first rider kicked out of the Tour, but it was totally worth it....

Top 15 Cringeworthy Tour De France Crashes
Crashes effectively ended Lance Armstrong's Tour de France this weekend, and they've bedeviled a great many other Tour riders over the years. Our friends at Ranker.com have put together a video listicle of the worst crashes in Tour history....

Tour De France Cyclists Beat Each Other With Bike Wheel
Rui Costa and Carlos Barredo got into it at the finish line of today's 6th stage of the Tour. The spark? A little Road Rash-style elbow to the gut during the race....

Rick Reilly® Talks To Lance Armstrong's Ass Again
Rick Reilly's annual exercise in mistaking Lance Armstrong for Saint Sebastian is upon us, and once again it finds our correspondent at his subject's massage table, taking in the view....

Deadspin Classic: Madness, Glory, And The Self-Correcting Aneurysm
Four years ago, in the World Cup final, France's Zinedine Zidane defended the honor of his whore sister and ended his career in an unimaginably bizarre fashion. Afterward, David Hirshey bid a sad adieu....

Bleusballed In Paris: Laughing Along At France's Implosion With The Happily Unhappy French
Whether in a Parisian bar or at the local office of the Association of the Friends of the Paris Commune, Deadspin foreign correspondent John Harpham found the French delighting ever so Frenchily in their national team's disgrace....

Let's Take A Moment To Enjoy France's Misery
South Africa is the first host nation that failed to make it out of the World Cup's group stage—but even they managed to humiliate the French and send them home amid one last bit of poor sportsmanship. Delicious....