fun Page 6 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Report: Cardinals TE Ricky Seals-Jones Arrested After Hotel Refuses To Let Him Go To The Bathroom
Arizona Cardinals tight end Ricky Seals-Jones was reportedly arrested by Scottsdale Police over the weekend and charged with assault, disorderly conduct, and criminal trespassing. From the information available, the arrest happened for a very dumb reason: He really had to go to the bathroom....

MLB To Become Slightly More Fun, Might Relax Its Footwear Restrictions
As part of its unofficial campaign to introduce more Cop Vibes to every level of the game, Major League Baseball has been on a crusade against experimental cleat designs this year, and has already issued warnings of potential fines to a number of players. According to Yahoo Sports, though, the leagu...

An Extremely Mild And Pointless Defense Of Raisins<em></em>
Your letters:...

Fire Mark Jackson<em></em>
Oh, hello again. Yes, I have returned from my book-writing sabbatical—venturing to the Yukon, wrestling wild salmon, scribbling long paragraphs about the FATE OF MAN on the back of aged moosehide—and am ready to rejoin you, my dearest online friends, once more. I feel refreshed and revigored, if suc...

Can Tom Brady Dunk?
Hello. This is Dave. I am your Funbag substitute teacher. If you’re sorry I’m not Drew, just know so am I. I promise I’m not trying to replace him. But the Minnesota Vikings, am I right? What’s the deal with barbecuing?!?! Fuck John McCain! Anyway, I do most of my work at Vice Sports and have an ind...

North Carolina's Rural Teachers Are Ready To Be Heard
The North Carolina General Assembly will reconvene in Raleigh on Wednesday for a short session dedicated to hashing out the final state budget. Joining them in the state capitol will be a flood of frustrated public school teachers from across the state, all of them on a mission to force the General ...

Down With Decorative Pillows!
Hello and welcome to the Funbag! The last time I filled in for Drew, I took over the sex and fantasy football mailbag that he started for Kissing Suzy Kolber, a poorly named blog of a bygone era. I am presently unemployed, so if Drew turns up dead and I’m writing this column again next week, I didn’...

Do You Look At The Keyboard When You Type?<em></em>
Before we get into this week’s Funbag, I have a highly irritating announcement, which is that I’m gonna take a sabbatical in May. Actually, I was quietly suspended by corporate for pouring a bucket of live carpenter bees down Burneko’s chimney, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is that I’...

Should A Sports Hall Of Fame Have A Maximum Capacity?<em></em>
Before we get into the Funbag, I wanna talk about pizza, specifically this tweet I sent out while I was less than sober: ...