go Page 515 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Watch This Chicago 'L' Train Jump The Tracks And Run Up An Escalator
The other day, a Chicago Transit Authority operator apparently fell asleep, and the Blue Line train she was running consequently jumped the tracks at O'Hare and ran up a god damn escalator, injuring 32 people, causing an estimated $6 million in damage and screwing up commutes all over the city. Here...
Here's Everton's Ross Barkley Dribbling 75 Yards And Scoring A Goal
So, Everton are playing Newcastle today, and midway through the first half, the Magpies took a corner kick that was cleared to Everton's young midfielder Ross Barkley. Then Barkley dribbled all the way down the right by himself, cut left inside the box through Newcastle defenders, and roofed a shot ...
Shaka Smart-To-Marquette Reports Came From Student Journalist
The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel now tells us Shaka Smart is not likely to take the head basketball coaching position at Marquette. Why, then, were TV stations in Milwaukee all breathlessly reporting the breaking news that he'd be the new leader of the Golden Eagles? A source inside one of those newsr...
The NFL Bans Goalpost Dunks
Sometimes, when an NFL player scores a touchdown in a game, he does a fun thing where he jumps into the air and "dunks" the football over the goalpost. Everyone likes it when players do this, because touchdowns are cool and so are dunks and so is watching a football player get really excited about t...
Nancy Grace Derails Oscar Pistorius Analysis With Porn Obsession
An otherwise serious discussion of the Oscar Pistorius murder trial on Good Morning America today barely managed to finish without Nancy Grace hijacking it to talk about the amputee sprinter's porn habits....
The Amazing, Vivid Sports Artwork Of Mickey Duzyj
Mickey Duzyj is an artist and designer living in Brooklyn. The Detroit native's work has been featured in the New Yorker, Rolling Stone, ESPN, Esquire and Grantland. ...
Shaka Smart Not Actually Marquette's New Coach, Despite TV Reports
Here's a sampling of Milwaukee newscasts from this evening. They all assert that current VCU head basketball coach Shaka Smart is taking over for Buzz Williams at Marquette. One problem: that's not true. ...
Grigor Dimitrov Halts Match To Help Ballgirl Overcome By Heat
Bulgarian Grigor Dimitrov called a timeout in his third-round match at the Sony Open yesterday afternoon. He noticed a ballgirl overcome by the 90-degree Miami heat, and escorted her off the court to get treatment. ...
Dickgoal Attempt Fails As Péguy Luyindula Ends Up With Nothing But Pain
You can use a lot of body parts to score a goal: your feet, your knees, your head, et cetera. You can also try using your dick, but it's not likely to turn out very well....
Estonian Soccer Team Plays Human Bowling For Goal Celebration
Nomme Kalju's Hidetoshi Wakui scored a wholly unremarkable goal on Saturday, but made up for it with a winning celebration. Wakui scored the first goal of the Tallinn derby against F.C. Flora, picked up the ball, and immediately began choreographing the bowling pin celebration. It did not disappoin...
Pantsless Degenerate Spotted In Airport
Thoughts and prayers to the poor soul standing behind him at security when he bends down to take his shoes off. ...
Wayne Rooney Scores Goal From 50 Yards Away
Wayne Rooney opened the scoring for Manchester United today with a long-range bomb reminiscent of Luis Suarez's goal for Liverpool two years ago, a 50-yard volley that left NBC's announcers almost at a loss for words. We're sure Rooney's West Ham opponents had a few, though....
Hockey Fight Erupts In, And Around, The Benches
(Update: this is from last year, our bad.) Lost in the madness of March was this little gem from the AHL this week. A fight between the Rockford Ice Hogs and Chicago Wolves, in the final seconds of a 2-1 Hogs win, broke out basically in the Rockford bench and spread to surrounding area. ...
CBS Announcer Andrew Catalon Drops "Polack" On Gonzaga Player
Gonzaga's Przemek Karnowski is from Poland. Late in the Bulldogs' 8-9 matchup with Oklahoma State today, he got fouled several times. CBS announcer Andrew Catalon decided to dub the Cowboys' strategy "Hack-A-Polack."...
The Brewers Are Selling Awful Novelty Shirts
It's hard to put into words the feelings this Carlos Gomez collage stirs. Mostly, I feel shame, embarrassment, and a little anger. And sadness. Shame, embarrassment, anger, and sadness. We can probably include confusion, too. Shame, embarrassment, anger, sadness, and confusion. I feel these things f...
SDSU's Coach Rants Against The NCAA In Postgame Presser
Before his team faced off against New Mexico State at 8:03 local time last night, San Diego State head coach Steve Fisher was told by the NCAA that the losing team would need to leave Spokane, Wash., and head home immediately after the game. By Fisher's calculations, that would have put his team at...
Bystander Videobombs Local News Report By Fondling His Gut
Remember the Truffle Shuffle? Of course you do. Here's a bystander on KTLA in Los Angeles trying to do it behind reporter Doug Kolk, who was in Hollywood tonight covering the premiere of a film about Cesar Chavez....
NMSU Forces Overtime With Long-Range Three After SDSU Turnover
A wild night of overtimes got longer after New Mexico State scored five points in the final 15 seconds to force overtime against San Diego State....
Ottawa's Ales Hemsky Scores One Of The Best Goals Of The Season
Ottawa Senators trade-deadline acquisition Ales Hemsky scored a beauty of a goal in tonight's game against the Lightning. The move is lovely, but the goal in its entirety is better....
High Schooler Shot In Leg, Hits Playoff Game-Winner Days Later
Chicago high school senior Tyquone Greer wasn't sure he could even play basketball again after a bullet went completely through his leg at a neighborhood party last week. But only nine days later, Greer sank the game-winning shot for Orr Academy High School (Ill.) over North Chicago....