golf Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lefty Loses The Scottish Open In Style
I don't follow golf. Never have, only will when I'm older and need a good way to hide from my goddamn wife and kids who won't stop bugging me to take them to the fucking movie theatre to see some shitty ass flick that probably stars Hillary Duff....

Chandler In Tahoe: Tokyo Drift
I wasn't able to take a photo of it so I have no tangible proof, but I swear that this was one of the threesomes during Thursday's final day of practice at the American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament: Cheech Marin, Charles Barkley and Kevin Nealon. If this was part of God's plan, He has just been...

Chandler In Tahoe: The Kevin Costner Photo That Almost Wasn't
Not that this picture is enormously compelling or anything, but since it didn't show up in yesterday's post, I figured I'd try to work out the bugs and give it another shot. Too bad Mr. Costner didn't try the same thing with The Postman....

Chandler In Tahoe: Kevin Costner Always Takes Time For Cheerleaders
The Celeb/Am portion of the Lake Tahoe Celebrity Golf Tournament got underway on Tuesday at Edgewood Golf Course and look, kids! Kevin Costner! After watching Costner for nine holes, I'll go ahead and estimate that the special effects budget for Tin Cup was in the $400 million range....

Chandler: This Year You Are Mine, Dan Patrick
If you are reading this, Dan Patrick, let's clear the air on this interview nonsense right away. To put it bluntly, last year you snubbed me. You were the only player at the Lake Tahoe American Century Golf Championship to do so — I even talked with Mike Schmidt. Mike freakin' Schimdt....

A Bug's Life, If That Bug Is Named John Holmes
The world has long pined for the answer to life's perpetual mystery: Is a Rangers-Orioles game more boring than watching flies screw? Well, an astute reader and his friend attended such a baseball game last night, and saw two horseflies gettin' down and procreating. Judging by these two fans' fixat...

Not Tonight, Baby, I Want To Hit The Green In Regulation
From the Department of News I Could Have Used Months Ago, a recent survey conducted by Lexus says that four out of 10 golfers in the U.S. would give up sex for a month if it meant they would achieve the perfect golf swing. Why a car company is asking these kind of questions, I'm not sure....

Why We Can't Hang Out With Gamblers
At Least Some Poker Players Are Athletes [Shakedown Sports]...

Christie Kerr Is Going To Celebrate
I spent some time watching women's golf this afternoon. This isn't something I do a lot of ... but I was rooting for Lorena Ochoa, who's got a little bit of a reputation of a ... well, a choker, in clutch situations in the majors....

For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
12:00, NBC. Tennis. Wimbledon Coverage. 2:30, TNT. NASCAR. Nextel Cup. Lenox Industrial Tools 300. 1:00, TBS. MLB. Atlanta Braves @ Florida Marlins. 1:00, FOX. Formula One Racing. Grand Prix of France. 2:00, ESPN. Champ Car World Series Racing. Grand Prix of Mont-Tremblant. 3:00, NBC. LPGA Golf. U.S...

Golfers, Getting Huge
MJD told you a little about this weekend, and it's certainly been discussed, but damn: Tiger Woods is really freaking jacked all of a sudden. It has some wondering whether Tiger's appearance is what inspired the PGA to finally instate steroid testing, just a few days after the U.S. Open and after ye...

We Welcome Sam Woods To The Planet
A few months back, our own AJ Daulerio wondered what Tiger Woods would name his impending child. Sadly, Tiger did not go with "Urethra;" instead he went with the boring Sam Alexis Woods. SAW. We suppose it's better than ASS....

It's Good To Have A Golf Champion Actually Look Like A Golfer
Like most casual golf fans in America, we spent most of the day yesterday away from the television but curious if Tiger Woods was going to win the U.S. Open. A victory by anyone else would elicit a shrug; a victory by Tiger would somehow matter more, as if we're enough of an expert in golf to unders...

Ah, Screw Birdies
If you got points for impressive pars, it would've been Tiger Woods' day ... but the man couldn't squeeze a birdie out of his Sunday round to save his life. Angel Cabrera, who shot a very impressive 69, is your winner. Oh well. I'm sure he has a dad, too....

Tiger's Nipples Look Fantastic
Playing alongside Tiger in the day's final pairing, Aaron Baddeley set the tone for the day with a triple bogey. He hasn't been able to stop the bleeding since ... He started at +2, and is now at +8....

I Smell Tiger Tears
Today just feels like a day where Tiger Woods ends up crying. It's the US Open, it's Fathers Day, he's in the final pairing at Oakmont, and he's due to become a father soon. It feels so storybook. Thank goodness Jim Nantz isn't involved ... I don't know if I could take the sappiness....

Another Way To Waste Your Workday
As mentioned in the comments below, if you're stuck at work today and love the U.S. Open, you can pretty much watch the whole thing live in HD on your computer at USOpen.com. We have a Mac, which isn't always the best at playing video, but the reception on this is clear and free of burps....

Your U.S. Open Preview, If You're Into That Sort Of Thing
The U.S. Open, held this year in Oakmont, Pennsylvania (just outside Pittsburgh), begins tomorrow. Last year's winner was Geoff Oglivy, and though everyone always assumes Tiger Woods wins everything he hasn't actually brought home a U.S. Open trophy since 2002. (If you're still counting, he's still ...

John Daly Wants To Make It Clear His Wife Beats Him
Someone asked us the other day: "Why do people care so much about John Daly? He never even wins tournaments. He's not that good." The answer to our question was simple: John Daly is the world's only interesting golfer....