golf Page 70 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ah, Screw Birdies
If you got points for impressive pars, it would've been Tiger Woods' day ... but the man couldn't squeeze a birdie out of his Sunday round to save his life. Angel Cabrera, who shot a very impressive 69, is your winner. Oh well. I'm sure he has a dad, too....
Tiger's Nipples Look Fantastic
Playing alongside Tiger in the day's final pairing, Aaron Baddeley set the tone for the day with a triple bogey. He hasn't been able to stop the bleeding since ... He started at +2, and is now at +8....
I Smell Tiger Tears
Today just feels like a day where Tiger Woods ends up crying. It's the US Open, it's Fathers Day, he's in the final pairing at Oakmont, and he's due to become a father soon. It feels so storybook. Thank goodness Jim Nantz isn't involved ... I don't know if I could take the sappiness....
Another Way To Waste Your Workday
As mentioned in the comments below, if you're stuck at work today and love the U.S. Open, you can pretty much watch the whole thing live in HD on your computer at USOpen.com. We have a Mac, which isn't always the best at playing video, but the reception on this is clear and free of burps....
Your U.S. Open Preview, If You're Into That Sort Of Thing
The U.S. Open, held this year in Oakmont, Pennsylvania (just outside Pittsburgh), begins tomorrow. Last year's winner was Geoff Oglivy, and though everyone always assumes Tiger Woods wins everything he hasn't actually brought home a U.S. Open trophy since 2002. (If you're still counting, he's still ...
John Daly Wants To Make It Clear His Wife Beats Him
Someone asked us the other day: "Why do people care so much about John Daly? He never even wins tournaments. He's not that good." The answer to our question was simple: John Daly is the world's only interesting golfer....
John Daly's Wife: 'No Stabby My Hubby'
We knew that there had to be more to this story ... come on, it's John Daly. And he didn't let us down. apparently....
About John Daly's Stabby Wife...
We are 24 hours in to the story of John Daly getting stabbed by his wife with a steak knife (seen to the left, without knife). Details are sketchy and not necessarily either accurate or in this order:...
It's Almost As If You Shouldn't Make People Play Pro Golf At 13
You know, it's almost as if Michelle Wie was rushed into golf too young and is having a difficult time handling it. Apparently, she had a bit of a meltdown during a Pro-Am on Monday. From The Baltimore Sun:...
The Otters Are No Longer Satisfied With Their Jug Band Christmas
Beware, everyone: The otters have finally had enough of centuries of human dominance and have banded together to destroy us. It was only a matter of time. We welcome our new otter overlords....
Somewhere Out There, There's An Elephant With Your Name On It
A few commenters mentioned this yesterday, and we think it's a fair question: When is it OK to laugh? The guy we wrote about who plummeted 75 feet off a cliff in his golf cart was, after all, a real person, with a family and pets and an active Netflix account. But the first thing we thought of when ...
The Real Tragedy Is That My Cell Phone Was In There
Well, if your golf cart has to plunge off of a gigantic cliff with you in it, we suppose it might as well be in Fallbrook, Calif....
Paul Azinger Demands The Protection Of Shrubbery
Because it's been far too long since we checked in with the "official blog of GCSAA's Golf Course Management magazine," let's do so now. They decided to follow Fred Klauk, the head superintendent at Sawgrass, around for the day....
How Not To Ride In A Golf Cart
It's a beautiful day in New York City today, and though we don't golf, it does seem like a lovely afternoon to be on a golf course. Particularly for a ride in golf cart. Drunk. What could possibly go wrong?...
People Losing Their Life's Savings ... Live On NBC!
It's a logical idea whose time has obviously come: Televised golf wagering. In a move that could only be made by a network desperate after missing out on the Barbaro documentary, NBC is going to televise a full golf tournament made entirely of degenerate gamblers. And Fox is doing it too....
Ripping It And Gripping It With John Daly
A boardroom somewhere in corporate America: "Gentlemen, who better to sell our golf balls than John Daly? And to add color, let's show him brandishing a beer and driving haphazardly in a golf cart!" (Murmurs of agreement). Corporate president: "We'd be idiots NOT to try it!"...
A Brief History Of Sportswriter Gambling
The ombudsman over at The Washington Post is appalled to learn that Post writers have been gambling on The Masters, saying, "maybe the Masters bets next year should be in Oreos, not cash," which, if you've looked at the people covering The Masters lately, is probably what they're spending their mone...
The Golf Horror Film You've All Been Waiting For
In the grand tradition of The Catcher — three strikes ... you're dead — comes Sports By Brooks' discovery of a film currently hitting the festival circuit seeing funding: Slice. Yep: It's a slasher movie about golf. It also has a decidedly inferior tagline: "It's a game you'll play for the rest of y...
Tiger, Or The No Name?
In almost every sport other than golf, we are conditioned to root for the underdog. When it comes down to the final moments, when two competitors face off for the ultimate prize, we feel compelled to get behind the guy trying to win his first title, rather than watching the old champion get another ...
Jesus Wins The Masters
I'd like to credit Zach Johnson for the win, but he keeps giving all the credit to Jesus. Hey, he won it, he gets to choose where the credit goes....