good Page 49 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Angry Sunderland Fans Leave In The First Half, Throw Scarf At Manager
Playing at home against the team a spot below them on the table, Sunderland had the opportunity today to put some distance between them and relegation. Instead, they went down three goals to Aston Villa in the first 37 minutes. Streams of pissed off Sunderland fans stormed out of the Stadium of Lig...

Here's A Bear To Help You Rise Above The Bullshit
How's your week been? Unless you're, like, George Clooney, you've probably found yourself muttering something along the lines of, "Man, this is bullshit ..." while dealing with some bullshit. Maybe your boss upbraided you for some crap that wasn't your fault, or maybe you haven't yet gotten your bi-...

Why An Alabama Recruit Is Channeling Zac Efron In <i>High School Musical</i>
You could say Richie Petitbon III's senior year took a dramatic turn....

News Dude Cries At The Sight Of Sharon Van Etten, Is A Good News Dude
Look, man, it's hard to be moved by things these days. Show me something that isn't Russell Westbrook going coast to coast for a two-handed slam in five seconds, and there's a good chance that my response is going to be, "That's butt." The problem is that a lot of things are butt, but what is defini...

Jury Orders NFL To Pay $76,000 To Displaced Super Bowl Attendees
Remember those hundreds of fans who wanted to sue the NFL after being displaced from their seats at the 2011 Super Bowl? Well, a few of them just got a shitload of money from the NFL....

How One Of America's Greatest Sportswriters Disappeared
It was almost endearing how an ink-smudged, deadline-addicted newspaper editor of yore would squint through the smoke from his cigarette and ask a bright young man why the hell he wanted to write sports. An editor like that was usually about as sensitive as a bolt cutter, but he couldn't resist th...

Let's All Be More Like This Large Fellow Who Slapped Joakim Noah's Ass
You might be tempted to call E'Twaun Moore's game-winning three the highlight of last night's contest between the Thunder and Bulls, but I submit that the night's truly transcendent moment occurred on the ensuing possession, when a portly Bulls fan lost all notion of etiquette and got himself a big ...

Vladimir Guerrero Had Hubris, And He Had Balls
The following is excerpted from Jonah Keri's Up, Up, & Away: The Kid, The Hawk, Rock, Vladi, Pedro, Le Grand Orange, Youppi!, The Crazy Business of Baseball, and the Ill-fated but Unforgettable Montreal Expos, a wonderful and definitive account of Montreal's much-lamented baseball team. The book w...

Adrian Peterson Wins Suspension Appeal
Federal judge David Doty has ruled in favor of the NFLPA's motion to end Vikings running back Adrian Peterson's indefinite suspension. The ruling vacates a previous ruling by arbitrator Harold Henderson, who upheld Peterson's suspension back in December....

Soccer Fans Resist Urge To Be Hateful Assholes For Once
Soccer fans are, almost without exception, horrible people. So you can imagine our surprise, if also our reluctance to truly trust, the behavior of these Stuttgart fans, who consoled poor little Timo Baumgartl after a huge mistake lead to an easy goal to all but seal their defeat....

VCU Fans Successfully Pull Off Fake Shot Clock Countdown
The fake shot clock countdown is a staple in college arenas across the country, but it only occasionally works. It's not too difficult for players to glance up at the big shot clock above each basket, and they're usually smart enough not to trust the opposing fans. I'm not positive the VCU fans tric...

Dude Nearly Chokes On Fake Tooth While Filming Himself Play Video Games
I don't totally understand why gamers seem to be so into filming themselves while they play video games these days, but after coming across this wonderful moment in human history, I am very glad that they do so....

No Hitter Has Ever Been More Terrifying Than Albert Belle In This Game
July 25, 1999. Orioles versus Angels in Turn Ahead the Clock Day at Oriole Park at Camden Yards, hence the hideous monochrome sleeveless trashbag novelty jerseys. Albert Belle batting cleanup. ...

Mad Genius Attempts To Smuggle So Many Damn Beers Into Soccer Game
I don't know how much beer costs at a Turkish soccer game, but I imagine the prices are just as exorbitant as they are here, and so I sympathize with this man's desire to sneak his own aclohol into the stadium. I admire his ingenuity as well, as it is no small feat to design an outfit that can conce...

Roger Goodell Was Paid $35 Million In 2013
Commissioner Roger Goodell received $35,017,000 in compensation in 2013, according to the NFL's most-recent tax return, as reported by SportsBusiness Daily. ...

Advice To Mid-Career Journalists
Remember that when you offer young journalists unsolicited advice, it makes you look like an asshole....

Fan's Sign At Capitals Game: "Where Is John Wall??"
As far as I can tell, this picture was taken at Sunday's game between the Capitals and Flyers. ...

Bob Mould On Friday's <i>Letterman</i> Is Better Than Anything On The Grammys
Bob Mould played Late Show With David Letterman on Friday, and rocked so hard the studio started falling apart. It's superior to anything you'll see on the Grammy Awards tonight....