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Gregg Berhalter and USMNT are good enough
In the end, Gregg Berhalter did everything we asked, what most USMNT fans asked. He didn’t treat the trip to the Azteca as something to just get through. It wasn’t just a lottery spin. It wasn’t about keeping the powder dry for Sunday. Berhalter looked at the Mexico squad, looked at his, and thought...
I want my win in the Azteca, Gregg Berhalter
Right off the bat, I know all the logic the US might keep something in reserve tonight at the Azteca vs. Mexico. The USMNT has not been able to thread the three-matches-in-seven days windows all that well. The Panama game is the real crunch one of the three this time, as a win there basically guaran...
Gregg Berhalter drops the ball on USMNT roster
Expected, disappointing. Two words that best describe my reaction to seeing the United States Men’s National Team’s roster for the final trio of octagonal World Cup Qualifying matches, beginning next week. Outside of the core, can’t-miss players and super-subs, which any soccer fan with a brain coul...
With Weston McKennie done for the season… now what?
For as much excitement as this batch of the USMNT has generated, most of that has been tempered by the fact that A) they’ve rarely actually played all that well together and B) they’ve rarely all been together and in anything near top form. There will be those, the most rose-colored glasses-adorned ...
The Beijing Olympics are everything you’d thought they’d be
At least we can say the Winter Olympics are practiced at holding their events in a communist dictatorship, as they’ve held two of the last three in one. We’re just about three or four days into the whole thing, and already the stories of athletes being held against their will, shitty facilities, unp...
OK, maybe it’s time to have a talk about Gregg Berhalter
The natural inclination is to arm the nukes to drop on USMNT manager Gregg Berhalter after his comments that the U.S. “dominated” Canada, despite losing 2-0 and managing just three shots on target. The initial reaction is that he’s completely deluded, doesn’t know what he’s watching, and all while h...
2021 was an incredibly fun year for the USMNT, let’s never do it again
As stated many times before, what the USMNT attempted, and really accomplished, in 2021 is unheard of in international soccer. Turning the entire roster over to children at once just isn’t done. Usually, teams are trying to blend generations, mixing in the aging vets (around 30) with those in their ...
It’s fine, this is fine. No really, it’s fine
In the euphoria of the US’s latest “Dos a Cero” triumph over Mexico, most US fans probably joked with their friends that they would follow this up with a turgid and flat performance in Jamaica. Joke to mask the pain, because we all suspected it, just at differing levels. Maybe some thought they woul...
We said depth would be the main thing
If it feels like World Cup qualifiers are boomeranging right back into your consciousness after not much of a break from the last ones, you’re not alone. This is the normal calendar, you just had a year off from it thanks to the pandemic, but just wait until qualifiers are crammed into January and F...
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times
At halftime last night, you could forgive any USMNT fan for thinking they had never left 1997. I know I did. Here we all were, too late on a school night, watching a US team getting paddled in Central America with the crowd going nuts and the American manager looking utterly clueless and his players...
We totally forgot that this USMNT hasn’t played very well
Perhaps I doomed them last Wednesday when I told my editor the US Men’s National Team would qualify for the World Cup easily. The power of the motherfuck grows every day. That won’t comfort anyone, especially me, as the US has certainly stubbed its toe in its first two qualifiers, even if it hasn’t ...
Mama said there’d be days like this
I kind of knew that being so jonesed about the U.S.’ first qualifier would lead to something of a dry-heave of a game last night. This is CONCACAF, after all. Winning on the road is incredibly hard. It’s even harder when you’re taking a squad full of players that haven’t been on the road in CONCACAF...
It’s showtime!
It’s time to play the music, it’s time to light the lights, it’s time to dodge the bags of piss...wait, those aren’t the original lyrics, are they? Well, for the USMNT they might as well be. ...
With World Cup qualifying imminent, let's check in on how many rakes Berhalter is stepping on
Good God, would someone take the air out Tim Ream’s tires or barricade his apartment door for a couple days so Gregg Berhalter will stop picking him for the national team?...
Hey, Pep — you old scallywag, you old so-and-so — come manage the USMNT
So you need a new challenge in a couple years, Pep? Seven years at Man City will be enough? I agree. Want to try yourself at the international stage? Really all that’s left for you at age 50. Not much left to prove at club level, other than maybe not shitting yourself in the latter stages of the Cha...
I probably owe Gregg Berhalter an apology
You’ll have to excuse me, as I’m writing this Mourning After while giggling incessantly. The U.S. Men’s National C team, B- at best, beat a close-to-full-strength Mexico squad in the Gold Cup Final, 1-0. It was a tournament that manager Gregg Berhalter was using as a laboratory to find out who could...
USMNT finally gets an important win with Yunus Musah
The November friendlies against Wales and Panama could have been the biggest tease ever. They kind of felt like that at the time. It was the first time the US had called together only European-based players, which is what a lot of fans had been clamoring for. After all, who didn’t have fatigue of wa...
Through the fog, there’s finally some light for the USMNT
Maybe having 10 months off from each other is exactly what the U.S. Men’s National Team and their fans needed. The last time we saw the national squad, they were hacking, gagging, and stumbling through the Gold Cup or attempting to play out from the back in another friendly with Mexico with truly di...
The USMNT Is An Absolute Joke, And It's All U.S. Soccer's Fault
There’s a good chance that a significant number of people reading this article weren’t even alive the last time Canada beat the United States in soccer, on April 2, 1985. Thirty-four years later, and almost exactly two years since the atrocity in Couva, the USMNT has once again fallen to our neighbo...
The USMNT Lost The Gold Cup Final, And That's Probably OK
It’s never fun to lose to Mexico if you’re an American soccer fan. It’s doubly painful when it’s in the Gold Cup final, on American soil, as was the case Sunday night, when a 74th-minute golazo by Jonathan Dos Santos gave Mexico their eighth Gold Cup win—and fourth over the United States in a final—...