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Do Violence To A Chicken And Eat Like Royalty All Week<em></em>
Both of my parents are talented, dedicated cooks with demanding law careers. This means that in order to feed themselves and their four kids homemade dinners during the week, they were, without ever calling it that, masters of meal planning. Huge swatches of the weekends were spent on intricate reci...

<i>The Night Of</i> Made Its Characters Morons Because It Kind Of Sucked
Almost every character in The Night Of, the eight-episode limited crime series that wrapped up on HBO last night, acted like a big idiot at one point or another. ...

How To Plan Your Lunches And Avoid Cooking All Week
You would think a single AC unit would be sufficient for cooling the sort of diminutive New York City one-bedroom for which I am currently overpaying. But, alas, despite racking up what is sure to be a reprehensibly reckless utilities bill, it’s still at least a billion degrees in my apartment this ...

Officials Resign After Czech Bowl Ends On Championship-Deciding Blown Call
NFL training camps start kicking off today, but football did not take the summer off. Czech Bowl XXIII, the championship of the Czech League of American Football, was held on Saturday, with the Prague Black Panthers winning their 15th title in a hard-fought 10-9 victory over crosstown rival Prague L...

How To Plan Your Lunches And Enjoy Italian Comfort Food All Week
The tomato sauce that we’re making to go along with turkey meatballs in a couple of meal-planned lunches this week is easy. It is not, however, quick. The recipe actually sounds a little absurd at first: Five pounds of tomatoes, each one chopped, scooped, and grated before you’re even ready to start...

NFL Says Marky Mark Is Full Of Shit, And Roger Goodell Never Called Him To Complain About <i>Ballers</i>
When former Funky Bunch boss Marky Mark claimed to Mike & Mike that NFL commissioner Roger Goodell had contacted him personally to lodge complaints about HBO’s Ballers, we called bullshit. Not only is Goodell too busy with more important things to bother with that kind of task, but even if he weren’...
![Marky Mark Claims Roger Goodell Personally Called Him To Complain About <i>Ballers </i>[UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/uxdawcaxexinokdlxdfw.jpg)
Marky Mark Claims Roger Goodell Personally Called Him To Complain About <i>Ballers </i>[UPDATE]
Yeah. Can you feel it baby? Thus start the lyrics to Marky Mark’s 1991 and only hit “Good Vibrations,” but if the former Funky Bunch leader is to be believed Roger Goodell’s answer is “No. I am not feeling it,” if the inquiry is in regard to HBO’s series Ballers, of which the retired rapper is an ex...

How To Plan Your Lunches And Learn To Love Savory Rhubarb<em></em>
Before this week, I had never eaten rhubarb. This is because I am of the firm belief that any dessert without chocolate is not worth my time and—even though rhubarb is a vegetable and pie is almost universally not worth the effort—people insist on serving rhubarb in pie form. Maybe it’s got somethin...

Bill Simmons's New HBO Show Debuts With Insane Ben Affleck Ballghazi Rant
Any Given Wednesday, Bill Simmons’ new weekly sports talk show, debuted this evening on HBO. It was ... exactly what you’d expect. It opened with a segment on the NBA Finals and LeBron’s greatness (featuring a Teen Wolf comparison less than two minutes in) before Charles Barkley joined the show to l...

How To Plan Your Lunches And Eat Like A Human Being All Week
Meal planning has always seemed to me to represent an aspirational level of Having Your Shit Togetherness. I assume that if I can streamline the whole eating process such that I can do grocery shopping and lunch packing from muscle memory, I’ll be left with more mental energy and money to dedicate t...

Bill Simmons On ESPN: "Who Would Work There That You Respect Right Now?" (UPDATE)
A year after learning on Twitter that ESPN fired him, Bill Simmons is clearly still bitter. “They’ve now gotten rid of everybody who is a little off the beaten path,” he says in a Hollywood Reporter cover story. “Ask yourself this: ‘Who would work there that you respect right now?’”...

Jim Lampley Barely Holds It Together While Closing HBO Broadcast With Muhammad Ali Remembrance
Jim Lampley closed last night’s live boxing telecast with a final word on what Muhammad Ali meant to him—and the world—with an observation about The Greatest that choked up the longtime HBO announcer....

Did The Rams Draft Michael Sam Just To Avoid <i>Hard Knocks</i>?
There are plenty of conspiracy theories surrounding the Rams’ selection of Michael Sam in the 2014 draft, all centering around the NFL’s desire to avoid the PR of watching the league’s first openly gay prospect go undrafted. But this is a new one....

The Saints Are Reportedly Preparing To Be The Subject Of This Season's <i>Hard Knocks</i>
Last season’s Hard Knocks brought us Vince Wilfork showin’ off that bod underneath some overalls, Brian Cushing chucking, and a solid Macho Man impression. The latest team to bring us training camp fights, barfs, and hopefully those two at the same time could be the New Orleans Saints. According to ...

Do Not Post Naked Pictures Of Your Toddler On Facebook
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Can I Be Sued If My Dog Bites A Trespassing Kid In My Own Backyard?
Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, wherein I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below. Today’s query:...

Here's Will Ferrell's At-Bat In <i>Ferrell Takes The Field</i>, Which Was A Drag Otherwise
Spoiler Alert: They don’t really let Will Ferrell pitch in Ferrell Takes the Field, his stunt HBO doc where he plays every position (plus designated hitter) for 10 different MLB teams during one day of 2015 spring training action in Arizona. No, in his 90-second stint with the Dodgers, he throws one...

<i>Ballers </i>Gives Us Mindless Fun, And The Rock's Butt
The first season of Ballers started with a car crash, and its final episode featured Dwayne Johnson’s butt. Between those two important milestones, some other stuff happened. ...

<i>True Detective</i> Season Two, In Two Minutes
True Detective’s chaotic, absurd second season wrapped up last night, but if you didn’t watch—or gave up early into the show’s run—we collected the best scenes from the entire season into a neat, two-minute compilation. This is all you really need to know....