heat Page 71 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stop Shuler Surrenders To The Polls
We have told you before about the noble quest of StopShuler.com, produced by a group of Redskins fans who want to keep their former quarterback — and current Congressional candidate — Heath Shuler from returning to Washington....
See? It's Not So Hard To Get Hired By ESPN
We've mentioned this before, but we have much sympathy for the plight of the veteran female sideline reporter. Lots of these women, Lesley Visser, Suzy Kolber, so on, have been working the NFL beat for years, and not only do you have to deal with Joe Namath trying to lick your face, you have to also...
NBA Roundup: Ring Of Fire
The NBA opened its regular season on Tuesday with two games ... hardly enough to action to get our basketball engines revved. But they did involve the Lakers and Heat, so let's examine Day One with a little tiny NBA Roundup....
Free Darko Previews: Dwyane Wade
As established, we're dangerously close to the start of the NBA season, with all its drama storylines and sturm und drang and months of madness. To us, part of the beauty of the NBA is that its focus, while ultimately on the team, falls on the individual. The plight of one player becomes an epic tal...
Joe Torre Immediately Bought George Tickets to "A Chorus Line"
Pauper Players' Sunday afternoon performance of "Cabaret" was cut short when Department of Public Safety officials responded to a call that a man was suffering from chest pains, DPS spokesman Randy Young said. ...
Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Miami Heat
It's hard to believe, but the NBA season is just around the corner. So come with us now as we present five tiny tidbits on each team, just to get you in the mood. Today we continue with the Southeast Division, so do us a favor and send your tips to [email protected]....
Not Shaq And Kobe AGAIN?
The Christmas Day NBA doubleheader is the unofficial kickoff of the NBA season; it's typically the first nationally televised network game, the league's highest-profile moment, its chance to shine....
A Little Mo' Zo
Alonzo Mourning has announced his intentions to return to the Miami Heat to help Jason Williams and Antoine Walker defend their NBA championship. Mourning was reportedly getting some attention and offers from other teams, including the San Antonio Spurs, but in the end, the allure of playing another...
Championship Parades Are No Fun
We've always wondered what it would be like to go to a championship parade for one of our favorite teams, but every time we get excited about the notion, the bastards go and, say, lose eight games in a row and ruin it for us. But still. We imagine it Albert Pujols riding by in a float, throwing us c...
You Stay White, Miami
At the end of yesterday's victory parade for the Miami Heat, Shaq grabbed the microphone and asked, "Who wanna see Coach Riley dance?" For reasons I can't begin to understand, the people of Miami responded affirmatively, and then the following took place:...
The Faces Of Champions
That's right, folks, the wait is over: Antoine Walker, Shandon Anderson and Michael Doleac are finally champions....
Heat Win First-Ever Title, And Even Cuban's Classy About It
Even though their apparently show their loyalty by dressing up like Klan members — even when they're not actually at the arena in which the games are being played, like in this picture — and even though they don't have an owner whose brain is always on the verge of a noisy (and always smart and en...
And Without Any Further Blowups ... Game 6
Difficult to add much more to everything else that's out there: It's Game 6, the Heat are a game away from winning the NBA Title, Mark Cuban is $250,000 lighter and downright dog-nutty, Dwyane Wade getting his legend on and the referrees looking over their shoulders, making sure no one's got a shi...
Is Mark Cuban Going Insane?
We feel we have to legitimately ask: Is Mark Cuban losing his mind?...
Let Us Now Read From The Book Of Dwyane
Christ loves basketball, of that we're certain. But there is no clue in the scriptures, as far as we can tell, as to which city Jesus would have preferred; Dallas or Miami. We can't really picture Him in either place, quite frankly. But we did find this over on Dave Barry's blog, so all of you Da ...
Howard's Boner (Or, Why Refs Are A Natural Male Enhancement)
Another reason that it would have been more fun to live in the early 1900s rather than now — also on the list: speakeasies, jalopies, no Internet — is the fact that they used the word "boner" to describe embarrassing mental missteps. We wish this were still true today; we'd have Buckner's boner, W...
Heat/Mavs Game Five: The Lack Of Stack
Game Five of the NBA Finals will serve as your capper to an excellent sports weekend. And there's certainly no lack of intrigue for tonight's game. The Heat have all the momentum. The Mavs can't stop Dwyane Wade and his myriad of injuries and ailments. Dirk Nowitzki has gone into hiding. Avery Joh...
Jerry Stackhouse And Common Sense Have Been Suspended
Jerry Stackhouse was found to be in violation of the NBA's strict "Do Not Touch Shaquille O'Neal" policy yesterday, as the league announced that it was suspending him for Game 5 of the NBA Finals. Stackhouse committed a hard foul on Shaq as the big man was driving for a lay-up. Have a look:...
And Here Come The Heat
As True Hoop pointed out this morning, this guy must feel like a complete idiot right now....
Hey, Remember These Guys?
Not to remain so firmly ensconced on the jock of Free Darko, but we're completely fascinated with their McSweeney's column today. Namely: Has anybody noticed that Antoine Walker and Jason Williams are playing in this series? Obviously, Dirk and Shaq and Wade and Cuban are the headliners of the ser...