hi Page 713 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Can't Get There From Here
“It’s not going to change a damn thing,” the President of the United States told an assemblage of news anchors at an off-the-record White House meeting some weeks ago. “But I’m still doing it.” To a certain extent, that groaning is just standard Trump shit—his signature all-caps triumphalism is bala...
Curt Schilling Goes On Radio, Melts Down As He Defends Liking And Sharing Memes
In his sixth go-round, former baseball pitcher Curt Schilling received 60.9 percent in the Hall of Fame vote. He’s on pace to get in within his 10 years of eligibility. (Though this blog argues for his induction, I don’t personally care if he does and hope he doesn’t. Why? Because fuck him, that’s w...
Twenty Years Ago, The Rock Beat Mick Foley About The Head And It Was Fucked Up
What still stands as quite possibly the most viscerally memorable match in the modern history of World Wrestling Entertainment took place 20 years ago this week at Royal Rumble ‘99. How much of a compliment that is depends on your perspective. ...
Louisiana Overturns Bullshit Rule Barring Undocumented Students From Playing High School Sports
It seems especially difficult to find good news for undocumented immigrants right now, but here is something nice. Thanks to intense community involvement and legal push-back, Louisiana’s undocumented students will now be able to play high school sports in the state, after a deeply unpopular rule—wh...
If You're A Kicker Who Needs A Job You Should Think About Visiting Chicago
The Chicago Bears were double-doinked out of the playoffs by placekicker Cody Parkey, who then made an appearance on Today before anyone really had a chance to start feeling sorry for him. The Bears brass seemed pretty pissed about Parkey going on TV, and now he is officially on the hot seat:...
Rajon Rondo Earns Technical With Innovative Free-Throw Distraction
Rajon Rondo has spent much of his career trying to find new ways to make himself the most annoying person on the court. It’s impressive, then, that after 12 years in the NBA he still has ideas as fresh as this one:...
A Bunch Of People Close To The Saints Desperately Want Roger Goodell To Step In And Screw This Up
Late Thursday afternoon, Benjamin Watson put out an all-too-serious complaint about the blown pass interference/unnecessary roughness call the Saints didn’t get in the NFC Championship matchup against the Rams. In a screenshot posted on Twitter, Watson called on commissioner Roger Goodell to step i...
![Thierry Henry's First Managing Gig Has Turned Into A Complete Disaster [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/rnbjg8sd6gvv6oz5uu9v.jpg)
Thierry Henry's First Managing Gig Has Turned Into A Complete Disaster [Update]
Thierry Henry’s managerial career is not off to the best start. The former Arsenal legend took over at AS Monaco in France’s top division back in October, with the club in the relegation zone following the firing of former manager Leonardo Jardim. Henry’s task was straightforward, if not easy: keep ...
Some Peon Tries To Hurt Neymar, Gets Humiliated By Neymar
About an hour into Paris Saint-Germain’s Coupe de France match against Strasbourg yesterday, Neymar was clowning on his inferiors with his imperial dribbling skills, as is his wont. Strasbourg midfielder Moataz Zemzemi must’ve taken Neymar’s casual demonstration of superiority personally, because he...
All Hail The Rafael Nadal Banana Shot
Rafael Nadal gored YouTuber Stefanos Tsitsipas 6-2, 6-4, 6-0 today. Their Australian Open semifinal match took just 1:46, but in that span the winner erected a monument to one of tennis’s historic shots: the Rafa banana forehand. Above is as pristine a specimen as has ever appeared in nature....
Derek Carr Seeks Dana White's Help In Challenging Max Kellerman To An "Octagon Fight"
Let us now embark on a tortuous NFL offseason journey that includes all of our favorite dummies and involves a starting quarterback trying to challenge two-thirds of First Take to an “octagon fight.”...
Let's Just Keep Doing This Shit Forever!
There’s no sense in waiting for it at this point. The New England Patriots, who have been shitting up the mid-winter for sports fans throughout this entire terrible millennium, are not remotely close to going away, not any more than, say, measles or famine are close to going away. They’re a problem,...
The NWSL's Worst Club Is Losing Top Draft Picks Because Of Garbage Management
Last season, the NWSL’s Sky Blue FC limped its way to a 1-17-6 record, landing at the bottom of the league table with a whopping -31 goal difference. Despite having USWNT star Carli Lloyd, the 2018 Sky Blue season was the worst in league history: nine total points, “beating” the previous record of 1...
Young USMNT Hotshot Timothy Weah Just Got To Celtic And He's Already Scoring With Ease
Timothy Weah—18-year-old attacking dynamo for the USMNT and Paris Saint-Germain—recently arrived in Glasgow for a half-season loan with Celtic after a few months spent on the fringes of one of the biggest clubs in the world. Earlier this year, he talked about wanting to spend the first half of the y...
The Lost Generation Has Left The Australian Open And Still Looks Quite Lost
The dominance of the Big Four has stunted the winning potential of a promising crop of men’s tennis players who are good, but not that good. This group of twenty-something not-so-hopefuls has earned the shopworn label “Lost Generation.” ...
Trade Marc Gasol To The Lakers
The Memphis Grizzlies are swan-diving at a high rate of speed to the bottom of the West, and according to ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski they’re finally ready to see about trading away the two aging faces of the franchise, guard Mike Conley and center Marc Gasol. The team would likely need to get a lot b...
Wow: Sean McVay Was At One Point Even Younger Than He Currently Is
This dude looks like a fuckin’ baby with a woeful haircut! Incredible!...
The Oilers Finally Fired Peter Chiarelli, Who Did So Little With So Much
The Edmonton Oilers under GM Peter Chiarelli have been a slow-motion car crash, in that everyone can see—has seen, and has said so!—his bad moves as they’re happening. There is no hindsight involved here. And they’ve just kept piling up....
Sharks Buzzer Beater Helps Net Them A Crazy Win Against The Capitals
The San Jose Sharks and Washington Capitals both decided not to play defense on Tuesday night, and we were all better off for it, as their game ended in a thrilling 7-6 overtime Sharks victory. It was this close, however, to being a 6-5 Caps win on the strength of an Alex Ovechkin hat trick, until t...
The Memphis Grizzlies Are Circling The Drain
Throughout the first half of the NBA season, the Western Conference standings were an intractable mess, with 14 teams all harboring legitimate hopes of nabbing a playoff spot. Young upstarts like the Mavericks and Kings threatened the balance of power, while established playoff mainstays like the Pe...