hi Page 736 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Joel Embiid Announces Plans To Expand His Real Estate Empire By Building Additional Housing Units In Andre Drummond's Cranium

Basketball star and no-rent housing innovator Joel Embiid had a monster game against the Pistons yesterday. And in his 39-point performance—32 of them coming in a scorching first half—Embiid achieved his twin goals of clowning on and growing his real estate investments with his favorite rival/unwitt...

Jets And Dolphins Will Play On The Same Mud Pit Duke And Miami Mucked About In Yesterday

A combination of heavy rain and dozens of large, cleated football players stomping around on it for a couple hours meant yesterday’s Duke-Miami game, played for some reason in the Dolphins’ stadium, took place on top of a surface that looked more like a swamp than a football field. Which is bad news...

Simone Biles Is Now The Most Decorated Female Gymnast In World Championships History

Another day, another record for Simone Biles. Her record-breaking run at the 2018 worlds championships in Doha started with the all-around final on Thursday where she picked up her fourth all-around gold, making her the first woman to do so. She also tied Vitaly Scherbo for most world championship g...

Nebraska Kickoff Attempt Goes Hilariously Awry

Nebraska got off to a surprise start against No. 8 Ohio State on Saturday, striking first off a 12-play drive of 75 yards to take an early 7-0 lead. The Cornhuskers followed this up by immediately giving all of their momentum back to the Buckeyes with this failed attempt at a kickoff....

Shams Charania And His Employers Are Up To Some Sleazy-Seeming Shit With All This Derrick Rose Coverage [Update]

Shams Charania is an NBA reporter for The Athletic and also works as an “NBA insider” for the “digital television sports network” Stadium, which was founded and is co-owned by Chicago Bulls owner Jerry Reinsdorf. An NBA reporter having two different jobs in the same field, one of which makes him the...

It's Not About Perfection

Simone Biles won her fourth world all-around title on Thursday, but not in the way that she or her coaches or her fans had hoped she would. Biles fell on her vault in the first rotation and then fell off the beam in the third. She still managed to pull out the all-around win—her fourth, a new recor...

Will Someone Please Befriend These Sad, Lonely People So The Rest Of Us Don't Have To Deal With Them?

Donald Trump is horrible and disgusting, and the menagerie of melting, gelatinous creatures surrounding him are also horrible and disgusting, but they’re not really new. The behavior they’ve exhibited over the last three years came into focus, in Facebook and before long silences at family dinners, ...

Simone Biles Wins Her First World Title On Vault And Breaks World Championships Gold Medal Record

This might be difficult to believe, but up until today Simone Biles had never won a world championship gold medal on the vault. ...

Roger Federer Put This Serve Directly Into The Garbage Can

Roger Federer has cut an unusual path into the fourth round at Paris: he played just two sets of tennis to get there. He had a first-round bye, then second-round opponent Milos Raonic withdrew from the tournament, and then he defeated the sleepy pirate Fabio Fognini, 6-4, 6-3. So all of a sudden, a ...

Let's Remember Some Candidates: 1992 Election Card Guys

Where Wild Card’s set of trading cards for the 1992 presidential election is concerned, the question is less how the set came to be than why. The how part is easy: Given a smallish photo budget, a sufficiently defective sense of judgment, and no meaningful pressure to sell any of the cards, a compan...

Bol Bol Is Almost Here

Bol Bol is not your average 7-foot-2 basketball player. He is not awkward, not stiff, not gangly. He does not succeed solely on his height—though it certainly helps. He is mobile, and he is athletic, and he is offensive-minded. Physically, his body can’t help but remind you of his famous father. But...

Nick Mullens Kicked Ass And Then Cried And It Was Awesome

Perhaps it was giving too much credit to a pathetic Oakland Raiders squad to have thought that 49ers quarterback Nick Mullens, who started last night’s game despite never having taken a snap in regular-season NFL action, was going to have a hard time. But even though it came against a team as lifele...

Oh Man, De'Aaron Fox Is So Much Fun

De’Aaron Fox spent his Thursday night leading the plucky Kings to a dominant road win in Atlanta. I do not expect you to take that very seriously! There are data points you mark in the The Kings Might Be Good column—a 6–3 record; road wins over the Thunder and Heat; a five-game winning streak; offen...

Markelle Fultz Shooting Form Update: Eschews Hoop

Patrik Laine Came Home And Scored A Hat Trick

Winnipeg Jets wonderkid Patrik Laine has had a bit of a slow start to his third NHL season, earning just five points in his first 12 games and going scoreless in his last five. But a return to his home country of Finland, for a game this afternoon against the Panthers, seems to have jump-started the...

Scottish Soccer Fan Punches Goalkeeper In The Face, While Another Beans Manager With A Coin

The behavior of two asshole fans threatened to ruin the spectacle of yesterday’s Scottish Premiership match between rivals Hearts and Hibernian. One of the assholes punched Hearts’ keeper in the face in the middle of the match, and the other chucked a coin at Hibs’ manager, striking the coach square...

Chris Simms Recalls The Time Vince Wilfork Busted Up His Genitals Real Good

Former NFL quarterback Chris Simms, who famously got his spleen exploded during a game, went on Mike Florio’s radio show today and shared the story of a different time in which he was grievously and spectacular injured by a big hit....

Sorry, Sorry, It's The Election Deadcast

First things first: yes, the Live Deadcast at Headquarters Beercade in Nashville next Monday is indeed happening on the day before election day. Yes, many or most or nearly all of us will be somewhat stressed out as a result of this. And yes, while we’re doing this, pledges made in blog posts are wo...

Former Player Says "Insane" Prep School Coach Mike Woodbury Used To Call Teenage Female Players "Sperm Banks"

Following the publication of an audio recording in which prep school basketball coach Mike Woodbury said, “I’m gonna fuck you in your ass” to one of his former players, other people who played for Woodbury in the past are coming forward with their own stories of his abusive behavior....

What Will It Take To Get Jim Jordan Out Of Congress?

LIMA, Ohio — Within five minutes of meeting Janet Garrett’s campaign team for the first time, I’m asked to help with their speaker set-up. The laptop audio playing the Spotify playlist is coming out of the projector, and they don’t know how to hook it up to the main speaker, where it would be louder...