horns Page 18 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pot, Kettle Continue Historic Feud
Austin American-Statesman columnist (and assumed Longhorn fan) John Kelso breaks out his redneck joke book to preemptively needle Alabama fans. Tough talk from a state that lets steers vote. [Statesman/Huntsville Times]...
Austin Takes The Lead In Menstrual BCS Trash Talk
We're still two days away from the fake National Championship Game, but it's not to early for fans of Texas/Alabama to start hurling gross insults at each other. Unfortunately, Alabama's nickname makes it a little too easy for some....
Single UT Fan ISO Total Whore
You'll find a ton of people begging for tickets to the National Championship Game. But one lonely longhorn has two seats, and just needs a piece of ass to fill them....
Texas Professors See Mack Brown Rolling, They Hating
An unofficial resolution passed by Texas' Faculty Council declares the football coach's $5 million pay package to be "unseemly and inappropriate." Unfortunately, he couldn't hear them as he was trapped under a suitcase full of $50 bills. [Austin American-Statesman]...
Last Night's Winner: Mack Brown
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Texas coach Mack Brown, who is about to get seriously paid. This is what is known as "striking while the iron is hot."...
Friendly Texas-Nebraska "Discussion" Leads To Accidental Death
Two Marines got in a "friendly scuffle" while talking about the outcome of Big 12 Championship Game. Unfortunately, one of them forgot to put down his gun and now the other one is dead. [Sun Journal]...
Texas Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Texas Longhorns, who won the weekend by not having to prove they were better than everyone else. Welcome to college football!...
BCS Chaos Is The Buzzword Of The Weekend
To those of you rooting for the BCS to embarrass itself on a national stage last night, take heart: we are left with the least desirable national championship matchup imaginable....
Longhorn Linebacker Blitzes Woman's Bedroom With His Car
All-Big 12 linebacker Sergio Kindle drove his car into an apartment building last week, and lacking any other options, left the car behind, ran home and went to bed....
Pistol-Wielding Old Man Would Like To Play Through
It is super annoying when you're out on the golf course and the group in front of you is playing very slowly, but I was not aware that I had a "moral obligation to destroy" these duffers with hollow-point bullets....
Travel Tip #14: Never Take A Road Trip With Mack Brown
Texas' Mack Brown was one of the D-I coaches bunking up on that gladhanding Middle East tour this week, and he was kind enough to keep an online diary so everyone could know how godawful it is live over there....
NCAA Tournament - Round Two, Evening Games
What to watch while planning your family vacation to beautiful downtown Baghdad......
NCAA Tournament Live Blog: (7) Texas Vs. (10) Minnesota
Your live blogger for this game will be Wes, a Big XII aficionado. He wrote a couple columns for CollegeHumor before it was cool....
NCAA First Round: (7) Texas vs. (10) Minnesota
East Region: No. 7 Texas (22-11) vs. No. 10 Minnesota (22-10) When: Thursday, 7:10 p.m., EDT Where: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina TEXAS LONGHORNS 1) Foreign Point One thing Texas desperately lacked entering the season was a true point guard. Without a ball handler that could pene...
This Just In: Notre Dame Still On Bubble Despite Several Losses
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Texas And Oklahoma To Settle Their Differences Through Sport
Yes, the Longhorns and Sooners can argue for eternity about who won the Big 12 South this fall, or they can use the entirely different athletic pursuit of basketball to sort it all out....
Carmelo Anthony's Curious Love Of The Longhorns
It was a subtle bit of color hidden in an otherwise dry recap of the Denver Nuggets evening, but the opening lead from this AP story has left at least one tipster scratching his head....
Texas Waits For Final Minute To Eat Ohio State's Soul
So I guess anyone who thought the Fiesta Bowl was a giant made-to-order bowl of Buckeye Soup (ahem) had another thing coming. Hey, when you're right 52% of the time ......
Hey, $%&*@!? Hands Off The Sweater Vest, Mack
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Colt McCoy: Got Milk?
Notice: No photos of Colt McCoy chugging Jack Daniels will be posted here in the foreseeable future. [Los Angeles Times]...