i Page 6701 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Derek Lowe Lets Everybody Know He's Done For The Day By Slamming A Cooler Full Of Ice
After he gave up seven earned runs on nine hits in five innings against the Tigers this afternoon, Derek Lowe was probably going get lifted by Indians manager Manny Acta. The Cleveland broadcast crew noticed that someone—Scott Barnes?—had begun warming up in the bullpen, but they didn't know for sur...

"Good Job, Good Effort" Kid Has Two Nicknames For Kevin Garnett, And One Of Them Is Unprintable
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Young Jack has opinions....

It Took Negative One Day For Euro 2012 Fans To Start Their Racist Chants
The tourney doesn't start until tomorrow; today was merely a practice for the Netherlands. A practice open to the public. The Dutch team began the practice session by jogging around a track in Krakow, and when they reached one end of the circuit, "several hundred" or around "500" fans began hooting ...

Pacific Northwest Newspaper Headline Sums Up Entire Region's Feelings: "Sonics Advance To Finals, Oh Wait"
At first glance, it looks like some copy editor is trolling Sonics fans on the sports front of the Tri-City Herald in Kennewick, Wash. But then you get to that subhead, and the intention becomes perfectly obvious. It's been four years since the Sonics packed up and left for the Great Plains, and it'...

I'm Worried About Quentin Tarantino's <em>Django Unchained</em>
It'd be difficult to find a bigger Quentin Tarantino fanboy than I am. It's a little embarrassing, actually; I was one of those nerds posting on alt.fans.tarantino dorkboards the year Justin Bieber was born. (The fact that Google archives Usenet forums from 20 years ago is just cruel.) I think Jacki...

Trent Williams Owns A Painting Of Himself As A Gorilla, Because Of Course He Does
Redskins tackle Trent Williams has a nickname: Silverback. It's a self-bestowed nickname, but he's really committed to the idea. He dropped six figures on a massive diamond gorilla head chain, had Roger Goodell introduce him as Silverback when he was drafted, and apparently has remodeled his basemen...

108-Foot Roy Hodgson Erected On English Coast
"Roy the Redeemer" was unveiled this week, a massive statue of England manager aping the famous Christ sculpture in Brazil. He stands above the cliffs of Dover, and is supposedly visible from France. (The two nations face each other on Monday.)...

Glory Days: Dez Bryant Whipped Out His Highlight Video Just To Taunt My Friend
An occasional series featuring our readers' tales of momentary sports glory. If you've got a video of your own brush with athletic greatness, send it to [email protected], subject: Glory Days....

The Mets Are Shamelessly Selling Commemorative Tickets To Johan Santana's No-Hitter For $50 Each
You see those tickets up there? They're from old Shea Stadium in 1969, the Amazin' Mets. Five bucks bought you a loge seat for the NLCS, and ten bucks bought you one for the World Series. That's a good price. The loge had a nice view. I would have enjoyed seeing the Miracle Mets' miracles from there...

The Single Worst Thing We've Ever Read In A Student-Athlete's Homework
Former Memphis DE Dasmine Cathey took a four-week mass communication course in the summer of 2010....

Why Does This High School Basketball Team Photo Have An Uzi And A Tank In It?
We all love laughing at old team photos. There's the passé fashion and the awkward facial expressions, and some dude's dumb dog is always the "team mascot." The photo above is no exception. Look at those short shorts! The bad haircuts! The gigantic tank and semi-automatic weapon! What a bunch of dw...

Curt Schilling's 38 Studios Files For Bankruptcy, Faces Federal Investigation
We presume this is how 38 Studios' lawyers opened their conversation with Curt Schilling: "What do you want first? The bad news, or the worse news?"...

Watch Mark Reynolds Strike Out 100 Times In Two Minutes
Last week, Baltimore Orioles first baseman/third baseman/designated hitter Mark Reynolds broke the record for fastest player to 1,000 career strikeouts. According to the Elias Sports Bureau, the record had belonged to Russell Branyan. But Branyan didn't get to set the record until 2010, when he w...

The Market For Yankees Tickets Is Worse Than We Thought
Yesterday we brought you news of a spat between the Yankees and StubHub, "the official ticket reseller of Major League Baseball." The Yankees aren't drawing, and they can't even move their own unsold tickets because they're being undercut by StubHub. (As I write this, it's five hours before first pi...

There Is No Best Player In The NBA: The Problem With The Basketball Hero Industry
The most unstoppable player on the winning team in the last Heat-Celtics game wasn't any one player at all. Here's an edited play-by-play:...

There's A Naughtily Named Pitching Matchup In The National League Today
Check it out: Petco Park this afternoon will host a hilarious sadomasochistic pitching showdown between Marquis and Cain! Thwack! You've been very naughty! Double entendres in baseball can't get much saucier than that....

Piss Cannons And Scrotum-Seeking Dogs: Poland Is READY For Euro 2012
We already dealt with the possibility of trouble inside the stadiums at the European Championship, starting tomorrow. But what about non-matchdays? It's one solid month of foreigners, drunk and nationalistic, roaming an unfamiliar country. Some countries (England) have a reputation for traveling in ...

Better Know An Umpire: Dan Iassogna
Welcome to Better Know An Umpire, an effort to educate ourselves on the human elements who have ultimate decision-making power over some 2,500 Major League Baseball games a year. (All cumulative statistics are through the 2011 season, unless otherwise stated.)...

Mayor Of Boston Credits "KJ" And "Hondo" For Team's Heart, Success
Mayor Thomas Menino has presided over Boston, city of champions, since 1993. He knows his sports. For instance, he once talked about the time "Varitek split the uprights." Now he's talking about "KJ" and "Hondo," the two Celtics with a lot of heart. He probably means to discuss Kevin "KG" Garnett ...

How To Not Piss Off The World With Your Email Signature
I once worked at an ad agency that forced employees to use an email signature. And not only did we have to have an email signature, but we had to rotate in new talking points about the company into the signature every week. "Did you know that Sturding Pooper Raper Lice was ranked a Top 50 Agency by ...