i Page 7944 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Media Approval Ratings: Frank Deford
We still can't quite get over Daulerio's interview with Frank Deford. This is still our favorite part:...
Duke Helps Ladies' Buttocks Feel More Comfortable
Because it's Thursday, and no Thursday is complete without some toilet humor, let's take a look at the great work done for women at the Duke football stadium....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Chuck Klosterman Revisits The Lakers-Celtics Rivalry
Readers of Chuck Klosterman's "Sex, Drugs & Cocoa Puffs" will remember the particularly amusing essay about the Lakers-Celtics rivalry of the '80s. To quote:...
Strap In, Folks: The MLB First-Year Player Draft Is Today!
We love baseball more than just about anything else on earth, so we appreciate them trying, but sorry, MLB: We just can't get excited about the MLB First-Year Player Draft today. (It starts at 2 p.m. ET, so set your Tivos to "stun.")...
Call The Kids, It's Another Profanity-Laced Tirade!
Ah, to return to the halcyon days of March 31, when the Mariners were 1-0 and all was right with the world. But today they're 18 games below .500, having lost four straight and 12 of their past 15. The latest, a 4-3 5-4 loss to the Angels, prompted manager John McLaren to spew some choice profanitie...
Loving That Stanley Cup
As is abundantly clear around here, we're hardly the biggest hockey experts, but we're still human, which means we really love the Stanley Cup Trophy. So rarely is any piece of hardware treated with such reverence; heck, in baseball, they try to hump the damn trophy....
Congratulations, Stanley Cup Champion Detroit Red Wings
The NHL Closer is written by five people of European descent at Melt Your Face Off. We're not the first people to blog the Stanley Cup Finals, but Don Cherry still calls us "soft". So, for all you kids out there, Raskolnikov toughened up to recapitulate Detroit's clincher....
About Last Night
What you missed while trashing your workplace because they took your red stapler ... • NHL: Heart like a wheel ... Wings win Stanley Cup! For Christ's sake, don't drop it! • MLB: Paul Konerko ends our suffering, White Sox beat Royals in 15. • NBA: Suns down to four coaching candidates. Hey, where's ...
Hey. You. I Know You, I Know You...
At what point does one realize they have a talent for synchronized swimming? Does it originate from one's ability to hold their legs together during an underwater hand-stand? The ability to splash silently during Marco Polo? Or how affectively they can execute Nomi Malone-style sex-flailing for styl...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch on your first night off from campaigning since January ... • Boxing: Light heavyweights, Yusef Mack vs. Daniel Judah, at New York (10:30 p.m., ET). Same-day tape ... do not reveal the ending! [ESPN2] • MLB: Tampa Bay at Boston (7 p.m., ET). A battle for the very soul of the East Divisi...
The Only Way To Protect Your Hooves
You might think that horse racing is all about the crazy hats, but The Fan's Attic informs us that it's now all about the shoes. Hey, who isn't wearing a pair of these right now?...
Lakers Versus Celtics Part XI: New Blood
The season series: The Celtics (66-16) enjoyed a 2-0 season sweep of the Lakers (57-25). On November 23, they won 107-94 in L.A. On December 10, they won 110-91 in Boston....
Jesus Saves, But Still Takes His Usual 15 Percent
You may know that outfielder Josh Hamilton's negotiations of a long-term contract with the Texas Rangers hit a snag recently when he suddenly changed agents; going from Matt Sosnick of Sosnick Cobbe Sports to Michael Moye of Moye Associaties. The reason? Hamilton is a born-again Christian, and "want...
Cauliflower Ears Get Mainstream Recognition Thanks To Kimbo
One of the more disturbing and enjoyably gross aspects of Saturday night's EliteXC prime time bloodfest was the inevitable popping of James "Colossus" Thompson's swelled cauliflower ear by the mighty right of Kimbo Slice. As Kimbo's fist kept wailing and wailing on the purple upper region of Thompso...
A Whipping To The Sunshine State Spearfish Mates
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...
Welcome To Internet Land, Mr. Reilly
Well, everybody's favorite paid-more-than-a-middle-infielder columnist made his debut today, and it's a nice little column ... about Rick Reilly. As far as Look, ESPN Readers, I'm Here! columns go, it's a step above Jemele Hill's — whom we still like — and a few steps behind Simmons' epic "Is Roger ...
So, Is There Really Any Chance The Red Sox Would Take A Chance On Bonds?
So, David Ortiz could be out for a while. Would the Red Sox dare ... could they ... oh heavens ... they have to consider it, don't they ... could they be considering Barry Bonds? The Red Sox, even though Bonds has called the city racist, seem to be keeping it in mind....
The Sadness Of Concrete Charlie
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th) awful...
Future Nobel Prize-Winning Author Drew Magary Espouses On The Historic Virtues Of Anonymity
This is BALLS DEEP With Drew Magary (Balls® is a registered trademark and has been used with the expressed written consent of AJ Daulerio). It's gonna be like an SI Point After column, only with dick jokes. You can email him here. Your regularly scheduled Balls Deep column will not appear this wee...