i Page 7992 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Final Four Without One Shining Moment
England's the country with the silent "u" in a lot of words, like colour and parlour, right? Yet both Brits and Yanks spell it "Final Four." And what's the deal with Ovaltine? Britain's FA Cup is down to four (finally!), starting the semifinal madness with West Bromfield Albion and Portsmouth. Neith...

Matt Leinart Suddenly Dirty
• Opening Day! • President Bush would have been a better commissioner. • Look: Daulerio works here now. • Matt Leinart once, and Matt Leinart twice. • Andy Roddick, doing OK for himself. • We miss Davidson already. • Stuart Scott on the microphone. • Joel Zumaya, bringing rock. • Larry King really, ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after discovering a new definition of nightmare fuel ... • Boxing: Heavyweights, Jason (Hunchback) Estrada vs. Lance (The Boston Bleeder) Whitaker, in Lincoln, R.I. (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • NBA: San Antonio Spurs vs. Utah Jazz (8 p.m., ET), Dallas Mavericks vs. Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 ...

NCAA Pants Party: Final Four
All right, well, the games finally tip back off tomorrow, and it's about time: Without any major storyline — The Chalk Bracket just doesn't tend to inspire people — it's been a bit of a slog this week....

Posing As An Unknown ESPN Analyst Not The Way To Score Teens
That man to your right is ESPN college basketball analyst Mark Adams. Some of you may recognize him; most of you may not. That still didn't stop a 48-year-old New Jersey man from posing as Mark Adams in a failed attempt to shack up with a teenage girl....

The Best $187 Million Ever Spent
As Isiah Thomas and the Knicks attempt to finish up their disastrous season and wait to find out what new GM Donnie Walsh will do to rejuvenate the team, it'd probably be a good idea to make sure he doesn't read this Portfolio.com article on how much Isiah has cost the Knicks. The magazine estimates...

Somebody Better Grab That Guy
La New Bears SS Lin Zhi-Shen completely losing his mind after a close play at first in this Friday night's 5-5 tie with the Brother Elephants, charging the first base umpire at full speed from the dugout for about 40 feet and clobbering him with his shoulder and forearm. The Umpire, no small fellow,...

Perhaps The Duke Hatred Has Gone Too Far
Buried in a fun interview with Slate sports editor Josh Levin was this amazing tidbit about the Washington Wizards' promotional team:...

I'm Going To The Olympic Torch Relay ... What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
The San Francisco Board of Supervisors recently announced the route that the Olympic Torch will take through The City this coming Tuesday; a waterfront jaunt beginning at AT&T Park's McCovey Cove and ending at Justin Herman Plaza. Since I'm going to be in that neck of the woods anyway, I'm going to ...

The Usual Dash Of Dollar Dog Night Bacchanalia
Wednesday night at the Philadelphia Phillies Citizens Bank Park marked opening night and its first official "Dollar Dog NIght" promotion, which culminated in a Phillies 1-0 loss and, as usual, another mesmerizing display of shit-faced chaos courtesy of the revved-up monkeys. Ever since the Phillies...

Matt Leinart Is Just Asking For It Now
And once again our hero returns with an even more breathtaking lack of self-awareness. TheDirty.com comes through with another photograph that is sure to disappoint Cardinals' coach Ken Whisenhunt again. This time, possibly, forever....

Benny The Bull: Free At Last!
Displaying the kind of investigative moxie that could have kept us out of this whole Iraq mess, the Chicago Sun-Times dug into Thursday's Benny the Bull T-shirt assault story and discovered that Benny had been wrongly accused! On Thursday it was reported that Benny — the costumed mascot for the Bull...

Rick Reilly's Borscht Belt Hilarity Now Targeting Bloggers
We have a hard time getting fired up about this stuff anymore, but if you're looking for more enlightening commentary on new media from an "established" sportswriter — and a screenwriter (kind of) — let's take a listen to impending omnipresent ESPN commentator Rick Reilly....

We Cannot Defend Freedom Abroad By Deserting It At Home
There's no news, boys, so go out there and make some news. Rob a bank, mug an old lady, whatever - just do something....

Storming The Floor's Final Four Preview
Storming The Floor looks at the Final Four, which tips off tomorrow. Oh, and this South Park "photo" of the coaches is from Gutty Little Bruins, which is probably why John Calipari looks a little off....

Tiger Sure Has Been Roaring A Lot
• Tiger Woods has been awfully angry lately. [Food Court Lunch] • Can Kevin Durant and Celtics fans still be friends? [The Bleacher Report] • A look at the top seven quarterback prospects. [The Grand National Championships] • Soccer guys, throwin' games. [Deuce Of Davenport] • See, now the producers...

40 Acres And A Mountaineer
University of Michigan football coach Rich Rodriguez is still in a messy legal battle with his former team, West Virginia University, about his old contract and the upcoming trial could possibly get ugly. The issue? The legality of the $4 million buyout Rodriguez's team of hard-nosed attorneys alleg...

Media Approval Ratings: Paul Zimmerman
It's rare that an NFL column makes us feel like we just drank a bottle of wine, but that's what Paul Zimmerman — Dr. Z, if you're down with the hip parlance — does for us....

Don't Even THINK About It, Brett
You know, this is gonna come as a shock to you — and we do hope you are sitting down — but apparently Brett Favre (seriously!) turns out (you ready?) to be (here it comes!) thinking of unretiring. We know, right?!...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......